What should I think of this?

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tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,450
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Tennessee
#21
Sorry tourist, this one wen't completely over my head. Could you explain:)
You mentioned something about 2 1/2 boxes of Kleenex and the flu and that you feel better. I feel better too after giving certain things to God that did not belong in my life. Yes, I know that this has nothing to do with Kleenex or the flu, it was just my amusing way of explaining certain matters.
 

SoulWeaver

Senior Member
Oct 25, 2014
4,889
2,534
113
#22
I see only one problem with this thought you have and that is Her heart is really wrapped up into this guy and if she continues to talk and chat with him it only leads to more heart ache down the road....Been there done that and at 60 I have had a few trial runs..... If I can help spare a young ones heart then so be it. God certainly knows my intentions are good toward her....Not all of the young listen though and have to have a few broken heart experiences to become the skeptic that I was for 35 years..... It is up to butterfly as to which path she will travel we each have to make our own mistakes.....or victories which ever way they turn out.
Not sure you understood me well, I did not mean she should literally text him. I probably I went more jokeingly about it than I wanted in my post because I've seen a lot of vanity in relationships, thankfully more by observing people than my own experience. I wanted to make sure she's not hurt by some vain guy and to just laugh it off in case he is like that.

I did not really carefully read into all that caretaker stuff, idk what all that means and I've just came from work so please dont mind me... Point that I got was the following: he goes somewhere for some reason, they cant see one another often, he doesnt want her to wait for him although she is willing, then when told this no yay reaction (which would have been there if he was as serious), but instead keeps his lukewarm attitude... I get from this that he is not as dedicated as her to maintain this relationship. But again there might be details that we dont know. She should definitely openly talk with him.
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#23
Rather getting feedback from others? were you may get some negative comebacks and what they think that may be wrong, the sensible thing to do is to ask your bf what did he mean by what he had said.
THANK YOU! I respect people's opinions here, though it seems as though they're coming from a rather personal place. Subjective advice on this might do more harm than good.
 
J

Jacob_Fitzgerald

Guest
#24
Thanks for explaining tourist:)

I was trying to find something amusing and funny to say in return, but my head is kind of full of this other stuff right now;)
 
May 3, 2013
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#25
Not sure you understood me well, I did not mean she should literally text him. I probably I went more jokeingly about it than I wanted in my post because I've seen a lot of vanity in relationships, thankfully more by observing people than my own experience. I wanted to make sure she's not hurt by some vain guy and to just laugh it off in case he is like that.

I did not really carefully read into all that caretaker stuff, idk what all that means and I've just came from work so please dont mind me... Point that I got was the following: he goes somewhere for some reason, they cant see one another often, he doesnt want her to wait for him although she is willing, then when told this no yay reaction (which would have been there if he was as serious), but instead keeps his lukewarm attitude... I get from this that he is not as dedicated as her to maintain this relationship. But again there might be details that we dont know. She should definitely openly talk with him.
Relationships or faked ones (a lot of vanity in relationships) whatever thing these things are, they are felt, thought, wanted, stubbornly sought and dully observed and, certain times, that "vanities" are better than nothing, particularly when a person is alone, single, etc.

The important thing to remember was said like this, to both genders:

“The maddest thing a man can do in this life is to let himself die.”
― Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote
 
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SoulWeaver

Senior Member
Oct 25, 2014
4,889
2,534
113
#26
You're totally right, secularhermit.
My first thought was "do not let her get hurt!". I really like preventing hurt so much that sometimes I forget the big picture.
Our focus should be somewhat different than that.
Hate them emotional kneejerk reactions...
 
J

jkalyna

Guest
#27
Relationships or faked ones (a lot of vanity in relationships) whatever thing these things are, they are felt, thought, wanted, stubbornly sought and dully observed and, certain times, that "vanities" are better than nothing, particularly when a person is alone, single, etc.

