alter personalities MPD

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microscoped said:
So much to answer but will generally do so. I married my wife in 2000. In 2001 the cheating started. she started leaving me and the children and moving in with other men. Over the last 15 years she has been more gone than here. Despite that I stayed in church. We moved out of state and started over. I stayed in church she stayed the same. I began working in the deliverance ministry evangelizing and a radio show while she was gone. She seen how well it was going and decided she wanted help too. During a season i ministered to her until we came to a point of things she never wante me ti know about. She then stopped. She then wanted me to change churches so she can go back and wasn't embarrassed I did and started in the church I am in now. While starting at a new church I kept my ministry to my self I was still traveling with the group but felt that they would take it as bragging. At the two year mark of my radio show it slipped out at church that I had been doing it. I was so happy of ten thousand views that it just came out. Then from the pulpit one of the pastors said " now if you come in here saying you've been having a radio show for two years we know you're just lying" this cut me. And then I seen why God never gave me the desire to say anything. Within the next few weeks everything came out and the pastor was on board. My wife was still gone. At one time the pastor let slip why he would never let me speak at the church and that was because " some pastors are worried about someone taking over." I continued to minister. My wife found out that if she complained about anything to the pastor it was like she got her way. One year after paying for a plane ticket up Israel she flipped out. She is very greedy and she hates that I spend money to minister. That was her complaint not that I was ministering to women per se. That was a small part. Her greed is what sets her off. She went to the pastor and my pastor asked if what would I do if he asked me not go. I said I would stay then. He asked about a refund on the ticket and I told him it was non refundable and the price was two grand but I didn't care. If he said no I would obey. My wife then made my life a living hell. Like always she would block me in a room and not let me out she would hit yell scream say she's cheating if I go she kept going on for hours then I reacted and screamed back. At that point I was told not to go to Israel. As soon as that happened she was in that pastors ear all the time. All the whole telling me daily she doesnt love me. She hates me wants someone else fantasizes about killing me at one time after come home from drinking ' mind you by now she's a Sunday school teacher' she brought someone in to try to kill me. She password protects her phone and everything. Lies about her wereabouts has people calling her phone and telling me its aman and plainly it was a woman. Wjich she had cheated on me more yhan once with them. And o find out that one she lived with cheating on me got out of prison a day or do before. It was her tgat was most likely calling. I then started texting someone i was with years before. During this whole time I had set my self down from ministry. I knew when to walk away. By the time the pastor said sit down I had been down for a couple months I think. A few months later I was asked to help out on my wife's as class to build Noah's ark. Even in there she couldn't help but be herself to me. I feel sorry for the kids. I shut my mouth though and just kept doing the ark. For months it went on. I finally got enough and walked out. A week later I was texting the same woman and my wife found out. I was called into the pastors office and told to step down. Which was no big deal since I already had. But the big deal with me was why wasn't she? I told pastor what I was going through with her a few times. She has never owned up to anything and I'm sure she lied but since I confessed to my wrongs I am sat down. I have been married 15 years. Besides the first year unless then too she was doing drugs moving out was in prostitution physically violant and do emotionally abusive. Someone said it sounds like I have no friends thats right. I found out that friends sleep with your wife. Everyone of my friends did. I m hurt and tore apart. BUT during all this mess Got used me. My stories of ministry are 100% true. You don't know the half of it. I gotta go. Tear me up all you want. I do not care. Even in my lowest times God can use me.
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I only ask one thing and maybe you need to really think about this. What made your wife derail so badly after only 1 year of marriage?



Regarding another comment you made on another post of yours some time.
When you stated you were a 31DP1, are you stating you were an Army Criminal Investigations Division[CID] Special Agent?

If this is true, how long were you a CID agent and did you enlist directly into this MOS? Were you a commissioned officer in CID?
 
microscoped said:
The only thing I am trying to hide ofmy history are identifying phrases or researchable information that will point to who I am. As far as my history and my shortcomings I have been open in the hopes of getting help without further compromising my integrity.
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You know what micro, why on earth would you come to a internet chat board in the hopes of getting help!?!?!

