I'm surrounded by people who are pretty certain that they could live my life far better than I'm doing it. Every single decision I make is under scrutiny and open for ridicule and judgment by a few select members of my family.
I know this happens to people a lot- families are often cruel to each other, I am not the first person to experience this from the people I was raised by/with.
That doesn't make it hurt any less.
I feel selfish, in a way, because I know everyone has their own struggles and pain, and yet here I am somehow expecting my family to show a little kindness just because of my current situation. Just because they're my family. I somehow thought that because of their own pasts, they might be compassionate, rather than angry and demeaning.
This is the type of thing I've just walked out on...
but you can't divorce your family.
And maybe some of them are right about me; maybe they see something I don't. I'm not unwilling to listen...but it's awfully hard to hear any truth when it's buried in insults.
Absolute truth, and does your family have your best interests at heart, even though it comes out as condemning?
As I see you said in your post.
So bypassing the emotion that does beset us as physical beings. maybe if we can not take it as condemnation and seek what really is being said. Is it truly they care or are they after something else?
Usually when it is family, it is because they do care and yet do not know how to express it to you, and then when we take it wrong we react badly and the situation becomes worse right?
So, as I see this living so long as being the servant at the last supper, ha ha, get a little laugh.
My reaction to any and all situations is key.
I learned this one day and want it to stay as a trait
What i learned one day was when I got into an argument, I ended up angry over it what i felt was being said to me.
Out in the back yard on the hammock, talking and saying well they deserved ny anger, justifying it to me, when I heard this, go back and apologize your my anger.
I said what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, it was not my fault, they treated me badly, it is their fault and they need apologize to me
Then I heard this, it does not matter who's fault, What matters is your reaction in anger as if you do not know me your Savior, is what you conveyed to them.
Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I heard, understood and listened and went and did, Apologized, and saw their reaction as if they won something, seeing the pride in them, and wanted again to react in anger over this.
But said this instead, my apology is not for the situation we fought over, it is for how I reacted to it, as if i do not know Jesus, that is what I am sorry for
Hope you see this, which i think you do,
prays are said to live above your circumstances in all things presented in front of you. knowing in your own heart, you are doing the best you can. so ask them to maybe say what they are saying differently, that you do not understand and want to. that does reveal, the motives of others