When I first read the title of the OP, I knew it had to be Seolsearch...and yep I was right lol.
It's an interesting and important subject. I think after reading a lot of the great responses that we can agree that we don't marry someone because of looks, but there has to be some sort of attraction. The physical attraction may be instant or may it may happen over a period of time. However, as we all know already, that if it is just physical attraction the relationship is going nowhere.
I don't think that if you truly love someone you will fall out of love because they go grey or lose their hair (maybe both) and now have plastic teeth replacing the old originals. If this is the case I would suggest there is more going on behind the scenes than just the physical attraction. In this case we would have to personally review what we think love is, what we mean when we say we love Jesus, and what does it mean to love as Jesus has taught us. If you are viewing your partner as unattractive due to the aging process or illness, then I would think we would need to ask why?
The 'why' question is an easy one to answer. Maybe you feel trapped and could be doing better things (whatever that may be), or you are attracted to someone new...there are a thousands reasons.. but (for the christian) they all narrow down to 1 thing. How much do you love Jesus. (I know at this point you are probably rolling your eyes and thinking here he goes lol).
This is very important.. How much do you love Jesus. He should be your first love above all things - even those desires that make you think you are not attracted to you spouse whatever they may be. When you love Jesus you see HOW he loved you even when you were ugly in sin and the depths of His love for you even while you still sin! HOW do you love your spouse. You dedicate your lives to them plain and simple.. So delve deep inside and ask yourself what is the real problem. They say the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.. but as many have learned it is harder to cut!
Although the OP was hypothetical, I think it happens in real life. What is really sad about it is that the reasons most break ups are for shallow selfish reasons.. it's the pride thing rearing its nasty and ugly head. Its the self 'pleasure' need. That pleasure could be anything.. more freedom (perceived), more time on the golf course etc etc.. All these self interest needs build up to the point where you no longer feel attracted to your spouse.
That is why I would stress to someone in that position/situation... How much do you love Jesus! Our love begins there.. and by His grace he will strengthen your love for your spouse - if you remove your pride, selfishness and worldly desires. Is it easy? No! Is anything worth it easy? No!
I know, relationships aren't always a bed of roses.. but you work things out. This may sound cliche but you love your spouse in the same way Jesus showed and shows His love for you.
It is also essential for couples to pray together and bible study together (well I think so).
So for me the answer to the hypothetical is. How much do you love Jesus!
It's an interesting and important subject. I think after reading a lot of the great responses that we can agree that we don't marry someone because of looks, but there has to be some sort of attraction. The physical attraction may be instant or may it may happen over a period of time. However, as we all know already, that if it is just physical attraction the relationship is going nowhere.
I don't think that if you truly love someone you will fall out of love because they go grey or lose their hair (maybe both) and now have plastic teeth replacing the old originals. If this is the case I would suggest there is more going on behind the scenes than just the physical attraction. In this case we would have to personally review what we think love is, what we mean when we say we love Jesus, and what does it mean to love as Jesus has taught us. If you are viewing your partner as unattractive due to the aging process or illness, then I would think we would need to ask why?
The 'why' question is an easy one to answer. Maybe you feel trapped and could be doing better things (whatever that may be), or you are attracted to someone new...there are a thousands reasons.. but (for the christian) they all narrow down to 1 thing. How much do you love Jesus. (I know at this point you are probably rolling your eyes and thinking here he goes lol).
This is very important.. How much do you love Jesus. He should be your first love above all things - even those desires that make you think you are not attracted to you spouse whatever they may be. When you love Jesus you see HOW he loved you even when you were ugly in sin and the depths of His love for you even while you still sin! HOW do you love your spouse. You dedicate your lives to them plain and simple.. So delve deep inside and ask yourself what is the real problem. They say the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.. but as many have learned it is harder to cut!
Although the OP was hypothetical, I think it happens in real life. What is really sad about it is that the reasons most break ups are for shallow selfish reasons.. it's the pride thing rearing its nasty and ugly head. Its the self 'pleasure' need. That pleasure could be anything.. more freedom (perceived), more time on the golf course etc etc.. All these self interest needs build up to the point where you no longer feel attracted to your spouse.
That is why I would stress to someone in that position/situation... How much do you love Jesus! Our love begins there.. and by His grace he will strengthen your love for your spouse - if you remove your pride, selfishness and worldly desires. Is it easy? No! Is anything worth it easy? No!
I know, relationships aren't always a bed of roses.. but you work things out. This may sound cliche but you love your spouse in the same way Jesus showed and shows His love for you.
It is also essential for couples to pray together and bible study together (well I think so).
So for me the answer to the hypothetical is. How much do you love Jesus!
