Would you ever?

[secularhermit]

Thank you for believing me.

I believe you too!

My mother, as many people I know always said our "religios", our "christianism" serves to hide serial killers, prostitutes, gays, druggers, etc., etc. But the real thing is THEY ARE REJECTING GOD, not us. Thet said: I have the corect religion (Their syncretism missed up with horoscope, sexual intercourses with several people the same month and all those things I cannot tell clear here).

We are not perfect (that´s true) but their selfrighteousness is bigger than OURS (we boast on being "saved" yet, our denominations, "OUR" church, etc).

They don´t look at the point, but at our faults, our sins, and it is easy to say: You are not saved, when they keep their lives the way they are "pleased" (but the is not contenment in sinning).

 

[secularhermit]

I'm sorry to hear about your experience with dating those "Christian" men.

(...) And I know that they will be accountable to God for their actions.

As you said, I don´t agree: "Guys can still deceive us, especially ones who have studied how to deceive women, or practiced it. "

Sinning has no sex. The gender is OUT when hurting, liying and you are quite right, the "fruit" is shown by the coherency of words plus DEEDs.

 

[secularhermit]

I define casual dating as barely more than friends(...), but no hearts are on the line. (...) then you become exclusive.

I don´t believe my heart is blind when asking a woman to go out.

 

[Arwen4CJ]

As you said, I don´t agree: "Guys can still deceive us, especially ones who have studied how to deceive women, or practiced it. "

Sinning has no sex. The gender is OUT when hurting, liying and you are quite right, the "fruit" is shown by the coherency of words plus DEEDs.

I didn't mean that women do not deceive....but I was speaking of men because the person I was responding to was a woman.

I also think there are some differences in issues that men and women have when having to deal with dating related things. Men are sometimes the victims of rape and other crimes, but usually it is women who are raped, or women who are lured into situations that are physically dangerous.

Women hurt men in relationships, too.....but I think it is generally different, or at least to a different degree.

 

[polarguyinak]

You made me the subject of the sentences, the one doing the actions. That implies fault.
You seem confused
You were not raped. . .
you obviously weren't with . . .
you haven't ever dated any

Hmmm... I've got one more for you then...
You obviously didn't read the rest of those sentences...

...because they were in no way blaming you.

 

[Misty77]

Hmmm... I've got one more for you then...
You obviously didn't read the rest of those sentences...

...because they were in no way blaming you.

It's a grammar thing. It wasn't intentional, but it betrayed the thoughts of the one who wrote it.

 

[just_monicat]

what a kettle of fish that can be.

in a previous life, i was all about what i considered "innocent" dating. i figured that there was nothing wrong with taking the fast food approach toward meeting and getting to know somebody in a very respectful way. i had it all sorted out in my head that if i was upfront about being a christian, that naturally, i would meet men who identify themselves in such a manner because they would have similarly honorable and good intentions.

what i found is that christian is a label that became so worthless to those that bandied it about and i stopped using it for awhile and substituted "christ-follower". many so-called christians have enough jargon down that they can pull it off for a bit, between the "getting to know you" discussion (and in some cases un/willing suspension of disbelief).

the problem is that even when you have it worked out in your head and understand what your goals are, you can't be sure that the other one is on the same page. for over 6 months this guy i went out with twice and talked to on the phone a couple times with responded to my (very kind and sincere) rejection with stalking me, including coming to my church and sitting behind me, following me online and called me so much i had to change my number, not to mention casually driving by my house at all hours, and he was one of the more innocuous of the "nightmare guys".

eventually i learned to be far more clear about my specific requirements, and to do a better job of vetting candidates before allowing them to consider that we were doing anything that resembles a "date". i also rethought things, and learned to date a bit differently as well. i am still quite naive and optimistic about much, but all i can say is that the best i hope for with non-christian guys are friendship, and even then one has to be very mindful of that.

 

[polarguyinak]

It's a grammar thing. It wasn't intentional, but it betrayed the thoughts of the one who wrote it.

Completely false. You're putting false words into my mouth and mischaracterizing me. I think you should re-read the things I *actually wrote* - instead of your creatively edited versions - and take back the slander. You intentionally shaved off half the sentence to make it sound like I was saying something I wasn't, and then tell me those twisted fragments belie the thoughts behind my sentence. That's pretty twisted, and I think you ought to reconsider doing that to people. That's pretty messed up.

 

[polarguyinak]

I also find it pretty ironic that after making yourself the center of attention, you've got a big problem when someone uses parallelism to respond, keeping you as the subject of the sentence. It's a grammar thing. No one is trying to attack you. You started making false assertions about my intent.

 

[Misty77]

I also find it pretty ironic that after making yourself the center of attention, you've got a big problem when someone uses parallelism to respond, keeping you as the subject of the sentence. It's a grammar thing. No one is trying to attack you. You started making false assertions about my intent.

I have worked with top grammarians so I'm not making this up. But we will address what you actually said.

Christian men have done some very bad things to me....
You seem confused about the term "Christian".
They identified themselves as Christians, used Christian lingo, and otherwise seemed to behave as Christians. I know what Christian means and to call me confused is insulting to my intelligence.
...I was raped by a "good Christian guy" wearing a Jesus Tshirt with a really cheap-looking cross tattoo on his left shoulder.
You were not raped by a good Christian guy. You were raped by a non-Christian poser.
See answer above.
So yeah, I didn't feel safe with "good Christian guys."
That's because you obviously weren't with good Christian guys.
People passing themselves off as good Christian men have done a lot of evil so at that time I couldn't trust that anyone else carrying the same label would be any different. I had found that they were trying to appear to be something they were not while those who weren't Christians were more honest and accepting.
It was really therapeutic, and he treated me with honor than no Christian man I have ever dated (sounds like you haven't ever dated any) has ever extended to me.
A few dozen first dates and a handful of relationships, you would think at least one would be different.

