Marc, the more I think about this OP, and this thread, the more vehement I become about how wrong it is to copy and paste, to present Scriptures out of context, and how wrong some of the assumptions are especially by the men on this thread.
Let's see - if you prayed before you got married, and God said yes, then you will have a good marriage. I know women who prayed and had others pray and thought God said yes, and then ended up in a nightmare marriage with a selfish, mama's boy who would not lift a finger, and never put his wife first once, despite his supposed commitment to Christ. We won't even get into the abuse some of them have suffered at the hands of pastors, deacons and men who are supposed to be servants of God.
Then there is that infamous passage from Ephesians 5. Somehow, everyone wants to start the passage at Eph. 5:22. But Eph 5:21 is part of Paul's train of thought.
"submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ," Eph. 5:21
The rest of the Ephesians 5 passage is very relevant, as a household code in Greece or Rome, to teach men to treat their wives in a totally different way than that culture. The passage is written to men. Oh yes, the earliest manuscripts don't even have the word "submit" in Eph. 5:22, by the way.
I also hurt for the women who are single, who are being told the only way they will fulfill their "role" is to be married! It demotes them to something less than married women, which is contrary to Scripture. Paul tells people if they are able, it is better to be single!
" But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I." 1 Cor 7:8
As for those who were in marriages, which they prayed about, and ended up getting abused, then living in poverty when they sought to get out, like Misty testified to, I have heard this story over and over again.
I am blessed to have a wonderful husband, but my eyes are open to the truth that a Christian marriage needs to be accountable to God by both spouses. We each stand before the Judgement Seat of Christ to answer for ourselves. And I personally don't think a good answer is "Well, my husband made me do it!" It is demeaning to women to suggest that they are accountable to a husband, rather than to God.
Jesus Christ is the one who has been given authority. Because of the bad translation of 1 Tim. 2:12, many men have somehow come to think that they have authority, and a woman is to be under them.
"I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet." 1 Tim. 2:12 ESV
"διδάσκειν δὲ γυναικὶ οὐκ ἐπιτρέπω, οὐδὲ αὐθεντεῖν ἀνδρός, ἀλλ’ εἶναι ἐν ἡσυχίᾳ." 1 Tim. 2:12 Greek
The key word here is αὐθεντεῖν or authentein. It is an infinitive, which in the case of the ESV and most translations, means that you actually have to add a verb, such as "usurp" in the KJV or "exercise" in the ESV. The word "authentein" is a verb, whereas "authority" is a noun. In fact, the word exousia ἐξουσία, is the word for authority, and is found in such places as Matt 28:18 where Jesus tells his disciples that he has been given ALL authority.
"And Jesus came and said to them,“All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me." Matt 28:18
In fact, "authentein", used in the 1 Tim. 2:12 passage is a hapax legomena. That means that it is only used once in the Bible. Therefore, we have to look to contemporaneous sources to find a definition of this verb. There are actually over 50 different words used in extra biblical sources when translating this word. But the one that comes up the most, is "to dominate." Therefore, a women is not to "dominate." Given the culture in Ephesus, with the temple of Artemis, the kinds of rites and rituals and the dominance of women, Paul had a definite reason to write this phrase. He did not want the former priestesses of Artemis to be dominating their husbands. A far cry from the authority of men over women for all times. Or even husbands over their wives!
In the garden of Eden, there were no roles. As believers, we are not instructed to live out the Fall, with its roles and consquences of sin, daily in our marriages. Instead, we are to support and help one another. Eve was not a "Helpmeet" or "helper" as many translations say. Instead, God created her to be an equal partner, an "ezer" who was a warrior. God did not create a weak and submissive woman that Adam would have to take care of for the rest of his life. God created a woman who was his equal, his partner and someone who could help him fight in the battles of life. Yes, even in the Garden of Eden.
I have taken the time to study this extensively in the original languages. God's plan is NOT for a woman to be a door mat, or for the man to have authority over her. Only Jesus has that authority! As for submission, Eph. 5:21 says it all - we are to submit to each other!
