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Would you ask your future spouse to sign a prenup?? (Poll)
- Thread starter zeroturbulence
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chancer
Guest
Must not click... the like button... shouldn't encourage... silliness on serious thread...
Eh, forget it. *click*
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crosstweed
Guest
My mom and dad never had a pre-nup, that I was aware of. However, by the time they had their first child, they made an agreement that who ever asks for divorce, they take the children. By the time I came along, neither one would ask for divorce. They felt safer in numbers.
But in all seriousness, I do see both sides of the situation. Especially if you have children. Then, it might even become more important then, as prenups can be more then just about money. It can also be about how to handle marriage problems. Agreeing to marriage counseling before divorce, etc.
If it was all about money, or just getting a prenup just to have one, then yeah, that would be a little bit insulting, and could cause you to question the commitment of the other person.
My ex and I had an agreement that if we were to get divorced that we each pay for the kids when we had them. No child support either direction.
Yea, that didnt happen. Who has to get a second job to pay child support??? This guy!!!
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Ultimatum77
Guest
Hmmm....I would actually think a prenup is a smart thing at least initially for the first 1-2 years. These days you can't trust people at face value especially when society has ingrained people to feel entitled to everything with free handouts and even awards for losing!
I would say only marry a person you can trust but of course trust is built up over years and not months....
too many people marry spur of the moment and then get burned when the person only married them for wealth, status (think most celebrity marriages here)
Finding good people is like diamond mining...you have to go deep down in the earth and you'll get scarred and bruised digging but once you find that good person you appreciate the journey to get to them. Sadly most people suck imo and finding good authentic people is pretty rare ( I can count the ones I know on my fingers lol) that care about you and aren't out for themselves.
Initial prenup is a good way to protect yourself and IDK but if you can set it to expire after 2-3 years once you really know the person and trust them. Most of the "modern" world today no longer values marriage anymore especially the commitment which takes a long time and dedication to overcome problems. Most want a quick-fix or "onto the next high" type of attitude of up and leaving so that the person who married with love gets burned bad by the other spouse and the divorce lawyer is licking his chops to get a cut of the pie.....
Answer: 2-3 yr prenuptial agreement that expires after the person decides on a set date or when the person initiating the prenup feels safe to terminate it and the person will stay married to them.....
I would say only marry a person you can trust but of course trust is built up over years and not months....
too many people marry spur of the moment and then get burned when the person only married them for wealth, status (think most celebrity marriages here)
Finding good people is like diamond mining...you have to go deep down in the earth and you'll get scarred and bruised digging but once you find that good person you appreciate the journey to get to them. Sadly most people suck imo and finding good authentic people is pretty rare ( I can count the ones I know on my fingers lol) that care about you and aren't out for themselves.
Initial prenup is a good way to protect yourself and IDK but if you can set it to expire after 2-3 years once you really know the person and trust them. Most of the "modern" world today no longer values marriage anymore especially the commitment which takes a long time and dedication to overcome problems. Most want a quick-fix or "onto the next high" type of attitude of up and leaving so that the person who married with love gets burned bad by the other spouse and the divorce lawyer is licking his chops to get a cut of the pie.....
Answer: 2-3 yr prenuptial agreement that expires after the person decides on a set date or when the person initiating the prenup feels safe to terminate it and the person will stay married to them.....
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Siberian_Khatru
Guest
Oh, how true.
A prenup doesn't have to be a tacit slap in the face, either. There's a fair chance it's coming from a place of fear - I don't disagree on that point - but we don't have to internalize it that way.
The prenup I would want is that we pray every single day together. Never miss a day. That would mean more to me then any amount of money,
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ntw1103
Guest
I wouldn't want to, from the get go, have a spouse sign something that basically says, "I think we're gonna work but just in case I get to keep my stuff." Starting with doubt probably not the best thing.
Ya know, they say love is blind, but it's not true. It's the people who love that are blind. They choose to remove logic and say ridiculous things and believe that people will always work things out. They'll never lie, never change, always be Godly, never cheat, and life will be cotton candy and rainbows because they married Christians instead of secular people.
Guess what? The Church has a higher divorce rate than the world.
There's NOTHING wrong with a prenup, and I'll ask for one. I plan on publishing books, and those suckers are MINE. While married I'll share profits and such, but if he goes bat crap crazy and cheats or decides to divorce me, there's NO WAY he gets to take the rights to my books (because he thinks he contributed) or my money because we divorce. Nope! And fair is fair. He can keep his comic book collection and money and whatever else he accumulates over the years. Prenups aren't about trust, people. They're about protection. People are inherently bad, not good. Christ is what makes us good, not anything we do or think we are.
Guess what? The Church has a higher divorce rate than the world.
