Reasons why you should never chase a guy who runs away

[ServantStrike]

I think I am more thinking of before courtship. I was just giving a different spin on it to say that there are ways of going about it and the thrill that comes with it.

Well, then it's pre-dating then.


But, if a woman flirts back and in a way that's actually measurable then she's not playing hard to get really. It's when a woman is too coy and too subtle that it not only gets frustrating, but the perceived reward just isn't there.

See, I think you're setting the definition of the word "chase" to a reasonable and attainable goal. You should just call it normal human interaction with a member of the opposite sex .

 

[secularhermit]

It just seems more natural to me for the guy to chase the woman.

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If he was blind or lame... If she likes to play her hide & seek?

How could he see what he misssed being blind?

 

[secularhermit]

I think chasing after each other is a better way to go that way it is both people involved and it could be a lot of fun with flirtatious banter back and forth

You hit a nail, that should be mutual!

 

[secularhermit]

Hi guys....Guess what...the guy who ran away came back. It turned out he was so frustrated with me being hard to get and I kind of bruised his ego and maybe he wanted to be chased but I did not do anything because I was pissed by his running away. So I decided to give him a chance and been dating for a month now. But he is an unbeliever so I am pleading for your prayers that the Holy Spirit will move his heart and lead him into following Jesus. Thank you for all your words of wisdom and compassion. God bless you all.

Preciosa!

He might be handsome, he probably knows it better now but, if he is an unbeliever, your chances are reduced to being hurt, cheated on, etc.

Any people is entitled to do what they do but, real life has shown me -more than once- that unbelievers do what they want to do (much more than those who have an average fear of the Lord)

That´s like playing with fire, and I have played with that.

 

[secularhermit]

I disagree. Why should we chase women? I hardly have any physical activity these days. Running behind a woman for even a mile/km would leave me panting and out of breath. Why should I chase her? Why can't women have a toll-free number which we can dial and prebook them?

Ha! Ha!

Not sure if you were serious on what you said but, sometimes, they also would ask you to pay for her telephone and other bills. They expect us to pay and run (a thing good for the heart, by the way)

 

[Roh_Chris]

Ha! Ha!

Not sure if you were serious on what you said but, sometimes, they also would ask you to pay for her telephone and other bills. They expect us to pay and run (a thing good for the heart, by the way)

I was joking.

 

[secularhermit]

Thanks!

I wasn´t sure u were kidding.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

Preciosa!

He might be handsome, he probably knows it better now but, if he is an unbeliever, your chances are reduced to being hurt, cheated on, etc.

Any people is entitled to do what they do but, real life has shown me -more than once- that unbelievers do what they want to do (much more than those who have an average fear of the Lord)

That´s like playing with fire, and I have played with that.

Thanks for the warning SH. But God protects those who ask for His protection. He will fireproof my heart. A blacksheep is far more precious than a million white ones. And God will leave the whites just to go back and save that one black sheep.

 

[cinder]

Thanks for the warning SH. But God protects those who ask for His protection. He will fireproof my heart. A blacksheep is far more precious than a million white ones. And God will leave the whites just to go back and save that one black sheep.

Don't think you can defy God's commands and still expect his protection. He is not obligated to protect you from the consequences of actions you have already been warned against in scripture. Marrying an unbeliever is a bad idea, so I can't see any reason to date one. What is it about this guy that is so wonderful ( or is it so pitiable?) that you are willing to risk the hurt?

That probably sounds really harsh, but you are starting to sound like you're trying to make excuses for doing something less than wise. Even if it is God, guard your heart because this relationship is likely to be more costly than you imagine.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

Don't think you can defy God's commands and still expect his protection. He is not obligated to protect you from the consequences of actions you have already been warned against in scripture. Marrying an unbeliever is a bad idea, so I can't see any reason to date one. What is it about this guy that is so wonderful ( or is it so pitiable?) that you are willing to risk the hurt?

That probably sounds really harsh, but you are starting to sound like you're trying to make excuses for doing something less than wise. Even if it is God, guard your heart because this relationship is likely to be more costly than you imagine.

