I get where you are coming from LionEyes. I am not in any way shape or form a submissive woman
when I am treated unfairly, unjustly, or I firmly believe the question or decision at hand is wrong.
The problem is that without Jesus we are all under the curse of sin. There is no equality without Jesus, it is not possible, because without Jesus there is always sin, and we all know that sin includes many forms of abuse, violence, and slavery. However, once we have been forgiven and redeemed under the blood of Jesus and are clothed in righteousness, we are a part of the body of Jesus. Since we are a part of the body of Jesus, there is no male or female, young or old, college degree or illiterate. We are all One in Him, we are all equal. That is why the people who get hung up on the 'roles of gender authority' are still living under and in the mindset of the curse, not the freedom and NEW life that Jesus gave.
Let's take a short look at the verses that gets many upset:
Ephesians 5:21-31
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. *
Notice the lack of gender differentiation in that.* [SUP]22 [/SUP]Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. [SUP]23 [/SUP]For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. [SUP]24 [/SUP]Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
[SUP]25 [/SUP]
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her [SUP]26 [/SUP]to make her holy, cleansing[SUP][
b][/SUP] her by the washing with water through the word, [SUP]27 [/SUP]and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. [SUP]28 [/SUP]
In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. [SUP]29 [/SUP]After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— [SUP]30 [/SUP]for we are members of his body. [SUP]31 [/SUP]“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
Countless times people skip over the second paragraph "Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church". If anyone has any understanding of how much Jesus loves us, they would know how profound this is. There would be no problem for me, despite my combative nature, to submit to a husband who loves me the way Jesus does. He would be a man who would consider my opinion in all things, listen when I talk, understand and care when I'm not feeling well, make decisions together with me.... basically he would be that super sweet guy who wants to do everything for you because he loves you so much, he loves you the way Jesus loves you. In contrast, an abusive man who never listens to you does not love himself, so he is not capable of also loving and respecting you. This is clearly stated by scripture above.
So you can see, without Jesus, the discussion of equality is pointless. Without Jesus even trying to attain or have any form of fair or just love, equality, etc. is pointless. Without Jesus, a lot of things are pointless.
On a side note, understand that hell is not the final destination, merely a holding place. At the end of days all of the lost (those not already saved under the blood of Jesus, whether they be dead or alive) will stand before the Judgement seat. Only two ways to get into heaven: by your own merit or through Jesus, and you cannot get in through your own merit as we are all sinners. Those not saved will be cast into the lake of fire, along with the devil and fallen angels. So if not saved, your final destination would be the lake of fire. My understanding is that it is worse than hell, and I would not wish that on anyone. I will take the completely fulfilling and consuming love of Jesus any day over the lake of fire.