Hey Everyone,
As singles, many of us talk about "loneliness"--but how would YOU personally define loneliness?
I don't know about you, but I can be (and am often) surrounded by people, but feel completely alone. I have also been in relationships, and even married, and felt the hollow, empty sting of loneliness as well (it was even worse then, knowing that this would be my situation forever, before it collapsed completely.)
For me, loneliness is a lack of being able to be myself and express what I'm thinking. All too often around other people, I put on "The Mask" we all wear and carry on throughout the day. I dutifully listen to what other people are talking about, and because I'm always curious, I can find a wide range of topics I know nothing about to be interesting. But getting someone else interested in what I'd like to talk about (the threads I write are a good example) is usually like pulling teeth, and I would rather be alone than constantly listening to others without them ever asking or showing an interest in what I'd like to talk about, too. If the conversation isn't going in two directions (with the exception of someone being in need, of course), I'd actually rather be by myself. To me, silence is a better companion than indifference.
Granted, I can't fault people at all for this because I have a pretty zany thought process. For example, I try to start my day with a devotional, so maybe in the morning, I'd want to talk about a passage I read (and I'd hope the other person would share something with me, too.) By midday, I might have read an interesting psychological aspect of a high-profile crime in the news (and I wish I had someone to talk to about it and ask them what they think.) By evening, it's been a long, hard day, and maybe it would be nice to spend time with someone and not say anything at all, but just have an exchange of knowing glances that said, "I'm exhausted. Let's just chill and watch a movie, please."
I guess for me, loneliness is the absence of sharing my raw, unedited self around another human being--and having enough trust between us that the other person will the same around me.
For me, loneliness is a state of being that can happen both when I'm alone and when I'm around other people.
And to be honest, I think it's even worse when I'm around others, because I lose hope that I'll ever find someone again (I had it once) with whom I have such a deep level of expression with, because that was the only time I felt like I belonged with someone and wasn't so alone.
Now I'd like to know YOUR thoughts on loneliness:
* What is loneliness to you?
* Is it worse when you're alone or with others?
* What makes you NOT feel lonely?
I know that God is supposed to be complete us and is always there with us.
But sometimes, as I sit and read the Bible, I feel even more alone when all I seem to sense is the deafening silence of the God who is always with me, but whose answer I all to often don't understand.
Thank you for sharing, and God bless. <3
How do YOU cope?
As singles, many of us talk about "loneliness"--but how would YOU personally define loneliness?
I don't know about you, but I can be (and am often) surrounded by people, but feel completely alone. I have also been in relationships, and even married, and felt the hollow, empty sting of loneliness as well (it was even worse then, knowing that this would be my situation forever, before it collapsed completely.)
For me, loneliness is a lack of being able to be myself and express what I'm thinking. All too often around other people, I put on "The Mask" we all wear and carry on throughout the day. I dutifully listen to what other people are talking about, and because I'm always curious, I can find a wide range of topics I know nothing about to be interesting. But getting someone else interested in what I'd like to talk about (the threads I write are a good example) is usually like pulling teeth, and I would rather be alone than constantly listening to others without them ever asking or showing an interest in what I'd like to talk about, too. If the conversation isn't going in two directions (with the exception of someone being in need, of course), I'd actually rather be by myself. To me, silence is a better companion than indifference.
Granted, I can't fault people at all for this because I have a pretty zany thought process. For example, I try to start my day with a devotional, so maybe in the morning, I'd want to talk about a passage I read (and I'd hope the other person would share something with me, too.) By midday, I might have read an interesting psychological aspect of a high-profile crime in the news (and I wish I had someone to talk to about it and ask them what they think.) By evening, it's been a long, hard day, and maybe it would be nice to spend time with someone and not say anything at all, but just have an exchange of knowing glances that said, "I'm exhausted. Let's just chill and watch a movie, please."
I guess for me, loneliness is the absence of sharing my raw, unedited self around another human being--and having enough trust between us that the other person will the same around me.
For me, loneliness is a state of being that can happen both when I'm alone and when I'm around other people.
And to be honest, I think it's even worse when I'm around others, because I lose hope that I'll ever find someone again (I had it once) with whom I have such a deep level of expression with, because that was the only time I felt like I belonged with someone and wasn't so alone.
Now I'd like to know YOUR thoughts on loneliness:
* What is loneliness to you?
* Is it worse when you're alone or with others?
* What makes you NOT feel lonely?
I know that God is supposed to be complete us and is always there with us.
But sometimes, as I sit and read the Bible, I feel even more alone when all I seem to sense is the deafening silence of the God who is always with me, but whose answer I all to often don't understand.
Thank you for sharing, and God bless. <3
How do YOU cope?
