Single and alone?

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Aug 13, 2013
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#22
I have made friendships galore.
How do you do that? In 2 years back at church I have not made one real true friend. Are you sure they are your friend or are they just being nice to you?

I know someone at church and she calls everyone a "friend". People she volunteers with, next door neighbors, people at church. I know she is not friends with them all.

As far as I know she has 2 or 3 real close friends. The others that she calls "friends" are mere acquaintances. She uses the word too loosely.

Maybe you dont have friends galore. You only think you do. I thought I had a friend, but she has no time to be a real friend. She just uses that word like it means nothing.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#23
How do you do that? In 2 years back at church I have not made one real true friend. Are you sure they are your friend or are they just being nice to you?

I know someone at church and she calls everyone a "friend". People she volunteers with, next door neighbors, people at church. I know she is not friends with them all.

As far as I know she has 2 or 3 real close friends. The others that she calls "friends" are mere acquaintances. She uses the word too loosely.

Maybe you dont have friends galore. You only think you do. I thought I had a friend, but she has no time to be a real friend. She just uses that word like it means nothing.
The more friends one has the least significant each one becomes. This lady is obviously very friendly.
 
M

Moving4ward

Guest
#24
You are not alone, I am right here in the same boat with you. There was a woman who spoke at church about how much she enjoyed being single and how much of a blessing it was for her. I believe she was sincere. But I remember feeling guilty or that something must be wrong with me because I did not feel that way. I struggled for a long time thinking I must not be "Christian " enough because I did not feel the same way as she did. I wish I knew the answer, but I don't. I just didn't want you to be under the false impression that you are the only one who feels this way.
Some people may enjoy a solitary, isolated life. Society calls these people loners. Sad but true. I am not a hermit. I want to fellowship with real, live, breathing people and not be content with patting myself on the back because I like being alone and talking to people mostly by computer...

What's your take?

:D
 
May 25, 2015
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#25
Sometimes when we are single and all by ourselves, we tend to limit what we do, I think. Though I'm sick and tired being alone, the world has not stop turning. While life goes on even there's lots of hurts and pain in life, there are things that just have to get going.


What have you achieved being single and alone or rather what are you looking forward to achieving in the next few months?


For me, I've got the keys to my own unit and renovation is scheduled to start coming Friday! Woo hoo! What's next? I'm working on my final assignment, though I have not started this weekend but I will make sure I start working on it tomorrow. I'm target to graduate this October with Master of Christian Studies.


What's after all that? I guess, it's time for me to start promoting my catering business? Yeah, I think so....

How about you?
So, I'm just going to be honest. I love, love, love being single. When I started dating my boyfriend, I actually didn't want to be in a relationship in the beginning. Obviously I love being with him! He's one of the best things that has happened to me in this season.

When people used to tell me, "I can do what I want when I'm single and I don't have to answer to anyone," I didn't understand that until I did exactly that. I never limited myself, but I did what I had to do and I loved it.

I started doing a lot of things for myself. I made time for friends, I made time to start reading books I wanted to begin, I had people over and cooked for them, I held parties, I went out with friends, I took walks.

Of course, I know what loneliness feels like. I used to be miserable being single and was absolutely lonely. Until I really learned from God that I needed to make the best of my loneliness. He started to change my outlook on being single and helped me to enjoy it.

Don't get me wrong, my boyfriend is my teammate. Him and I both build each other up. We both support each other. and we both love each other. I am so grateful that God brought us together. I just learned a lot in my singleness and learned how to be grateful in every season. It is hard to do! Especially if you are feeling lonely :( I get it. I totally get it.

I think that is awesome you're graduating so soon! We need to talk more about your studies! I went to Bible college for a degree in ministry. What would you want to do afterwards? :)
 

Born_Again

Senior Member
Nov 15, 2014
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#26
A couple of nights ago i was lounged on the couch with a bowl of pop-corn and watching a movie. I was super comfortable. I took a moment and thought "Im comfortable because there isnt a woman wanting cuddle with me lol" Even in the lonely times, I realize that it would be hard giving up what I consider to be "earned freedom" after 10 years of marriage. lol To each their own I guess. But I personally do not recommend marriage. Own the couch!! Dont share your popcorn!!! You've earned it!!! LOL
 
A

AuntieAnt

Guest
#27
I was married for many years. My husband passed away over ten years ago. I have dated some but nothing too serious. I have not dated for about 3 yrs now because I got tired of the dating scene. I would like to find one true companion, someone nice to enjoy activities with and eventually develop a serious relationship.

I'm not desperately lonely. I've never had an issue with enjoying life by myself, dining out alone, traveling alone, attending social affairs by myself, etc. I like to have fun and can create my own adventures. But I also think it would be very nice to meet someone to have adventures together.
 
Aug 13, 2013
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#28
Having friends over and having parties and having a boyrfriend is not being single and alone. Are you kidding me? LOL

:D
 
Aug 13, 2013
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#29
A couple of nights ago i was lounged on the couch with a bowl of pop-corn and watching a movie. I was super comfortable. I took a moment and thought "Im comfortable because there isnt a woman wanting cuddle with me lol" Even in the lonely times, I realize that it would be hard giving up what I consider to be "earned freedom" after 10 years of marriage. lol To each their own I guess. But I personally do not recommend marriage. Own the couch!! Dont share your popcorn!!! You've earned it!!! LOL
You think marriage is bad, but being alone with no fellowship or freinds can be just as bad. I would like to have a friend to watch movies and to eat popcorn with.