The important thing to remember was said like this, to both genders:

“The maddest thing a man can do in this life is to let himself die.”
― Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote
*faked relationships, hmm you are right though, sometimes a female could be a little*neeve*and vulnerable, or just dumb. This is a good thing to remember. There are tons of people who do fake relationships, called con artists, doing something to get something, and are not sincere. You need to see what people are all about first lesson I learned, thanks for a man's insight of this. Down to earth honestly, :)
 
May 3, 2013
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#28
You're totally right, secularhermit.
My first thought was "do not let her get hurt!". I really like preventing hurt so much that sometimes I forget the big picture.
Our focus should be somewhat different than that.
Hate them emotional kneejerk reactions...
I know you are protective, my dear unicorn. you said correctly, but she´s seeking some feedback and CC gave it well, as usual (and we don´t know the big pic).

You are the type of persons I´d like to have my own country.
 
J

jkalyna

Guest
#29
Rather getting feedback from others? were you may get some negative comebacks and what they think that may be wrong, the sensible thing to do is to ask your bf what did he mean by what he had said.
*YOu know I found out that when I get stressed, I say words, and not good ones. Some people grab a smoke, or what ever rocks the boat, but later and I mean like a few minutes later I feel like horrible, and repent, and ask forgiveness from God, and who ever I vented on. Sometimes people could get the*wrong*picture at first of someone, if there in a situation that is not comfortable, and they react, but not how they really are, but from a stimuli of someone's aggressive conduct, or*environment. So I like to cultivate the fruits of the HOly Spirit.
 
May 3, 2013
8,719
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#30
*faked relationships, hmm you are right though, sometimes a female could be a little*neeve*and vulnerable, or just dumb. This is a good thing to remember. There are tons of people who do fake relationships, called con artists, doing something to get something, and are not sincere. You need to see what people are all about first lesson I learned, thanks for a man's insight of this. Down to earth honestly, :)
That´s my sheriff!

Where´ve you been? I missed you (I just remembered you, these days, when I tried to find out a picture of wine moving like that you once showed, moving, in .gif format).

:p
 
May 3, 2013
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#31
Ha! Ha! Ha!

PS

(Phsssss! this is for a nice woman I know is "hidden"...)

If I´m there, above or somewhere (below), my wings looked like a dried leaf (too short and torn).

:p
 

Trailblazer

Senior Member
Sep 8, 2014
432
30
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#32
Sounds to me as if he may be the type of guy that feels he is the Bad guy if he is the one that breaks up in a relationship resulting in hurting his GF feelings. This type of behavior may be when there is no flat out deal breaker going on in the relationship.

To get to the truth. A long heart to heart conversation needs to take place. Pick his brain of what he likes, doesn't like, and what may not be working for him in the relationship. The goal is to have him comfortable enough that he can speak the truth. Give him every opportunity to get out of the relationship if that is his wish. Hopefully he will have the man jewels if that is his wish.
 
B

butterfly712

Guest
#33
Thank you for all the feedback everyone,I talked to my bf last night and he asked me if I still wanted to be with him,I said yes,we are still together,and he was even telling me about in the future of us moving and living together,he has a job oppertinuity in a different state,I have never wanted to be with anyone else but him,and he has never wanted to be with anyone else but me.
 
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jkalyna

Guest
#34
That´s my sheriff!

Where´ve you been? I missed you (I just remembered you, these days, when I tried to find out a picture of wine moving like that you once showed, moving, in .gif format).

:p
*Where have I been? I've been to hell and back. Hell a place of darkness, and sometimes our*thoughts*carry us there, hell a place of temptations, hell a place of*discouragement, and hell a place of*emptiness, so I moved from one place to another, but need to move some thoughts out, and get them out of my mind for ever. L O L *:) I'm going to look for that wine picture, but for now, I'm going to get some coffee, and not from Chile either. American kind. Lol.*
 

Trailblazer

Senior Member
Sep 8, 2014
432
30
18
#35
Thank you for all the feedback everyone,I talked to my bf last night and he asked me if I still wanted to be with him,I said yes,we are still together,and he was even telling me about in the future of us moving and living together,he has a job oppertinuity in a different state,I have never wanted to be with anyone else but him,and he has never wanted to be with anyone else but me.
Glad its working out for you. If you think you may want to marry him one day. Living together may hinder that outcome for you. Due to the fact he may be getting everything he wants from you without being married. Tough to expect blessing from the Lord if your not in compliance with Gods word also.
Just some things to ponder as your moving ahead in your relationship. :)
Good luck and God bless.