Bringing back my purity

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Casie2017

Guest
#1
#1
Hell0, ummm im not sure exactly on what to do but here it goes....
2 years ago I lost my virginty to a guy i was dating for a year. I thought he would be the one I would marry but we just recently boke uo after 3 years of a relationship. I am wanting to become pure again and wait to have sex again until marriage. How would I do that?
 
W

wwjd_kilden

Guest
#2
#2
What do you mean by become pure? You cannot undo what's been done.

If you feel you have sinned, ask God for forgiveness. Then , as you said, wait until marriage next time.

God is faithful and loving. He forgives our sins.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#3
Mar 13, 2014
42,421
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Tennessee
#3
If you confess this to God then in His eyes you are pure again. It's like you have said, wait until you are married before having sex. And this time do it. Welcome to CC.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#4
Feb 21, 2014
70,908
9,651
113
#4
Casie2017 said:
Hell0, ummm im not sure exactly on what to do but here it goes....
2 years ago I lost my virginty to a guy i was dating for a year. I thought he would be the one I would marry but we just recently boke uo after 3 years of a relationship. I am wanting to become pure again and wait to have sex again until marriage. How would I do that?
Click to expand...

Welcome to CC. Your OP is more appropriate for the Family forum. I can ask a mod to move it there for you. :)
 
M

MissCris

Guest
#6
#6
Casie2017 said:
Hell0, ummm im not sure exactly on what to do but here it goes....
2 years ago I lost my virginty to a guy i was dating for a year. I thought he would be the one I would marry but we just recently boke uo after 3 years of a relationship. I am wanting to become pure again and wait to have sex again until marriage. How would I do that?
Click to expand...
I think it's great that you want to do this :)

Virginity and purity aren't the same thing, so luckily even though you made a mistake that can't be undone, you Can still be sexually pure. Asking the Lord to forgive you is the best place to start with that, and making a commitment to not engage in any sexual activity until you're married is also a good idea.

Follow through with it, even when it seems too difficult. Don't give in just for a promise of marriage, or even a proposal. Don't be afraid to ask God for strength when you're tempted. It can be, and has been, done...stay strong :)
 
Gary

Gary

Senior Member
#7
Oct 23, 2011
246
14
18
#7
All you need to do is invent a time machine.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#8
Aug 13, 2014
26,736
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#8
Something from Ezekiel chapter 33 comes to mind...

[SUP]14 [/SUP]Again, when I say unto the wicked, Thou shalt surely die; if he turn from his sin, and do that which is lawful and right;
[SUP]15 [/SUP]If the wicked restore the pledge, give again that he had robbed, walk in the statutes of life, without committing iniquity; he shall surely live, he shall not die.
[SUP]16 [/SUP]None of his sins that he hath committed shall be mentioned unto him: he hath done that which is lawful and right; he shall surely live.

That's one example, but there are many others in the Bible. Seems the past doesn't matter so much to God. What matters to God is who you are now. Not what you were or what you plan to be, what you are.

MissChris said it best so far. Virginity and purity are not the same thing. Purity is what you have decided to pursue... or rather, to maintain in your life... now.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#9
Aug 13, 2014
26,736
8,972
113
#9
Oh yeah, one more thing. Next time you won't be fooled so easily by a guy. ;)
 
M

Messy

Banned
#10
May 26, 2016
545
3
0
#10
Casie2017 said:
Hell0, ummm im not sure exactly on what to do but here it goes....
2 years ago I lost my virginty to a guy i was dating for a year. I thought he would be the one I would marry but we just recently boke uo after 3 years of a relationship. I am wanting to become pure again and wait to have sex again until marriage. How would I do that?
Click to expand...
Confess it as sin. Ask Him to forgive you and cleanse you with His blood. Then it's done away. Maybe have a lust demon kicked out if necessary. Break the soul ties. Command every part of you to come back and of him to go back to him. Next time only date someone if God says it and never be alone with someone in one room. Just meet outside. Set those boundaries, unless you meet someone who can keep his hands with him, but I think that type of guy died out a century ago. I hope I'm wrong. Just to be sure meet out in the open or with others.
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#12
Mar 26, 2014
4,414
2,405
113
#12
Casie2017 said:
Hell0, ummm im not sure exactly on what to do but here it goes....
2 years ago I lost my virginty to a guy i was dating for a year. I thought he would be the one I would marry but we just recently boke uo after 3 years of a relationship. I am wanting to become pure again and wait to have sex again until marriage. How would I do that?
Click to expand...
One of our longtime members around here said something once that I've never forgotten. He said that the Bible doesn't command remain a virigin; it commands stop having sex outside of marriage. So yeah tell God you messed up and you want a new start, but then yeah you just go forward with the lessons you've learned through this and your resolve to not have sex before marriage will be stronger for knowing how crappy the fallout can be.

