Should Christians Date or Court?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
S

Shine4Jesus

Guest
#41
#41
Courtship is a good idea, the only opinion that counts in dating is mine or God anyway. So to me I prefer that word over the now term call dating. Seriously , most people stop valuing there parents opinions eons ago when it comes to dating. That being said courting work just fine as long as it is modernized.
 
mystdancer50

mystdancer50

Senior Member
#42
Feb 26, 2012
2,522
50
48
#42
maxwel said:
I don't believe in courting or dating.
I hope to be more biblical than that.

When I'm ready to settle down,
I'll just send my servant into the desert with a camel train loaded with jewelry...

and tell him to bring me back a wife.

: )
Click to expand...
Hmmm...be careful with that. You'll never know who your servant may bring back, especially if your servant hates you. :)

But seriously, God doesn't do the same thing with us all. Eve came from a rib, Ruth came from Moab with her mother-in-law, Esther was chosen among countless other women...I could go on, but I'm tired, so I won't. :)
 
maxwel

maxwel

Senior Member
#43
Apr 18, 2013
9,482
2,548
113
#43
Courtship is a good idea, the only opinion that counts in dating is mine or God anyway. So to me a prefer that word over the now term call dating. Seriously , most people stop valuing there parents opinions eons ago that being said courting work just fine as long as it is modernized.
Click to expand...

It's true the term "dating" is definitely not in the bible.

But, err... neither is "courting".

Shhhhh.

: )
 
mystdancer50

mystdancer50

Senior Member
#44
Feb 26, 2012
2,522
50
48
#44
maxwel said:
It's true the term "dating" is definitely not in the bible.

But, err... neither is "courting".

Shhhhh.

: )
Click to expand...
Indeed. :) It was mainly about arranged marriages. The one incident I can recall where dating existed was Samson and Delilah and, well, that didn't work out too well for Samson. I think that tells me all I need to know about dating.

I'm being light-hearted here...so please don't beat me with the proverbial stick...I've had a rough day. :D
 
A

AprilAngel

Guest
#45
#45
I believe in spending time with the person you are interested in (as true in my life right now *big grinz*)
I believe people should get to know ones spiritual beliefs, even if they are friends for a long time, they may not ask the questions that really matter (as was the case for me a while back after a failed relationship) some serious questions for ladies to ask men would be how they feel in their spiritual walk in their ability to lead you in your walk. and in fact what DO they believe, do these core things match with what you believe? are they things that are truely VITAL to your spiritual health or are you willing to listen and see what the other believes.

Do not try to change a man to what you may want!! it will not work! take time to evaluate eachothers specific needs wants and listen to what God is saying. Don't rush in, that almost always leads to falling apart, even if in the beginning you meant well.
 
S

Shine4Jesus

Guest
#46
#46
maxwel said:
It's true the term "dating" is definitely not in the bible.

But, err... neither is "courting".

Shhhhh.



: )
Click to expand...
Not in biblical times, more like the 19th through 21st century. And besides I never read a Hebrew bible thoroughly.
 
A

AprilAngel

Guest
#47
#47
NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
Christian dating/courting is so ridiculous.

Hi i know we just met, but I'm Holly let's see if were compatible to get married. Now take me to your father i wana see what your gonna look like in 30 years!!!!

I don't like dating christian men honestly.. It's so intense.... so serious! I just want to get to know him and see if i even like the guy before i even THINK about marriage. On the first date or whatever you courting people call it
Instead of asking what's your favorite movie? Or where did you grow up?
It's more like. How many kids do you want? What kind of wedding do you want to have?


Courting is all.. marriage, marriage and parents....... marriage and parents and people!! Marriage parents and people following you around making sure you don't grope each other under the dinner table..

I read those two Joshua smoshua books... wasn't impressed.

I think some of you single people are livin in la la land. God is just going to drop my husband or wife in my lap if he wants me to get married... ... What if he desires for you to get married, but your to busy thinking God is a magical genie and put no work or effort into it.