Who wants to spend 52 weekends alone every year with just the couch the tv and the remote? I am not a hermit that lives in a cave that some single people are content in being. It is too anti-social for me. Sorry that's just how I see it.
 
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Man4TheWord

Guest
#30
You know God created the entire universe and said it was good. Yet, He created man in His image, and said after seeing him walking alone, "it's not good that man should be alone." It's just simple companionship, that even God indicates is needed. "A help mate." Perhaps you are looking to get out of relationships what you're creator never intended. God should fulfill your existence, a spouse is someone to support, and go through life with you. In fact the bible indicated that being married will make you less "happy" Because you are pulled between the needs of your spouse and the needs of your relationship with God.
 
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LiJo

Guest
#31
I was very content with my life before my current relationship. I was comfortable going out to eat by myself or to the movies. I had no trouble finding friends to join if I wanted company. I can pretty much just pick up and go whenever I wanted to travel. (I had to confirm the Ex can take care of my teenagers of course) Now that I'm in a relationship, it's wonderful, he's an added bonus to my life.
 
Dec 1, 2014
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#32
I was very content with my life before my current relationship. I was comfortable going out to eat by myself or to the movies. I had no trouble finding friends to join if I wanted company. I can pretty much just pick up and go whenever I wanted to travel. (I had to confirm the Ex can take care of my teenagers of course) Now that I'm in a relationship, it's wonderful, he's an added bonus to my life.
If he took the picture that is now your avatar he must be a really cool guy. Not just any olé cool but Utahcool. :cool:

And and it goes without saying you must be pretty awesome!
 
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Guest
#33
Have not been on a date since my son's mom and I split up 11 years ago. No dinners, movies, visits...nothing. Really don't think about it too often; have just come to accept it.
 

Born_Again

Senior Member
Nov 15, 2014
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#34
You think marriage is bad, but being alone with no fellowship or freinds can be just as bad. I would like to have a friend to watch movies and to eat popcorn with.

Who wants to spend 52 weekends alone every year with just the couch the tv and the remote? I am not a hermit that lives in a cave that some single people are content in being. It is too anti-social for me. Sorry that's just how I see it.
Like I said, to each their own. This is just my preference. I happen to like it this way. And, i do have times of fellowship. I am very active in my church. I have a small group i attend on Monday nights. I do youth ministry on Wednesday. And, of course, I attend the same mentioned church regularly on Sunday. When I have my kids, I do things with them. We go for walks, we go out to eat occasionally. We go to the park and things like that. Im not a total hermit. I just dont want anyone else around outside of those activities.

Last night was very similar. I ran to the store, bought stuff for dinner, came home and cooked, and then put in a movie and watched it while I ate. lol Its very relaxing. This is just my preference. I dont need others to entertain me.
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#35
Am I the only person that sees a distinct difference between being anti-social and being non-social? Just curious. I think there is a difference, but maybe it's just the voices in my head telling me there is.
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#37
an·ti·so·cial
ˌan(t)ēˈsōSHəl,ˌan(t)īˈsōSHəl/
adjective




  • 1.
    contrary to the laws and customs of society; devoid of or antagonistic to sociable instincts or practices.
    [TABLE="class: vk_tbl vk_gy"]
    [TR]
    [TD="class: lr_dct_nyms_ttl"]synonyms:[/TD]
    [TD]sociopathic, distasteful, disruptive, rebellious, misanthropic, asocial"worrisome antisocial behavior"

    [/TD]
    [/TR]
    [/TABLE]



  • 2.
    not sociable; not wanting the company of others.
    [TABLE="class: vk_tbl vk_gy"]
    [TR]
    [TD="class: lr_dct_nyms_ttl"]synonyms:[/TD]
    [TD]unsociable, unfriendly, uncommunicative, reclusive, withdrawn, avoidant;informalstandoffish
    "I'm feeling a bit antisocial"

    [/TD]
    [/TR]
    [/TABLE]

    nonsocial
    adjective non·so·cial \-ˈsō-shəl\
    Popularity: Bottom 30% of words
    Definition of nonsocial


    • : not socially oriented : lacking a social component


 
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Aug 2, 2009
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#38
Sometimes when we are single and all by ourselves, we tend to limit what we do, I think. Though I'm sick and tired being alone, the world has not stop turning. While life goes on even there's lots of hurts and pain in life, there are things that just have to get going.
Day after day I must face a world of strangers
Where I don't belong, I'm not that strong
It's nice to know that there's someone I can turn to
Who will always care, you're always there

When there's no getting over that rainbow
When my smallest of dreams won't come true
I can take all the madness the world has to give
But I won't last a day without you

So many times when the city seems to be without a friendly face
A lonely place
It's nice to know that you'll be there if I need you
And you'll always smile, it's all worthwhile

When there's no getting over that rainbow
When my smallest of dreams won't come true
I can take all the madness the world has to give
But I won't last a day without you

[video=youtube;g3GZAN69IXg]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3GZAN69IXg[/video]
 

mar09

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2014
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#39
Cool voice, nice tempo and melody, zero, wc we played and sang at home with sibs. i didnt know it had spanish words.
 

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
Aug 2, 2009
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#40
Cool voice, nice tempo and melody, zero, wc we played and sang at home with sibs. i didnt know it had spanish words.
It's The Carpenters, they had a lot of big hits in the 70's. Karen Carpenter is the singer and her brother plays the piano and I think he writes all the songs too. The words are only in english, but the video shows spanish so spanish-speaking people will know what she's singing about. :)