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I
It all feels like that crazy Jet Li film "The One"..but with less killing & time travel.
I think God has given us the free will to decide whom we should be with. He's also given us a sound mind,and His Spirit.
I can't say if there's one particular person God wants up to be with & if we don't end up with them,then He just throws his hands up & rolls His eyes like,"smooth move exlax...now what am I gonna do with you?"
All I know based on my previous dealings with marriage/love/dating...
It's that I know nothing. lol
Thank God He know's my needs even more than I think I do.
I think God has given us the free will to decide whom we should be with. He's also given us a sound mind,and His Spirit.
I can't say if there's one particular person God wants up to be with & if we don't end up with them,then He just throws his hands up & rolls His eyes like,"smooth move exlax...now what am I gonna do with you?"
All I know based on my previous dealings with marriage/love/dating...
It's that I know nothing. lol
Thank God He know's my needs even more than I think I do.
B
Well, considering God never makes mistakes, if God had someone specific for individual saints to marry, then there would be no divorce occurrence among the saints, but divorce is real, and sin fuels divorce.
Let us not confuse that staying married to "one specific" spouse is required by God as long as both parties consent to an exclusive married life between them. In other words, God does not require a spouse to remain married when the other spouse has defile the holy vows of marriage.
I believe there exist several behaviors that make several folks compatible. Usually those finding value in Reformed Baptist thought are compatible with me, for example, whereas Catholics do not favor me, and Charismatics find me overly sedated. LOL
Let us not confuse that staying married to "one specific" spouse is required by God as long as both parties consent to an exclusive married life between them. In other words, God does not require a spouse to remain married when the other spouse has defile the holy vows of marriage.
I believe there exist several behaviors that make several folks compatible. Usually those finding value in Reformed Baptist thought are compatible with me, for example, whereas Catholics do not favor me, and Charismatics find me overly sedated. LOL
I don't believe a person should marry without praying very strongly about it and asking God to either give them peace to move on to marriage or to trouble their heart about it to end it. I believe that's why so many people end up divorced, because they take it upon themselves without the ok from God.
S
In high school I can't tell you how many men and women I talked about who were looking for a soul mate, especially Christians. They espoused the whole soulmate concept. Some of them were dating and said they had found their soul mate.
Several of them, including the most successful couples (who lived a Godly life and cared for each other genuinely, at least as well as still maturing teenagers can), ended up drifting apart.
That kind of blew the concept apart for me. I never believed it for an instant as I went through a patch where every girl I got interested in in high school was either taken or I wasn't suave enough to make them interested in me.
And the soul mate thing is destructive I think because it sets people up for a "he (or she) will come to me because God will show him (or her) to me." A spouse is not a deliery from Federal Express. You have to put yourself out there and look. And you have to say yes to a date with someone to see how much you have in common. Other than some initial attraction, feelings take time to develop. Looking for some crazy bolt from the blue straight to the heart saying "this is the one" is unrealistic.
Several of them, including the most successful couples (who lived a Godly life and cared for each other genuinely, at least as well as still maturing teenagers can), ended up drifting apart.
That kind of blew the concept apart for me. I never believed it for an instant as I went through a patch where every girl I got interested in in high school was either taken or I wasn't suave enough to make them interested in me.
And the soul mate thing is destructive I think because it sets people up for a "he (or she) will come to me because God will show him (or her) to me." A spouse is not a deliery from Federal Express. You have to put yourself out there and look. And you have to say yes to a date with someone to see how much you have in common. Other than some initial attraction, feelings take time to develop. Looking for some crazy bolt from the blue straight to the heart saying "this is the one" is unrealistic.
I keep coming back to this and thinking about it. Even if God DOES have someone specific in mind for some of us (which sometimes he does - ie Mary and Joseph, Esther, many more) that doesn't mean that those people won't sin or divorce. Just because my marriage ended in divorce doesn't mean God didn't have a plan for my life which included my ex-husband. (I hope this makes sense. It made sense when I was thinking it. LOL)
I don't believe in "soul mates" but I do believe that God has a hand in who we marry, just as he plays a part in all of our major life situations.