Please do not send me another private message. It is becoming evident that you are simply wanting attention.



You have successfully deluded a few here to play your game and they are petting you. You have got a few that are feeling so sorry for the guy that lost it all.

Not once have you taken any personal accountability or responsibility for you. It has been poor you and your lost ministry and the woman caused it all. The only regret you seem to have is you lost your ministry.

Not once in anything I have seen you post did you make any personal effort to save your marriage, you simply moved away and started doing what micro wanted to do and the rinse and repeat would start all over with your wife or so you say so.

Love rejoices in the truth.

A Christian based marriage does not completely melt down after only a year unless previously unknown/known issues were hidden or not dealt with. Either she was an Oscar winning actress, your people picker was wrong and you were deceived by her or something else. Christians do wake up on Monday and are backslidden. It happens gradually and over time.

I am not taking any side with your wife, because we only are getting your say so, so she is excluded. If it seems I am favoring her, it is based of all the drama you have posted, because the smallest details continue to give you away.

I am direct and challenging but not tearing you apart. Your penchant for false humility and suggesting people are attacking you is deflection that you fail to own up to the truth on anything other than your own version of events.

Nothing is ever one sided as you are trying to make this whole issue be.
 
I totally hear you. I respect what you have observed. I can see how you have made this conclusion. Even Smith Wigglesworth, who holds a record for raising people from the dead, suffered for years with extreme hemorroids that left him weak and embarrassed for years. He also had a daughter who, despite the many 'laying on of hands" remained deaf her entire life. I do not know why some healings occur instantly, or over a short period of time..or not at all. I do know I serve JESUS CHRIST who is still in the healing/deliverance ministry. Perhaps it is lack of faith, perhaps the result is of a bad choice, or something different..like being under demonic control. I find many reasons for sickness and death. I like your attitude, but I Feel that when I point out that most sickness and illnesses is a spiritual matter, it changes the perspective of all involved. How can a true HOly Spirit filled child of GOD be effective with constant pain and/or illnesses? In most cases that I have read and seen and experienced, bipolarism is a 'modern' term for an ancient demonic infiltration..where a person lives a double (Bi) life, where the brain 'switches' from reality to make-believe. There is NO mental sickness that cannot be eradicated by the Holy Spirit. There is HOPE and cleansing available to all when mental illness strikes. IT does not all come in the form of a pill or liquid in a bottle.
 
Joshua_Generation said:
I only ask one thing and maybe you need to really think about this. What made your wife derail so badly after only 1 year of marriage?



Regarding another comment you made on another post of yours some time.
When you stated you were a 31DP1, are you stating you were an Army Criminal Investigations Division[CID] Special Agent?

If this is true, how long were you a CID agent and did you enlist directly into this MOS? Were you a commissioned officer in CID?
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31D is commo. 1P is parachutist
 
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I went in in 94 basic at Sill AIT at fort Gordon jump school at benning stationed at bragg
 
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Let me guess I check out? Lol. And by the way I wouldn't have pm you had you not said you were in ministry for people like me. Shows that even though you are always attacking me I am still willing to get help no matter what. It ain't attention getting.
 
microscoped said:
Let me guess I check out? Lol. And by the way I wouldn't have pm you had you not said you were in ministry for people like me. Shows that even though you are always attacking me I am still willing to get help no matter what. It ain't attention getting.
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Are you really this naive? Get help from your current pastoral leadership, they benched you and have all the details. You need to ask them for the restoration plan and what you need to do.

If it is not about getting attention, why on earth would you air out all this stuff to people you do not even know?!?!?!?

I do not know which is worse the fact you don't get anything or the fact you seem to think it is perfectly fine to do things like this over the internet.
 
Joshua_Generation said:
Are you really this naive? Get help from your current pastoral leadership, they benched you and have all the details. You need to ask them for the restoration plan and what you need to do.

