Hi, I’m new here. I’m 46 & from Melbourne, Australia. My problem is that I have been in a tumoultous relationship for about 18 months now. I have broken up with him several times. I haven’t seen him since May, partly due to breaking up & partly due to the fact that I have been quite ill. We are going to have dinner tomorrow night which is the first time we have seen each other since May. The thing is, I’m not sure how I feel about him now. I know I care about him. But he said something to me which happened back in May when I was last at his house, & even though he says he would never act on this, I can’t get past what he told me. I don’t feel comfortable in going to his place again. At least, not until I get my head around it. I just need some advice. I don’t want to lose him: he told me the other night that if I end it again or continue playing “mind games” with him he can/ will walk away- which he never has done yet. I know I’ve been the one who has always ended the relationship in the past. He’s always been there. Part of me is angry at him saying this: I tried to explain that my depression causes me to doubt myself & makes me think I’m not worthy of being loved/ I’m not playing mind games. I don’t think he really understands my condition. I’m not sure what I should do.
I'm sorry that you are dealing with these hard questions and circumstances, life can be hard, huh?
I just want to suggest that you turn your focus towards your relationship with Christ; write to Him, read the word with Him, go to the chat room here or to bible study and talk about Him. Be so determined to make Him the desires of your heart that thinking about your emotional state or that relationship takes a back seat for awhile. I pray that you find rest in our Lord and Savior because in the hard times, lonely times, easy times and fulfilled times, He is our sufficiency. I am giving myself the same advice. Love you and God Bless you and yours. I'm saying a prayer for you, right now.
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