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S
Hal51, as each women is unique and our past experiences along with our upbringing shape the individual we are.
I'm only guessing here
i) but it could have happened because this women in her past relationships has experienced an unfaithful and disloyal partner therefore her reaction is tied up with the hurt past she made have endured.
ii) She may not have sorted out her emotional baggage properly and therefore is carrying around an emotional suitcase that needs repacking and downsizing.
iii) She may just be one of those women who sees all other woman as a threat.
I would also assume if this relationship became more serious those female friends would then become her friends as well.
I'm only guessing here
i) but it could have happened because this women in her past relationships has experienced an unfaithful and disloyal partner therefore her reaction is tied up with the hurt past she made have endured.
ii) She may not have sorted out her emotional baggage properly and therefore is carrying around an emotional suitcase that needs repacking and downsizing.
iii) She may just be one of those women who sees all other woman as a threat.
I would also assume if this relationship became more serious those female friends would then become her friends as well.
K
I'm jumping in, so feel free to join me Ugly.
Regardless of gender, some people feel that the only other person you need in your life should be them. That may eventually be the case, but that is after you have made the commitment of marriage. After that, there are different schools of thought. If wether you choose to keep friends of the opposite sex or not, you will DEFINITELY need to have an honest talk about your different points of view. It won't work if she demands that you drop all female friends and then won't provide the relationship you had with them. For example, you like to play video games, and she isn't a gamer, she will either need to learn or allow you to continue such friendships.
Regardless of the activity, you will need to establish some boundaries that you BOTH agree to like, never being alone with other women. They are welcome to come over as long as she is there and must leave when she goes to bed. She must be allowed access to all of your communications. These are just a few of examples.
Right now though, feel free to explain to her why you want the women friends in your life, and then allow her to explain why it bothers her. ("You should know why" is unexceptable) If you can't come to an understanding, I think you have your answer what to do next.
Regardless of gender, some people feel that the only other person you need in your life should be them. That may eventually be the case, but that is after you have made the commitment of marriage. After that, there are different schools of thought. If wether you choose to keep friends of the opposite sex or not, you will DEFINITELY need to have an honest talk about your different points of view. It won't work if she demands that you drop all female friends and then won't provide the relationship you had with them. For example, you like to play video games, and she isn't a gamer, she will either need to learn or allow you to continue such friendships.
Regardless of the activity, you will need to establish some boundaries that you BOTH agree to like, never being alone with other women. They are welcome to come over as long as she is there and must leave when she goes to bed. She must be allowed access to all of your communications. These are just a few of examples.
Right now though, feel free to explain to her why you want the women friends in your life, and then allow her to explain why it bothers her. ("You should know why" is unexceptable) If you can't come to an understanding, I think you have your answer what to do next.
K
Actually, couldn't OMG stand for "oh my gosh," oh my goodness," "on my grave," "only my gal," etc.
That is why I've never been a fan of abbreviations, it leaves YOUR meaning to the interpretation of the audience.
Isn't this why some Christians hesitate to come on CC and share? They fear that they will be condemned for something they say. He made the effort NOT to actually use the Lord's name in vain. We really DON't know what he meant except to express frustration. Can we just leave this one for God to judge?
(psst, Hal51, I'm sure that you are now aware of how it offends others to use that abbreviation. I'm sure you will NEVER forget to NOT use that abbreviation or any others on CC. I know I won't. I'm sure that I would have made that same mistake eventually, but thank you for bringing it out so we could openly discuss it.)
Now shake hands.
What the $&@€£¥*^#%!
That is why I've never been a fan of abbreviations, it leaves YOUR meaning to the interpretation of the audience.
Isn't this why some Christians hesitate to come on CC and share? They fear that they will be condemned for something they say. He made the effort NOT to actually use the Lord's name in vain. We really DON't know what he meant except to express frustration. Can we just leave this one for God to judge?
(psst, Hal51, I'm sure that you are now aware of how it offends others to use that abbreviation. I'm sure you will NEVER forget to NOT use that abbreviation or any others on CC. I know I won't. I'm sure that I would have made that same mistake eventually, but thank you for bringing it out so we could openly discuss it.)
Now shake hands.
What the $&@€£¥*^#%!
D
... Exactly the reaction I get when I make a comment about the use of that acronym in chat. But come on, we both know what it actually means, no need to make things more complicated than they are. It's so simple, if you know there are brothers and sisters who find such an expression offensive, just don't use it.
Jealousy typically stems from two things: pride and/or insecurity. Pride tells us, "Why are they hanging out with THEM when I'm much better and they should be hanging out with me?" Insecurity tells us, "Of course he's talking to other girls, look how pitiful I am. Why would he want to talk to me?" or "The last guy cheated on me, so this one must be, too." Both are root issues that will need to be addressed, eventually. A relationship isn't very fun or healthy when one is always questioning the other.
New relationships can also tend to have that twinge of jealousy until each are comfortable with each other and have built that trust.
That said, when you (general you, not directed at you Hal51) are in a relationship, you do have to be careful about how and how much you interact with other females. Having female friends while you're in a relationship is not wrong in and of itself, but it is something that you have to check yourself on. Same goes for females being friends with males while in a relationship. There may be some things you have to change.
New relationships can also tend to have that twinge of jealousy until each are comfortable with each other and have built that trust.
That said, when you (general you, not directed at you Hal51) are in a relationship, you do have to be careful about how and how much you interact with other females. Having female friends while you're in a relationship is not wrong in and of itself, but it is something that you have to check yourself on. Same goes for females being friends with males while in a relationship. There may be some things you have to change.
R
Hal, I think there was a huge issue regarding her past for her to act on impulse like so. In fairness, what people are not noticing, she did apologise to you, whether she meant it or not, she did. So obviously now, so will be tormented by it. People will react quick to certain things, which relates to something of there past. and will say, or do once something has triggered it off. You, not knowingly, triggered that something to act on impulse.
My advise don't have anything against her, don't be angry with her, perhaps try send her a bunch of flowers or chocolates or something to try ease her state. and perhaps, maybe listen to her, if she wants to open up. sometimes it could be a cry of help to just to talk to someone about her experience. Call her for a coffee and just tell her that you are there if she wants to talk. and leave it at that. Pray about it. pray for her, and pray that God will give you right words to say of encouragement.
For all you know she may be the one for you. Just because she has problems, don't mean she is not right? Just maybe need some time to get rid of the things that's niggling at her. Step back a little. at least then you would shown her that not all men are alike. and hopefully she will notice that different approach.
And did is notice a little blaspheme in the beginning of the thread? lol God bless.
My advise don't have anything against her, don't be angry with her, perhaps try send her a bunch of flowers or chocolates or something to try ease her state. and perhaps, maybe listen to her, if she wants to open up. sometimes it could be a cry of help to just to talk to someone about her experience. Call her for a coffee and just tell her that you are there if she wants to talk. and leave it at that. Pray about it. pray for her, and pray that God will give you right words to say of encouragement.
For all you know she may be the one for you. Just because she has problems, don't mean she is not right? Just maybe need some time to get rid of the things that's niggling at her. Step back a little. at least then you would shown her that not all men are alike. and hopefully she will notice that different approach.
And did is notice a little blaspheme in the beginning of the thread? lol God bless.