If it is not about getting attention, why on earth would you air out all this stuff to people you do not even know?!?!?!?

I do not know which is worse the fact you don't get anything or the fact you seem to think it is perfectly fine to do things like this over the internet.
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Hence the anonymity. I can honestly state what's going on without taking a hit on my credibility. My pastor checks in with me every few weeks " how you doing keep praying oh and your wife has accused you of this. Her sister says this. This person says that. That's it. I went to the adult Sunday School teacher and he went straight to pastor since " he's my spiritual covering" I have no one I know to turn to. Here I'm the go to guy. But where does the go to guy go?
 
microscoped said:
Here I'm the go to guy. But where does the go to guy go?
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Walking with the Lord is not like an army boot camp, where issues get sent up the chain. It sounds like your church structure is rather push button, and not real. It sounds like you want a parent to sort out the mess for you.

Some issues you just have to commit to the Lord and take ownership of them. Most people contribute to church, do the things they need to do, and church is the spiritual side of their life, nothing too heavy.

However you come across, with your emotional dilemma's, approaching most people would be just too much as demonstrated by your desire to share. You may not realise this but sharing to this level is normally connected to a collapse of personal boundaries, where sharing of everything, to anybody is ok. This is often linked to depression and other mental conditions.

Now there is a dilemma. To admit you have a psychological need which some would call the effects of a spirit, to seek proper help, either via anti-depressants or counselling would probably be like admitting defeat. But this may well be the place you are at, simply demonstrated by your behaviour here.

The problem is with many patients in this situation, the more people try to help the more information and problems get talked about. The problem is the feelings generate more and more reasons why there is a problem with no resolution.

You have to come to terms with how you feel about where you are. It is not going to change. What has happened has happened. The next question is what you are going to do next. Everything else is actually irrelevent.

You can resolve the feelings you have which are disturbing you, but that takes time, and often with the help of a counsellor. If your brain races away with you, anti-depressents help reduce this effect.

Now do you actually believe in God? Do you think He is not big enough to provide someone to come alongside you. Maybe that should be your focused prayer and honesty about your needs.
 
Oh my goodness, I can't believe this thread is still continuing.

Even boxing matches have limits on the number of rounds and the length
of each. Maybe it's time to hang up the gloves.
 
PeterJens said:
Walking with the Lord is not like an army boot camp, where issues get sent up the chain. It sounds like your church structure is rather push button, and not real. It sounds like you want a parent to sort out the mess for you.

Some issues you just have to commit to the Lord and take ownership of them. Most people contribute to church, do the things they need to do, and church is the spiritual side of their life, nothing too heavy.

However you come across, with your emotional dilemma's, approaching most people would be just too much as demonstrated by your desire to share. You may not realise this but sharing to this level is normally connected to a collapse of personal boundaries, where sharing of everything, to anybody is ok. This is often linked to depression and other mental conditions.

Now there is a dilemma. To admit you have a psychological need which some would call the effects of a spirit, to seek proper help, either via anti-depressants or counselling would probably be like admitting defeat. But this may well be the place you are at, simply demonstrated by your behaviour here.

The problem is with many patients in this situation, the more people try to help the more information and problems get talked about. The problem is the feelings generate more and more reasons why there is a problem with no resolution.

You have to come to terms with how you feel about where you are. It is not going to change. What has happened has happened. The next question is what you are going to do next. Everything else is actually irrelevent.

You can resolve the feelings you have which are disturbing you, but that takes time, and often with the help of a counsellor. If your brain races away with you, anti-depressents help reduce this effect.

Now do you actually believe in God? Do you think He is not big enough to provide someone to come alongside you. Maybe that should be your focused prayer and honesty about your needs.
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I don't want it to take time. U want it as fast as those I have ministered to. I'm not taking meds. I will focus prayer though. Thank you.
 
microscoped said:
I don't want it to take time. U want it as fast as those I have ministered to. Thank you.
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Two contradictions here. You said "I don't want it to take time", which means you want an instant answer.
"U want it as fast..." I have not talked about speed, but relevence.