Two good points to keep in mind: 1) As others have said, the only way to be sure is to wait until you are actually married to have sex. Proposal, engagement, promises, or intentions can all change and be broken. 2) The name of the game is not to see how much you can do and still somehow legalistically remain pure, so have a game plan to keep yourself out of situations where you will be tempted. Basic ideas would be your dates should be primarily spent in a public place, if you wouldn't say it to him in front of your parents or his better to leave it unsaid, and keep a healthy activity schedule, don't drop everything to spend all your time with some guy. Oh and be up front with the guys you are dating that sex isn't an option, that should chase off the guys who are just looking for easy sex pretty quickly. Hope these ideas help you succeed and welcome to CC.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#13
#13
Casie2017 said:
Hell0, ummm im not sure exactly on what to do but here it goes....
2 years ago I lost my virginty to a guy i was dating for a year. I thought he would be the one I would marry but we just recently boke uo after 3 years of a relationship. I am wanting to become pure again and wait to have sex again until marriage. How would I do that?
Click to expand...
Stop having sex? Not much more to it than that. This whole 'born again virgin' thing isn't biblical, if you're getting at that. That's just a man made concept to ease the sense of guilt people have for their actions, instead of Actually confronting it.
Once you've had sex, you can't go back in time and erase it. You are forgiven by God, of course, but you need to accept that that is all that matters. People can't take their sins back and pretend they didn't do them.

It's funny how sexual sin is the only sin people want to take back, but it's also the only sin listed as 'a sin unto your own body'.

By the way, even if you are engaged that doesn't excuse having sex. Sex is meant till After marriage, not until you're sure you found the right person. The foundation of your relationship stopped being God based soon as you made that decision.

Not trying to put you down. We all make mistakes. But keep in mind there is no taking them back. I was 13 when i lost my virginity. Now i'm 40 and still regretting that decision.
 
Test_F_i_2_Luv

Test_F_i_2_Luv

Senior Member
#14
Jan 24, 2009
1,601
31
48
#14
cinder said:
One of our longtime members around here said something once that I've never forgotten. He said that the Bible doesn't command remain a virigin; it commands stop having sex outside of marriage. So yeah tell God you messed up and you want a new start, but then yeah you just go forward with the lessons you've learned through this and your resolve to not have sex before marriage will be stronger for knowing how crappy the fallout can be.
Click to expand...
the Bible doesn't command remain a virigin; It is true that the Bible doesn't command that we remain virgins for life.

it commands stop having sex outside of marriage the Bible commands to not have sex before marriage. In doing so, that suggests to me that Scripture is advising to remain a virgin until marriage.

Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
-Hebrews 13:4(NAS)
 
B

Brez

Guest
#17
#17
There is something important to remember about God. Once He's forgiven you. He will remember your sin no more.
 
laura_charlotte

laura_charlotte

Senior Member
#19
Dec 16, 2012
1,483
114
63
#19
MissCris said:
Virginity and purity aren't the same thing, so luckily even though you made a mistake that can't be undone, you Can still be sexually pure. Asking the Lord to forgive you is the best place to start with that, and making a commitment to not engage in any sexual activity until you're married is also a good idea.

Follow through with it, even when it seems too difficult. Don't give in just for a promise of marriage, or even a proposal. Don't be afraid to ask God for strength when you're tempted. It can be, and has been, done...stay strong :)
Click to expand...

Great message, so happy I waited, I wish more in today's society would follow suit, it is so worth it.
 
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