Thanks cinder...im not going to marry him yet. I know I cannot change him. Only the Holy Spirit can do that. How can we help in God's work if we dont give unbelievers a chance. If God just sent him so I can help him find the truth so be it. We might not be meant for each other but how will I ever know if I dont give him a chance by accepting his love. After all God is love and those who dont know love dont know God at all. I will just trust God in this journey.

 

[Nemakiza]

LOL, to be frankly I don't feel any disturbing thing for chasing a man If I love and want him, however I will stop if he says No and it depend. Some men feel shy to confess their love because of the idea that only men should initiate, that is why women end being played by men because probably in his mind "you are not for long" how will you know while you are into him? Another thing since men love to chase women they should know that there are accidents to get women who deceive you that they love you while not. There are a lot of stories about women who confess their love to their man and they got married and live happily ever.

However, I have never seen any verse in the bible that says woman should never chase men.

"If you are in love, that is all matter darling"

 

[Nemakiza]

Thanks for the warning SH. But God protects those who ask for His protection. He will fireproof my heart. A blacksheep is far more precious than a million white ones. And God will leave the whites just to go back and save that one black sheep.

Don't say that my dear, remember out here on the earth there are a lot of diseases and probably your man knows this too but you can't know his plans, some want to die early. I have a story that is very painfully. Some people who are unfaithful never change at all and they love it.

May God bless you.

 

[secularhermit]

LOL, to be frankly I don't feel any disturbing thing for chasing a man If I love and want him, however I will stop if he says No and it depend. Some men feel shy to confess their love because of the idea that only men should initiate, that is why women end being played by men because probably in his mind "you are not for long" how will you know while you are into him? Another thing since men love to chase women they should know that there are accidents to get women who deceive you that they love you while not. There are a lot of stories about women who confess their love to their man and they got married and live happily ever.

However, I have never seen any verse in the bible that says woman should never chase men.

"If you are in love, that is all matter darling"

As far as I know my life, I chased many dreams (mine, not theirs).

I do agree with you, in that of chasing a person I like but, friendship and love aren't things to be begged (none of them are to be begged)

Celibacy and asexuality is a new area of life I'm commited to explore (the best part of my life has passed and I can't be young twice).

 

[secularhermit]

Thanks for the warning SH. But God protects those who ask for His protection. He will fireproof my heart. A blacksheep is far more precious than a million white ones. And God will leave the whites just to go back and save that one black sheep.

If God's love or Jesus' haven changed until today an unbeliever, no one else can.

When I was PAGAN someone loved me as much as she can. I think I should have married her but, her religion, her ways on being in love with God was a stinking thing I regreted and saw oddly in her life. She was the best person I think I knew but, since I was a PAGAN, I was sold out to leaving her the way I left her...

I hope you're not playing with that fire.

Maybe you are the best person in HIS world, but I hope you don't endanger your soul for nothing, because that hurts, and badly and, afterward, we tend to blame God, instead our own adult decisions.

I love you, anyhow.

 

[Nemakiza]

As far as I know my life, I chased many dreams (mine, not theirs).

I do agree with you, in that of chasing a person I like but, friendship and love aren't things to be begged (none of them are to be begged)

Celibacy and asexuality is a new area of life I'm commited to explore (the best part of my life has passed and I can't be young twice).

Sometimes it is good to bend. Take it as a measure to your heart, if you are strong enough to be persistence. Most of the time our pride put us down, If we could think wiser, we could probably have what we want.

I read a story of a man who said how a woman cling into him. He said he hated her so much when she was chasing him, sadly one day that man was hospitalized and the woman was there for him. He said from that day I changed my heart and I love her more than anything.




*I think if you hate someone who said I love you, You indeed love them but you are not sure. If you don't want someone who wants you, you won't hate this person, instead ignore this person*

 

[secularhermit]

Sometimes it is good to bend. Take it as a measure to your heart, if you are strong enough to be persistence. Most of the time our pride put us down, If we could think wiser, we could probably have what we want.

I read a story of a man who said how a woman cling into him. He said he hated her so much when she was chasing him, sadly one day that man was hospitalized and the woman was there for him. He said from that day I changed my heart and I love her more than anything.




*I think if you hate someone who said I love you, You indeed love them but you are not sure. If you don't want someone who wants you, you won't hate this person, instead ignore this person*

Again, Nema! I'm with you.