I don't believe in "soul mates" but I do believe that God has a hand in who we marry, just as he plays a part in all of our major life situations.
J
Makes sense to me, Grace.
God may have someone in mind for us, but we may choose to be with someone else and/or one party in the relationship may not include Him in the decision making process. That choice can lead to a divorce for a believer just as easily as for a nonbeliever, especially when you consider there are two of you making choices. Those choices don't always mesh.
God has His best in mind for us in EVERY area of our lives, but we don't always choose to walk that path, do we? Even so, He is still able to work ALL things together for good for those who are His...just as His Word has said, even our decisions to enter into wrong relationships.
But we can CHOOSE to learn from those wrong decisions and CHOOSE to remember the good we saw even in the wrong person. Just because someone is wrong for us, it doesn't mean they are a bad person. They might be very right for someone else.
God may have someone in mind for us, but we may choose to be with someone else and/or one party in the relationship may not include Him in the decision making process. That choice can lead to a divorce for a believer just as easily as for a nonbeliever, especially when you consider there are two of you making choices. Those choices don't always mesh.
God has His best in mind for us in EVERY area of our lives, but we don't always choose to walk that path, do we? Even so, He is still able to work ALL things together for good for those who are His...just as His Word has said, even our decisions to enter into wrong relationships.
But we can CHOOSE to learn from those wrong decisions and CHOOSE to remember the good we saw even in the wrong person. Just because someone is wrong for us, it doesn't mean they are a bad person. They might be very right for someone else.
N
No, No i just have no idea what you were trying to say. It sounded like an incomplete thought. Or maybe the lack of sleep is finally catching up to me....
Anyway
An actual conversation i had with my mother.
My mom: I know who your husband is!
Me: Oh yeah?
My mom: YES! God gave me a vision! He's tall.... and he has dark hair!!
Me:seriously Donna............ (I call her by her first name when she's out of her mind)
My mom: Yes! He's tall with dark hair and you looked so happy with him!
Me: ................................
I mean you really can't argue with crazy...
There are a a million people on planet earth who are tall with dark hair, so now i just have to go find that ONE person in one million God meant for me that is tall with dark hair AND makes me happy....
That whole idea is just so........ stupid. (I'm tired, stupid is fanciest word i could come up with)
I would say more, but i can't remember where i was going with this.
So to recap
My moms crazy
If your tall with dark hair, we need to talk
Thing's are stupid.
Anyway
An actual conversation i had with my mother.
My mom: I know who your husband is!
Me: Oh yeah?
My mom: YES! God gave me a vision! He's tall.... and he has dark hair!!
Me:seriously Donna............ (I call her by her first name when she's out of her mind)
My mom: Yes! He's tall with dark hair and you looked so happy with him!
Me: ................................
I mean you really can't argue with crazy...
There are a a million people on planet earth who are tall with dark hair, so now i just have to go find that ONE person in one million God meant for me that is tall with dark hair AND makes me happy....
That whole idea is just so........ stupid. (I'm tired, stupid is fanciest word i could come up with)
I would say more, but i can't remember where i was going with this.
So to recap
My moms crazy
If your tall with dark hair, we need to talk
Thing's are stupid.
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U
How? This was a one time, specific event. There is nothing at all to indicate that this is an example for future generations. It was a creation event. If we were to use the logic that this even is intended as evidence that people are specifically set apart for another person, then we should also conclude incest is acceptable, since incest was the only way to populate the earth in the beginning. But yet the bible does speak against incest.
This is just another example of people taking scripture out of context, or for some people, twisting it out of context to support the view they already have established.
S
The needle in the haystack saying does not for me because God is infinite and he can do anything, but you could say that people do not have a particular helpmate and it is our choice. However, the Lord told me several things that turned out be true. So in my case yes I believe the person I will married will be destined by God. It all depends on his plan for your life, if you marry the wrong person it will mess up God's plan. Perfect example, suppose you are called to be a missionary in Asia, however you marry someone whom is to be a pastor in America. How will your relationship stand if you both have completely different life purposes, so choosing at random does not always work for all.
