The changing of the light bulb

[BugeyeSTi]

You know how many Irishmen it takes to change a light bulb? 2...One to get a ladder and hold the light bulb, the second to drink till the room starts spinning.

 

[Charcoal]

SURREALISTS: Fish

 

[Gandalf]

God doesn't need any light bulbs as He can just say - Let there be light.

Iei aur...

 

[zeroturbulence]

I prefer LED's

Because you never have to change them (at least not for about 20 years)..

 

[JesusLives]

TEENS: Only One. They simply hold the bulb and the universe revolved around them, so it magically screws itself into the socket.


IN THE CHURCH AUDITORIUM: Five, plus some observers typically.
The auditorium at my church was designed without planning for maintenance. Scissors lifts are too short to reach nearly all the bulbs. Fortunately, the fire station one block over has a ladder that Almost reaches nearly every bulb. So one of the members who happens to work at that station goes and borrows the ladder...and then the fun begins. We tie the middle or two very long ropes to the top of the ladder, which leaves four equal lengths of rope hanging off. then four men stand back and apply enough tension to hold the ladder perfectly still while sticking straight up in the air leaning against nothing. The fireman-church member climbs the ladder and changes the bulb. For the ones that he can't reach, be sits on the top rung, locks his legs in from opposite directions, then uses one of those telescoping poles with the special widget for changing light bulbs they sell. You can see how this would be worth watching.

Blond......Me thinks I get it now.....call the hunky fireman and let them bring a tall ladder and let hunky fireman change the light bulbs in my tall hall.....Thanks for a real solution I can enjoy.....What is it they call that? Oh Yeah eye candy....lol

 

[JesusLives]

This is a really GREAT THREAD Lynx..... As I think I see the light......lol

 

[JesusLives]

Yay! I'm useful!

Since they're 12 years old, if you only used them 3 hours a week, they'd be due if they are incandescent bulbs.

They're uhh... probably due. Go LED this time (I recommend Cree), and you should be good for 20-50 years (no joke).

As for the top rung of a ladder, just convince someone else to do it... that always works.

Thanks for your advise, however, Blond thinks she will wait until at least one of the two bulbs really bites the dust, (burns out), before calling the hunky fireman with his tall ladder.... As said Blond is now interested in just how long these light bulbs will continue to burn bright.... I am truly amazed they have lasted this long......and now have probably jinxed it since talking about it out loud.......or really in type on a screen.......No, I'm not superstitious at all......lol

 

[blue_ladybug]

Blond......Me thinks I get it now.....call the hunky fireman and let them bring a tall ladder and let hunky fireman change the light bulbs in my tall hall.....Thanks for a real solution I can enjoy.....What is it they call that? Oh Yeah eye candy....lol

​hey now, you already got a man!! Give ME the hunky firemen!! whoo hoooo!!!

 

[Lynx]

This is a really GREAT THREAD Lynx..... As I think I see the light......lol

Well you oughta see it, it's shining from the top of your own avatar.

Praaaaaaise de Lawd, I saw da light!

 

[Lynx]

You know how many Irishmen it takes to change a light bulb? 2...One to get a ladder and hold the light bulb, the second to drink till the room starts spinning.

Not all irishmen are drunks... but since you brought up the stereotype, might as well have a bit of fun with it.

"You mean the first one has to stay SOBER?! You said nothing about him getting a drink."

 

[JesusLives]

Iei aur...

I don't speak your language I speak Blond can you translate for me? Please?

 

[Oncefallen]

IN THE CHURCH AUDITORIUM: Five, plus some observers typically.
The auditorium at my church was designed without planning for maintenance. Scissors lifts are too short to reach nearly all the bulbs. Fortunately, the fire station one block over has a ladder that Almost reaches nearly every bulb. So one of the members who happens to work at that station goes and borrows the ladder...and then the fun begins. We tie the middle or two very long ropes to the top of the ladder, which leaves four equal lengths of rope hanging off. then four men stand back and apply enough tension to hold the ladder perfectly still while sticking straight up in the air leaning against nothing. The fireman-church member climbs the ladder and changes the bulb. For the ones that he can't reach, be sits on the top rung, locks his legs in from opposite directions, then uses one of those telescoping poles with the special widget for changing light bulbs they sell. You can see how this would be worth watching.

**prepares the report to OSHA

 

[zeroturbulence]

How many CC'ers does it take to change a light bulb?


1 to hold the light bulb and get on the ladder

3 to post about how they're patiently waiting for their light bulb

2 to post about how their light bulb just didn't work out

1 to ask where's the best place to find light bulbs

2 to post about what type of light bulb they're looking for

5 to ask how they'll know their light bulb when they see it

1 to bump the ladder and make the light bulb drop, bringing the official light bulb count back to zero.

 

[Lynx]

You forgot the four who reassure people God has a light bulb for them... and the three who immediately jump in and yell at them about how God doesn't have a designated light bulb for every light socket.

 

[Roh_Chris]

How many people would it take to change a light bulb in a company ...

2 employees to report the broken light bulb to their manager.

1 manager to pass the report to the HR.

1 HR to send the request for purchasing a light bulb to the Accounts team.

2 Accounts Officers + 1 Chief Financial Officer to analyze the implications of purchasing a light bulb on the company's bottom line.

1 Chief Executive Officer to present about the ROI on the light bulb to the Board of Directors.

3 members of the Board to approve the purchase of the light bulb.

3 Purchase Officers to negotiate on the price of a light bulb (1 officer with 1 supplier to get 3 quotations as per the company's policy).

1 Legal Officer to finalize the Purchase Agreement with the supplier.

2 office boys + 1 company driver to purchase the light bulb from the supplier.

4 people to change the light bulb.

1 Marketing Manager to post about the changing of the light bulb on the company's official Twitter handle and official Facebook page.

100 people to like the post and praise the company for being so "proactive" in its decisions and for being serious about maintaining employee satisfaction.

 

[Lynx]

How many nerds does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on how long you want it to take and whether you want the job done well... or maybe not at all.




On a related note, I am never, ever, EVER again going shopping for an air conditioner with the sysadmin.

 

[Roh_Chris]

Is that from Xkcd?

I had a bad experience when my company wanted a mechanic to repair the air duct. Believe me, 5 members from the Executive Board had to work for 3 months to get one contractor to repair the air duct. And worse, the repair was over within half a day.

 

[Trailblazer]

I can imagine how this is going to confuse a left handed person. It can be difficult for him/her to turn counter-clockwise.

Seems someone may have to start a thread on how to install castors on a ladder for left handed people. This way all the lefty has to do is hold the light bulb while someone else spins the ladder around in a counter clockwise circle unscrewing the light bulb. How cool is that.

To make changing the light bulb a one person operation again. One may think of building a motorized ladder.
That way a lefty will not need a partner to spin the lefty round and round thus unscrewing the light bulb.

 

[JesusLives]

My question is Why did they start making light bulbs to look like curly que Ice cream? - Who thought that was a good idea? Stop confusing the Blond.

 

[zeroturbulence]

My question is Why did they start making light bulbs to look like curly que Ice cream? - Who thought that was a good idea? Stop confusing the Blond.

I don't like CFL's. One of them caught fire after blowing out and I was lucky I noticed it and was in the room when it happened. It was actually shooting a flame several inches from the base! I only realized something was wrong when i smelled something burning.