PS

"*I think if you hate someone who said I love you, You indeed love them but you are not sure. If you don't want someone who wants you, you won't hate this person, instead ignore this person*"

Except in the area of ignoring people.

The only person I "ignore" are those I know hurt me, somehow, and those I know would insist on hurting me or my loved ones; because I'm used to know my "enemies".

 

[Roh_Chris]

Thanks cinder...im not going to marry him yet. I know I cannot change him. Only the Holy Spirit can do that. How can we help in God's work if we dont give unbelievers a chance. If God just sent him so I can help him find the truth so be it. We might not be meant for each other but how will I ever know if I dont give him a chance by accepting his love. After all God is love and those who dont know love dont know God at all. I will just trust God in this journey.

I've dated an unbeliever and I've been burnt once. I am yet to recover from the damage it caused to my spiritual life. I would warn you against investing too much into this relationship as long as he is not saved.

 

[Nemakiza]

Again, Nema! I'm with you.

PS

"*I think if you hate someone who said I love you, You indeed love them but you are not sure. If you don't want someone who wants you, you won't hate this person, instead ignore this person*"

Except in the area of ignoring people.

The only person I "ignore" are those I know hurt me, somehow, and those I know would insist on hurting me or my loved ones; because I'm used to know my "enemies".

In reality, people hate others as their self defense. Yes it is fine to have self defense, but to ignore someone is to not be read to comply with their demands, I don't think hate and ignore mean the same, or our hearts feeling are the same. For instance, you are arguing with your mates whether it's fine to abstain from sex until marriage. Some mates, would say it is fine and you know they won't change their mind, what would you do instead? Yes I will ignore them if they cling to their demand not necessary to hate them. That sound childish to me. Because they have right to express their feeling if I am not interesting no matter how much you have tried, this means I am ignoring you even though we keep chatting.

For me, to ignore someone's demands, is to intentionally not read to pay attention to their interests.

 

[secularhermit]

I've dated an unbeliever and I've been burnt once. I am yet to recover from the damage it caused to my spiritual life. I would warn you against investing too much into this relationship as long as he is not saved.

The ones who are to be saved are those who are alone and willing to be loved.

Yes!

She could be the missing key for his convertion but, evenly those who considered themselves "saved" have hurt their loved ones, sometimes.

 

[gypsygirl]

Thanks cinder...im not going to marry him yet. I know I cannot change him. Only the Holy Spirit can do that. How can we help in God's work if we dont give unbelievers a chance. If God just sent him so I can help him find the truth so be it. We might not be meant for each other but how will I ever know if I dont give him a chance by accepting his love. After all God is love and those who dont know love dont know God at all. I will just trust God in this journey.

first, i want to say that i agree with cinder's post earlier. i'm concerned you're minimizing this issue and seeing it far less concerning than it is.

i don't think there is a problem with a friendship with an unbeliever. but you are playing with fire if you think you can be romantically involved with an unbeliever. God cautions us to not be "unequally yolked with another" which is a warning that extends beyond marriage, and speaks to relationships in general. this is why it's probably not wise to get involved in any serious commitment or relationship that is with an unbeliever.

there is a reason why this is a far-reaching mandate. God could have easily only expressed this to marriage only. the potential consequence is great, and the risk is mighty.

and i'm very concerned you're wanting to negotiate a matter that is not really ours to risk. we have a Heavenly Father, and while we can choose to not cooperate, we simply can't escape His reach, or His intention for us.

you are the one who is gambling with your joy and peace.

we belong to Him, and God's laws and warnings are not to deprive us, but to protect us, and to help ensure God's best for His children.

further, we are called to not only flee sin, but avoid even the APPEARANCE of sin. i'd suggest that would speak a lot to not riding the line and trying to look for what might be "technically okay". also, God speaks to why we should be cheerfully obedient about his His laws. God says that if we love Him, we will keep His commandments.

finally,i think anyone who is interested in dating/romantic relationships would benefit from really studying God's picture of marriage, because this might help you understand better and/or further reinforce why i (along with others here) are so concerned about dating/being involved with someone who is unsaved.