M
I don't mean to be argumentative here, but I was wondering about that...how can any human being "mess up" God's- GOD'S- plan?
I mean...we can mess up within God's plan for us, sure. We can mess up our own lives pretty darn good, and most of us do, to some extent. But in the end...God's will is done. Nothing we do can "ruin" or "mess up" His plan.
I just feel like it's really sort of...I dunno, conceited, maybe?...to think we can throw a wrench into God's perfect plan, and mess it up so badly that the result He had intended is null and void. We might fight Him, we might take a more difficult route, we might make a bazillion poor decisions on the way, but if we are truly saved, don't we eventually get where God was leading us?
I think a lot of the time, people's mistakes ARE part of God's plan, anyway- because mistakes humble us and teach us and often take us closer to the Lord than we were before we stumbled and shot off like a rocket in the wrong direction. Sometimes, without going the wrong way, it's hard for us to see what the right way even is.
I married the wrong person the first time around. I am positive that my first marriage was not God's ultimate plan for my life. But I didn't mess up that plan by marrying the wrong person- I hurt myself, and my ex-husband, and a handful of other people, and God was probably up in Heaven shaking His head and facepalming at me...
Anyway, all that is a big reason why I don't believe that there is just one specific person out there for each and every one of us. If that was true, that everyone had a single someone out there, then YES, by all means, we'd all be screwing up God's plan left and right. As it is, I think that some people DO have a specific person they are "meant" for, while some of us could be happy with a wide variety of other people in a marriage- once we are married to a person, however, I feel it is largely our responsibility to not only make said person our "one", but also to become that person's "one"- and still other people aren't meant for marriage at all.
I honestly have no idea if any of that makes any sense.
But I tried...I tried.
I mean...we can mess up within God's plan for us, sure. We can mess up our own lives pretty darn good, and most of us do, to some extent. But in the end...God's will is done. Nothing we do can "ruin" or "mess up" His plan.
I just feel like it's really sort of...I dunno, conceited, maybe?...to think we can throw a wrench into God's perfect plan, and mess it up so badly that the result He had intended is null and void. We might fight Him, we might take a more difficult route, we might make a bazillion poor decisions on the way, but if we are truly saved, don't we eventually get where God was leading us?
I think a lot of the time, people's mistakes ARE part of God's plan, anyway- because mistakes humble us and teach us and often take us closer to the Lord than we were before we stumbled and shot off like a rocket in the wrong direction. Sometimes, without going the wrong way, it's hard for us to see what the right way even is.
I married the wrong person the first time around. I am positive that my first marriage was not God's ultimate plan for my life. But I didn't mess up that plan by marrying the wrong person- I hurt myself, and my ex-husband, and a handful of other people, and God was probably up in Heaven shaking His head and facepalming at me...
Anyway, all that is a big reason why I don't believe that there is just one specific person out there for each and every one of us. If that was true, that everyone had a single someone out there, then YES, by all means, we'd all be screwing up God's plan left and right. As it is, I think that some people DO have a specific person they are "meant" for, while some of us could be happy with a wide variety of other people in a marriage- once we are married to a person, however, I feel it is largely our responsibility to not only make said person our "one", but also to become that person's "one"- and still other people aren't meant for marriage at all.
I honestly have no idea if any of that makes any sense.
But I tried...I tried.
S
Maybe the statement mess up should not have been used, I was just stating certain people are called to do certain things for the kingdom of God. And that being said , I do not believe you mess up God's plan because God know every choice you will make before you make it. Our choices we make bad or good all have a purpose, be it for us to grow whatever it may be . For instant I am a child of a third marriage. I still believe there is a particular person for me, not saying another person can choose whom they could marry, either way God already knew the choices we would make so in a way God already chose your helpmate. God create circumstances that bring certain circumstances to bring such people together, just sometimes we know in advance and other time we can see a clear picture. So I have nothing against what you said, you are right again about the mess up statement. Thanks for letting me clarify this.