Maybe i should quit work, because if God wanted me to have money he would just give it to me.
Click to expand...
I wonder what makes you feel this way.
 
maxwel

maxwel

Senior Member
#48
Apr 18, 2013
9,482
2,548
113
#48
mystdancer50 said:
Indeed. :) It was mainly about arranged marriages. The one incident I can recall where dating existed was Samson and Delilah and, well, that didn't work out too well for Samson. I think that tells me all I need to know about dating.

I'm being light-hearted here...so please don't beat me with the proverbial stick...I've had a rough day. :D
Click to expand...
Yeah, it was mainly about arranged marriages.

I can't imagine if my parents picked a spouse for me.

My father would pick a really hot chick that was dumb as a rock.
My mother would pick a really nice girl with a face that would scare her own pets.
I'd be looking for something more in the middle, lol.
:)

Would anyone here actually trust their parents to pick their spouse?
Show of hands?
Anyone?
Anyone?
 
mystdancer50

mystdancer50

Senior Member
#49
Feb 26, 2012
2,522
50
48
#49
maxwel said:
Yeah, it mainly about arranged marriages.

I can't imagine if my parents picked a spouse for me.

My father would pick a really hot chick that was dumb as a rock.
My mother would pick a really nice girl with a face that would scare her own pets.
I'd be looking for something more in the middle, lol.
:)

Would anyone here actually trust their parents to pick their spouse?
Show of hands?
Anyone?
Anyone?
Click to expand...
I trust my Heavenly Father to choose my spouse and, thought I know it is widely unpopular, even here, that is what He is doing for me. Yup. I am leaving it entirely up to Him, not saying that I am doing nothing while I'm waiting. He is constantly teaching me and changing me and stretching me in preparation. And, should He not have a spouse for me, I am good with that too, as I've said elsewhere. :)

My trust relationship with God is one that very few understand or appreciate. :D
 
A

AprilAngel

Guest
#50
#50
maxwel said:
Yeah, it was mainly about arranged marriages.

I can't imagine if my parents picked a spouse for me.

My father would pick a really hot chick that was dumb as a rock.
My mother would pick a really nice girl with a face that would scare her own pets.
I'd be looking for something more in the middle, lol.
:)

Would anyone here actually trust their parents to pick their spouse?
Show of hands?
Anyone?
Anyone?
Click to expand...
NOOOOO *shudders* scary thought!
 
thecreationtutor

thecreationtutor

Senior Member
#51
Jun 30, 2011
2,521
35
0
#51
He wrote that book after a break up, so I found the book skewed a bit

Christians should be different from the world, in all things
 
thecreationtutor

thecreationtutor

Senior Member
#52
Jun 30, 2011
2,521
35
0
#52
also found it interesting that he talked about his now wife, cried about his conviction not to date, but then he gave it up once he found out she was interested
 
thecreationtutor

thecreationtutor

Senior Member
#53
Jun 30, 2011
2,521
35
0
#53
I would recommend 2 books - how to find a date worth keeping, and Thrive, the single live as God intended - both really good books to be read together
 
T

Tintin

Guest
#55
#55
I find that there's such a hullaballoo over courtship and dating and people (ie. Christians) often have different definitions for each. To me, courtship is something akin to the Jane Austen model - very stiff and arranged, old school, not focused on romance at all or even knowing the person. Dating, Godly dating is about getting to know the other person and enjoying their company with integrity. It's about looking for a Godly long-term relationship that may lead to marriage. I think it's okay to talk about the small stuff too. Do not find a guy/girl only to scare them away with - marriage, babies, how many? on the first date/interaction. That's immature and would be beyond scary. That behaviour does nothing to honour the other person and it only makes you seem like a 'super-spiritual' cad. Get to know the person, really get to know them. If you enjoy each other and feel God's telling both of you (not just one of you) to take it further (pray about it, don't ask the Universe for an answer) then go for it, take the next step.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.