I still think that there are probably decent Christian men out there, but this was about one specific relationship in a really difficult time.

 

[polarguyinak]

I have worked with many people of various skill sets as well. It doesn't mean that I now automatically know what I'm talking about regarding them.

Since you still want to infer that you know my intent, I will share it implicitly. Your not so subtle intent was to submit to Christians in a Christian forum that sometimes dating a non-Christian is better than dating a good Christian. I was exposing this as a deception, whether an intentional one on your part or not. I have no reason not to believe that these things happened in your life. I have no reason to believe that they were your fault. But I DO have a big problem with your teaching on a Christian forum that sometimes it's better for a Christian to pursue a romantic relationship with a non-Christian. It never is. The problem isn't that some Christian men are less trustworthy than non-Christian. The problem is that some people are misidentified as Christian.

Seeking to be yoked with someone who doesn't pursue Christ is not just "playing with fire", it's against the word of God.

 

[Misty77]

I have worked with many people of various skill sets as well. It doesn't mean that I now automatically know what I'm talking about regarding them.

Since you still want to infer that you know my intent, I will share it implicitly. Your not so subtle intent was to submit to Christians in a Christian forum that sometimes dating a non-Christian is better than dating a good Christian. I was exposing this as a deception, whether an intentional one on your part or not. I have no reason not to believe that these things happened in your life. I have no reason to believe that they were your fault. But I DO have a big problem with your teaching on a Christian forum that sometimes it's better for a Christian to pursue a romantic relationship with a non-Christian. It never is. The problem isn't that some Christian men are less trustworthy than non-Christian. The problem is that some people are misidentified as Christian.

Seeking to be yoked with someone who doesn't pursue Christ is not just "playing with fire", it's against the word of God.

I repeatedly said that I never recommended it, but I shared my experience. Would you prefer that I lie? It was a very healing, helpful relationship at the time. I'm not going to be dishonest or parrot what people like you expect me to say. No ear-tickling here.

 

[Eddy]

If a person is a non-believer be patient, be patient while trying to convince her or him with words of truth. If no results are found, let go because that might probably not have been chosen before the foundation of the world. This is not for everyone. That is why there is a trap. Remember God said " I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy ".

 

[Eddy]

If a person is a non-believer be patient, be courageous while trying to convince her or him with words of truth. If no results are found, let go because that person might probably not have been chosen before the foundation of the world. This is not for everyone. That is why there is a trap. Remember God said " I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy ". One important thing I have discovered is that salvation is for the children of the covenant of God (the true believer). It is the way it is.

 

[Lyta137]

would you ever date a non-believer? What is this person is someone you have been dating since before you were saved? What is this person is genuinely a good person who treats you right and respects your new found beliefs?

doubt it........

 

[Eddy]

For the past 14 years, I have done extensive explorations, researches, experiments with God while reading his words. I have discovered books, chapters and verses missing from the original bible such as : The book of Enoch, The book of the secrets of Enoch which the devil has taken off the bible ( from both the old and New Testament ) to fool the children of God. If we do not have true connection with other believers through the spirit of God ( Jehovah, the only true God ), we are in deep confusions which will eventually lead to complete disaster. That is exactly why God always distributes portions of his spirit to all the children of the covenant, children of Zion ( the chosen ones which are called the body of Christ in the last day with Jesus, Michael, The King of Kings or Prince of peace) so that he can guide them directly by his spirit. And there is babylon, the world or children of the devil. It is all part of grand destiny and mysterious plan of God because he knew the end from the beginning. He wants to uses this entire scenario that has been going on for thousands of years the teach things about himself that no being would understand unless revealed through demonstrations in a universe of galaxies, planets and other creatures of different types. This True God is just bigger than time and space, a level that no one can imagine. That is why eternity is needed to learn about God and that is the gift that is given all children he determines to be worthy.
That is why the people of God are not comfortable sharing life with children of darkness who do not understand the big universal picture.

 

[Eddy]

I would like to tell any chosen one not to worry about anything because it has all been predetermined. To find out, you just have to read Romans 8 vs 28-39 and Romans 9 vs 6-24, John 17 and Mark 10 vs 35-40.
You were just appointed unto salvation through Christ because you are not the children of wrath. 1 Thessalonians 5 vs 9-11. Amen. Just praise the name of God and thank him through Jesus Christ for this favor and love Jesus, your king and savior.
What I would like to say is that another chosen must be appointed in your life in order for you to have a happy relationship. Some people call it soulmate because God knows exactly what your match should be.

 

[Arwen4CJ]

What I would like to say is that another chosen must be appointed in your life in order for you to have a happy relationship. Some people call it soulmate because God knows exactly what your match should be.

The term "soulmate" is actually an occult/New Age concept.

Sure, Christians do use the term to mean something different, but we should probably use a different term.

 

[ServantStrike]

The term "soulmate" is actually an occult/New Age concept.

Sure, Christians do use the term to mean something different, but we should probably use a different term.

We should start calling them our special someponies.

Or cutie-petotty-lovey-dovey-honeybun works too.

[video=youtube;RqTXg_qPR-4]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqTXg_qPR-4[/video]


That's right. I went there.

 

[Grace-Like-Rain]

We should start calling them our special someponies.

Or cutie-petotty-lovey-dovey-honeybun works too.

[video=youtube;RqTXg_qPR-4]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqTXg_qPR-4[/video]


That's right. I went there.

I actually... watched three of these episodes today.