never had a gf. don't see much hope of ever getting one. any suggestions?
- Thread starter Arcynaculr
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When you want a person in your life sooo bad........ to devote yourself to them, to spend all your time with them, to love them, to have someone to take away the pain, to make you feel complete, to bring you happiness, to meet needs in your life......... you're not just looking fo a person....... you're looking for a god.
Why not? Two depressed people can help each other. ive done it before. i had a friend. we were both depressed. we both helped each other feel better. they got completely over their depression. i didnt. they didnt wanna be my friend anymore. i didnt think they were such an ungrateful, uncaring, selfish person. i thought they were better than that. i guess i was wrong.
But the point is 2 depressed people can help each other. ever since they left ive been even more depressed. Ive had a few nondepressed friends... they never helped me feel as much better as my depressed friend did.
We could talk to each other about our feelings and understand each other... no "emotionally healthy" person wanted to be our friend. all we had was each other. and that was all we needed. and this friend was a girl. and we were almost more than friends. but then i helped her feel better to the point where she was no longer depressed... but then she didnt need me anymore... i found out that she didnt really care about me... she just cared about how i made her feel and since she didnt need me to feel help her feel better anymore, she left.
If she just would have actually cared about me like i cared about her... she would have stayed... and maybe i would have eventually gotten better too... but she didnt really care...
But the problem was not that either of us was depressed. the problem was she just didnt care.
But the point is 2 depressed people can help each other. ever since they left ive been even more depressed. Ive had a few nondepressed friends... they never helped me feel as much better as my depressed friend did.
We could talk to each other about our feelings and understand each other... no "emotionally healthy" person wanted to be our friend. all we had was each other. and that was all we needed. and this friend was a girl. and we were almost more than friends. but then i helped her feel better to the point where she was no longer depressed... but then she didnt need me anymore... i found out that she didnt really care about me... she just cared about how i made her feel and since she didnt need me to feel help her feel better anymore, she left.
If she just would have actually cared about me like i cared about her... she would have stayed... and maybe i would have eventually gotten better too... but she didnt really care...
But the problem was not that either of us was depressed. the problem was she just didnt care.
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Matthew 10:37-39 [SUP]37 [/SUP]He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. [SUP]38 [/SUP]And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. [SUP]39 [/SUP]He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.
Luke 14:26-33 [SUP]26 [/SUP]If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. [SUP]27 [/SUP]And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple. [SUP]28 [/SUP]For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it? [SUP]29 [/SUP]Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it, all that behold it begin to mock him, [SUP]30 [/SUP]Saying, This man began to build, and was not able to finish. [SUP]31 [/SUP]Or what king, going to make war against another king, sitteth not down first, and consulteth whether he be able with ten thousand to meet him that cometh against him with twenty thousand? [SUP]32 [/SUP]Or else, while the other is yet a great way off, he sendeth an ambassage, and desireth conditions of peace. [SUP]33 [/SUP]So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple.
I think these verses tell us a lot about ourselves, & about what/who God honors.
Luke 14:26-33 [SUP]26 [/SUP]If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. [SUP]27 [/SUP]And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple. [SUP]28 [/SUP]For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it? [SUP]29 [/SUP]Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it, all that behold it begin to mock him, [SUP]30 [/SUP]Saying, This man began to build, and was not able to finish. [SUP]31 [/SUP]Or what king, going to make war against another king, sitteth not down first, and consulteth whether he be able with ten thousand to meet him that cometh against him with twenty thousand? [SUP]32 [/SUP]Or else, while the other is yet a great way off, he sendeth an ambassage, and desireth conditions of peace. [SUP]33 [/SUP]So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple.
I think these verses tell us a lot about ourselves, & about what/who God honors.
see this is exactly what I am talking about - She get's over her depression - you don't - she sees your depression as a vortex to make her go back into it
If you want recovery - you have to seek it apart from a intimate relationship
I would suggest a peer support specialist - usually they are at mental health facilities, have gone through recovery of their own depression, and seek to help other's
i wanted to do that so bad, but I refused the treatment the VA hospital had, and sought my own recovery
If you want recovery - you have to seek it apart from a intimate relationship
I would suggest a peer support specialist - usually they are at mental health facilities, have gone through recovery of their own depression, and seek to help other's
i wanted to do that so bad, but I refused the treatment the VA hospital had, and sought my own recovery
It seems to me like your issue is that a certain girl you found attractive rejected you therefore you are questioning what's wrong with you. Think about this though, maybe nothing is wrong with you, something could be wrong with her, maybe nothing is wrong with her and maybe just you too aren't well suited for eachother, perhaps some unknown factor besides you weighed on her judgement anything from parents, school, work, stress, possible affairs of her own, maybe even just had one bad day, etc.
I liked your example of two friends helping eachother just by talking to eachother, that has happened to me many times and I am glad to knwo the many people I know despite their flaws. I'm still young so you are certainly still young, perhaps you should not focus on finding your woman just yet. Maybe you should look towards just making more regular friends with good people that you can talk to and have fun with in your community.
I liked your example of two friends helping eachother just by talking to eachother, that has happened to me many times and I am glad to knwo the many people I know despite their flaws. I'm still young so you are certainly still young, perhaps you should not focus on finding your woman just yet. Maybe you should look towards just making more regular friends with good people that you can talk to and have fun with in your community.
I dont like associating with multiple people... i like to concentrate on one person. So i figure its best if that one person can be more than a friend.
only reason im on here talking to you all is cuz i dont have anyone to concentrate on... if i did, i would just talk to them right now.
I cant help it, its just who i am.
only reason im on here talking to you all is cuz i dont have anyone to concentrate on... if i did, i would just talk to them right now.
I cant help it, its just who i am.
I guess if you are going to hang out on a Christian chat site you may as well hear Christian truth.
John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Proverbs 18:24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
That friend is Jesus
John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Proverbs 18:24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
That friend is Jesus