Since you believe in soul mates, you can't possibly believe there is only one soul mate for you on this entire earth, right? God doesn't work like that. He gives us so many chances in our lives to learn from our mistakes and to grow. You have been dreaming about this woman for years. That's years of not connecting with others, because you keep allowing your brain to dwell on this dream woman. You let it consume you. You have imagined a life with her, but it is not real! You have allowed yourself to become obsessed with your dream of her. It is an unhealthy craving. Even if you won her over at this point, she would never live up to the expectations you have imagined about her. Women are to be cherished, not idolized. You cannot truly cherish a woman until you know her and establish a solid relationship with her. If I were in your situation, I would research how to break the habit of thinking about her, change my thoughts toward a happier and more productive life, focus more on God, and pray for someone who is right for me to enter my life.
----
When properly directed, zeal/passion is wonderful (Titus 2:14), but when it is misguided, it becomes a destructive, addictive distraction (Romans 10:2).