When they say Mary was a perpetual virgin, does that mean she didn't have sex even when married to Joseph after Jesus was born?
If so, what kind of sick marriage is that? Also isn't James the half brother of Jesus? Mary and Josephs son?
Mary was married to God, with Joseph assigned as guardian and breadwinner. It was not a marriage in 21st century terms but in 1st century Jewish terms and long before. There is nothing "sick" about it if you are willing to honestly examine the evidence.
Luke 1:36 - Elizabeth is Mary's kinswoman. Some Bibles translate kinswoman as "cousin," but this is an improper translation because in Hebrew and Aramaic, there is no word for "cousin."
Ezek. 44:2 - Ezekiel prophesies that no man shall pass through the gate by which the Lord entered the world. This is a prophecy of Mary's perpetual virginity. Mary remained a virgin before, during and after the birth of Jesus.
Mark 6:3 - Jesus was always referred to as "the" son of Mary, not "a" son of Mary.
Luke 1:31,34 - the angel tells Mary that you "will" conceive (using the future tense). Mary responds by saying, "How shall this be?" Mary's response demonstrates that she had taken a vow of lifelong virginity by having no intention to have relations with a man. If Mary did not take such a vow of lifelong virginity, her question would make no sense at all (for we can assume she knew how a child is conceived). She was a consecrated Temple virgin as was an acceptable custom of the times.
John 19:26-27 - it would have been unthinkable for Jesus to commit the care of his mother to a friend if he had brothers.
Acts 1:12-15 - the gathering of Jesus' "brothers" amounts to about 120. Mary would have to be pregnant for 90 consecutive years to produce that many "brothers". It's so absurd it's funny.
In Jewish Law a man betrothed to a woman was considered legally married to her. The word for betrothed in Hebrew is <Kiddush>, a word that is derived from the Hebrew word <Kadash> which means "holy" "consecrated," "set apart." Because by betrothal (as in Mt 1:18; Lk 1:27) , or marriage, a woman became the peculiar property of her husband, forbidden to others. The <Oral Law of Kiddushin> (Marriages and Engagements) states; "The husband prohibits his wife to the whole world like an object which is dedicated to the Sanctuary" <(Kiddushin> 2b, Babylonian Talmud). We know from the Gospel of Matthew 1:14 that Joseph the husband of Mary was a righteous man, a devout law-abiding Jew. Having noticed that Mary was pregnant and that he, her betrothed, had nothing to do with the pregnancy, Joseph had either to publicly condemn her and have her put to death for adultery (Dt 22:22-29) or put her away privately. His decision was made when an angel appeared to him in a dream, saying: "Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife; for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit; she will bear a son, and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins" (Mt. 1:20-21). The angel does not use the phrase for marital union: "go in unto" (as in Gn 30:3, 4, 16) or "come together" (Mt 1:18) but merely a word meaning leading her into the house as a wife <(paralambano gunaika)> but not cohabiting with her. For when the angel revealed to him that Mary was truly the spouse of the Holy Spirit, Joseph could take Mary, his betrothed, into his house as a wife, but he could never have intercourse with her because according to the Law she was forbidden to him for all time.
You have a choice: remain doctrinally anti-Semitic or keep an open mind.
Having been enlightened by an angel in a dream regarding her pregnancy, and perhaps further by Mary concerning the words of the archangel Gabriel to her at the Annunciation, Joseph knew that God had conducted himself as a husband in regard to Mary. She was now prohibited to him for all time, and for the sake of the Child and Mary he could only live with her in an absolutely chaste relationship. Living a celibate life within marriage was not unknown in Jewish tradition. It was told that Moses, who was married, remained continent the rest of his life after the command to abstain from sexual intercourse (Ex 19:15) given in preparation the seventy elders abstained thereafter from their wives after their call, and so did Eldad and Medad when the spirit of prophecy came upon them; indeed it was said that the prophets became celibate after the Word of the Lord communicated with them <(Midrash Exodus Rabbah> 19; 46.3; <Sifre to Numbers> 99 sect. 11; <Sifre Zutta> 81-82, 203-204; <Aboth Rabbi Nathan> 9, 39; <Tanchuman> 111, 46; <Tanchumah Zaw> 13; 3 <Petirot Moshe> 72; <Shabbath> 87a; <Pesachim> 87b, Babylonian Talmud).
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"Itis an article of faith that Mary is Mother of the Lord and still a Virgin."
Martin Luther, op. cit., Volume 11, 319-320.
"Helvidiushas shown himself too ignorant, in saying that Mary had several sons,because mention is made in some passages of the brothers of Christ."
Calvin translated "brothers" in this context to mean cousins or relatives.
Bernard Leeming, "Protestants and Our Lady", Marian Library Studies,January 1967, p.9.
"To this day we cannot enjoy the blessing brought to us in Christ without thinking at the same time of that which God gave as adornment and honour to Mary, in willing her to be the mother of his only-begotten Son."
John Calvin, A Harmony of Matthew, Mark and Luke(St. Andrew's Press, Edinburgh, 1972), p.32.
"I firmly believe that Mary, according to the words of the gospel as a pure Virgin brought forth for us the Son of God and in childbirth and after childbirth forever remained a pure, intact Virgin."
Zwingli used Exodus4:22 to defend the doctrine of Mary's perpetual virginity.
Ulrich Zwingli, Zwingli Opera, Corpus Reformatorum,Volume 1, 424.
UlrichZwingli : "I esteem immensely the Mother of God, the everchaste, immaculate Virgin Mary."E. Stakemeier, DeMariologia et Oecumenismo,K. Balic, ed., (Rome, 1962), 456.
Much of Protestantism has deviated far from its own roots.