There's NOTHING wrong with a prenup, and I'll ask for one. I plan on publishing books, and those suckers are MINE. While married I'll share profits and such, but if he goes bat crap crazy and cheats or decides to divorce me, there's NO WAY he gets to take the rights to my books (because he thinks he contributed) or my money because we divorce. Nope! And fair is fair. He can keep his comic book collection and money and whatever else he accumulates over the years. Prenups aren't about trust, people. They're about protection. People are inherently bad, not good. Christ is what makes us good, not anything we do or think we are.
Well, since it's so common for the world to live together without bothering to get married (often with numerous partners), the results of any set of divorce statistics are kind of skewed.
My two cents for what they are worth,
First off before marrying anyone make SURE that person is equally yoked, and it has God's blessing. If not don't do it. However if the marriage goes through, and things do go south, guess what. God has our back. If A marriage is built on Christ as the corner stone a prenup is not needed. If trust is an issue, then that marriage should not take place.
First off before marrying anyone make SURE that person is equally yoked, and it has God's blessing. If not don't do it. However if the marriage goes through, and things do go south, guess what. God has our back. If A marriage is built on Christ as the corner stone a prenup is not needed. If trust is an issue, then that marriage should not take place.
I would not ask someone I wanted to marry to sigh a prenup.
That being said, I am not as against it as others claim to be. I actually know a man who got with a woman, and married her after only a few months of being with her. She had a drug problem (and he did too) and he ended up spending much of the money he had on this. (He wasnt even close to rich but he did very well financially). She didnt have a job at the time which is fine if she were taking care of the home and all. But after a year she wasnt very nice to him anymore, and she was never nice to his daughter. And after a while she did leave him and asked for a divorce, and she even revealed (to his mother of all people) that she didnt want him, and hated his daughter, but she needed his money.
So its not at all hard to believe that these kind of things do happen in our world, it is very much something that happens, sadly. I can understand the trust thing, I mean if you dont feel you can really trust the other person, maybe you are moving too quickly and need to get to know each other better. But I wouldnt villainize the person who brought it up, either.
That being said, I am not as against it as others claim to be. I actually know a man who got with a woman, and married her after only a few months of being with her. She had a drug problem (and he did too) and he ended up spending much of the money he had on this. (He wasnt even close to rich but he did very well financially). She didnt have a job at the time which is fine if she were taking care of the home and all. But after a year she wasnt very nice to him anymore, and she was never nice to his daughter. And after a while she did leave him and asked for a divorce, and she even revealed (to his mother of all people) that she didnt want him, and hated his daughter, but she needed his money.
So its not at all hard to believe that these kind of things do happen in our world, it is very much something that happens, sadly. I can understand the trust thing, I mean if you dont feel you can really trust the other person, maybe you are moving too quickly and need to get to know each other better. But I wouldnt villainize the person who brought it up, either.
First, an awesome prenup story..
I just read the story of a woman who grew up poor in China and won a scholarship to Princeton University (a prestigious college in the US), and she was about to get married when her fiance asked her to sign a prenup. She refused, cancelled the wedding and instead threw a reception for poor children!See the whole story and video below...
Bride refuses prenup, throws 'reception' for poor
So the question is..
Would you ask your future spouse to sign a prenup?? Why or why not?
(Poll should be up in a minute or two)
I'm married, but I saw this and thought I would respond.
For a couple of singles on their first wedding, I think a woman (or man) should refuse to sign a prenup in nearly every case. It's like gambling on divorce, a sign of mistrust.
But let's say an old widow or widower with children wants to marry, and wants to make sure the children get their inheritance instead of going only to the spouse and children with the spouse. That's when a prenup makes sense. It could be seen as a sign of mistrust, but when it comes to wills, it makes sense to spell everything out before the wedding, and it's reasonable to take care of the legal end of these things through a pre-nup.
In Indonesia, some lawyers think if one spouse is local and the other is foreign, the legal solution is for the foreign spouse to sign a pre-nup to enable the other spouse to own land. I think it has something to do with married communal property and foreigners not being able to own land. The law is unclear since this is based on a cabinet level decree, while a 1960's law allowed for foreigners to pass land down to Indonesian citizens only.
and even if they wanted to I don't think they can steal the kids and demand money here.
Since 2009, both parents have the right to contact with their children and a child has the right to contact with both parents. By default, both parents retain joint custody of their children. However, this does not mean that children will live with both parents or that costs will be divided equally.Living arrangements and child support payments should be arranged between the parents and formalised by contract in front of a lawyer or notary, which will then be presented to the court. Children of a competent age (typically 12 years and older) have the right to express their opinion and should be consulted. Presenting a parenting agreement is a legal requirement for a divorce to go through. If a couple cannot agree, they may ask for the issues to be decided by the court.Single custody with access by the non-custodial parent is typically by request of both parents. Single custody without access is rare, and is usually reserved for abuse or endangerment cases.
And with a new husband the ex has to take another job? I don't think you even get alimony when you remarry, unless he's really wealthy maybe.
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