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I used to think that too, before it happened to me. Sometimes it's boundary issues. Getting too close to someone else and developing feelings for them. That actually (most of the time) has nothing to do with the jilted spouse at all. (I've read a lot about that recently.) It happens more than people realize. A midlife crisis, unhappiness with your own life in general... all sorts of reasons that don't necessarily have to do with any preexisting marriage problems.
Of course, every marriage COULD be better, and I know I've realized lots of things I could have done to be a better wife. Either way, if one spouse has a problem, they have an obligation to let the other spouse know. I definitely agree that it's important to know why a marriage failed, whether or not there was anything that could have prevented it. I just see problems with a blanket statement that if there's cheating in a marriage, it must be because the one cheated on was not meeting the needs of their partner. That sometimes is true but often it isn't.
Of course, every marriage COULD be better, and I know I've realized lots of things I could have done to be a better wife. Either way, if one spouse has a problem, they have an obligation to let the other spouse know. I definitely agree that it's important to know why a marriage failed, whether or not there was anything that could have prevented it. I just see problems with a blanket statement that if there's cheating in a marriage, it must be because the one cheated on was not meeting the needs of their partner. That sometimes is true but often it isn't.
"People don't fall in and out of love. Some day, sooner or later, you're going to get into an argument with your wife. When you do, all of a sudden you'll start telling yourself the female co worker you work with understands you a lot better than your wife does."
He was dead on. People sometimes forget to guard their hearts and they develop an emotional affair with someone and it lands them in deep water.
I've never had an emotional affair or had it happen to me, but I hope that advice was still sound. I'll take my tongue out of my cheek now .