It takes time, it takes waiting on God, it takes listening to your soul, letting your emotions speak, and then seeing where you are at the end.

Your response indicates that you have repressed and hidden so much, what you see you think you have resolved, but your testimony and whole desire and searching for support indicates it is completely different, but you do not want to look, because you are scared what you might find. It can take a lifetime, but it takes a willingness to be open and honest, vulnerable and giving.

But the fact you share, and want answers, friendship, guidance, shows you know things should be different. You need to find someone or maybe just you and the Lord and walk through your life, and start to feel who you are, not what you want it to be. I have to be honest, few know of this reality or need, or even what they are calling out for, only that they are calling. So this is not a cure, or miracle healing, it is a walk, one step at a time.
 
PeterJens said:
Two contradictions here. You said "I don't want it to take time", which means you want an instant answer.
"U want it as fast..." I have not talked about speed, but relevence.

It takes time, it takes waiting on God, it takes listening to your soul, letting your emotions speak, and then seeing where you are at the end.

Your response indicates that you have repressed and hidden so much, what you see you think you have resolved, but your testimony and whole desire and searching for support indicates it is completely different, but you do not want to look, because you are scared what you might find. It can take a lifetime, but it takes a willingness to be open and honest, vulnerable and giving.

But the fact you share, and want answers, friendship, guidance, shows you know things should be different. You need to find someone or maybe just you and the Lord and walk through your life, and start to feel who you are, not what you want it to be. I have to be honest, few know of this reality or need, or even what they are calling out for, only that they are calling. So this is not a cure, or miracle healing, it is a walk, one step at a time.
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You're wrong I do want to look.
 
microscoped said:
Let me guess I check out? Lol. And by the way I wouldn't have pm you had you not said you were in ministry for people like me. Shows that even though you are always attacking me I am still willing to get help no matter what. It ain't attention getting.
Click to expand...

I wonder what would happen if you actually were attacked? you pm'd me too....I've been in ministry for people like you....the best medicine is the Bible...and honey, you really need to grow up
 
pwrnJC said:
I totally hear you. I respect what you have observed. I can see how you have made this conclusion. Even Smith Wigglesworth, who holds a record for raising people from the dead, suffered for years with extreme hemorroids that left him weak and embarrassed for years. He also had a daughter who, despite the many 'laying on of hands" remained deaf her entire life. I do not know why some healings occur instantly, or over a short period of time..or not at all. I do know I serve JESUS CHRIST who is still in the healing/deliverance ministry. Perhaps it is lack of faith, perhaps the result is of a bad choice, or something different..like being under demonic control. I find many reasons for sickness and death. I like your attitude, but I Feel that when I point out that most sickness and illnesses is a spiritual matter, it changes the perspective of all involved. How can a true HOly Spirit filled child of GOD be effective with constant pain and/or illnesses? In most cases that I have read and seen and experienced, bipolarism is a 'modern' term for an ancient demonic infiltration..where a person lives a double (Bi) life, where the brain 'switches' from reality to make-believe. There is NO mental sickness that cannot be eradicated by the Holy Spirit. There is HOPE and cleansing available to all when mental illness strikes. IT does not all come in the form of a pill or liquid in a bottle.
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Well, Paul swung it somehow.

I disagree with your premise that all sickness etc is spiritual. We live in a fallen world where the devil is the prince of the power of the air.

Bi-polar is absolutley not a modern term for what was once called demonic...and yr description of bi is not actually accurate. Sorry, I did go to university. I mention that, because some appear to think that God will fill in the blanks in a missing education or lack of experience and go straight to their brains and pump the info in...does not happen that way.

IMO, people jump to conclusions...the first thing anyone should do is have a thorough physical checkup

Some disease is caused by how people eat...not demons...it's the person looking after their body

Telling people a demon is causing their affliction, is tatamount to malpractice in both the physcial and spiritual sense

So many conclusions being made OUTSIDE of scripture...
 
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