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S
try studying the use of the term ROD as it is used in the Bible, esp. Proverbs.
Oh, and the proper use of a proper rod will not break bones, leave bruises, or rupture skin. It will be a sharp stinging feeling with only a slight red streak.
We need to be very careful not to allow false worldly thinking to cause us to avoid biblical ideas.
Oh, and the proper use of a proper rod will not break bones, leave bruises, or rupture skin. It will be a sharp stinging feeling with only a slight red streak.
We need to be very careful not to allow false worldly thinking to cause us to avoid biblical ideas.
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M
then take a toy or something not hit them. I'm not saying do away with discipline I just don't think spanking is the right way, but who am I to say for you not to spank your children do whatever you want. 
No one in our family was spanked but we learned manners and were disciplined properly.
No one in our family was spanked but we learned manners and were disciplined properly.
Taking a toy away is actually a self-defeating practice, a child who is upset or throwing a tantrum will only cease that behaviour once they know something unpleasent will happen if they don't, that is why spanking is effective.
If in the midst of a tantrum you take away something they want they will cry and complain even more, like I have said young chldren cannot reason and think logically, they won't see you take their toy and think to themselves 'if I am quiet and well behaved I'll get my toy back!' they will just think 'I want my toy' and will then do the only thing a young child can do and that is draw attention to themselves to try and get their parents to understand what it is they want.
This is one of the reasons so many families are out of control, parents think soft measures like that will be effective but it is just fuel to the fire and often parents who don't spank but try this softer approach get run down and drained emotionally and the entire family begins to stuggle.
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F
if its not hitting I don't know what is. Hit: bring one's hand or a tool or weapon into contact with (someone or something) quickly and forcefully
If a child is having a tamtrum walk away and don't give them the attention they won't. Spanking won't solve anything. When I was a kind my parents took my toys for a long time like week time minimum I quickly learned if I wanted to have fun I better behave
The reason families are out of control is that they don't discipline their children at all it isn't because they don't spank them.
M
Well dictionary definitions aside, in the context of parent and child the word 'hit' is generally associated with a deliberate act of violence, spanking is the use of an open hand, so the force of a punch or hand slap is a lot harder than a spank to the backside (a soft area).
To use the word 'hit' when talking about spanking to me implies there is force and a violent intent involved and that is obviously incorrect and makes spanking sound like physical abuse.
As someone who was spanked when young I don't really like an ambiguous term being used that others would take to mean my parents beat me, which they certainly did not.
That aside clearly we disagree and that's fine with me, I don't advocate spanking, I advocate whatever actions are necessary to discipline a child and raise them right, that is down to the parents to decide.
What bothers me about this is people entering parenthood with the belief that spanking is bad and wrong simply because it is something that causes physical pain, pain itself is not an evil thing and applied by a loving and tempered parent can be used to the benefit of the child, the bible itself states this so to disagree as a chirstian is quite ridiculous.
I just wish more parents to be had an open mind and didn't buy into the insane idea that spanking is child abuse, if that were true the law would have to imprison every surviving parent from the 60s through to the 80s and probably more beyond that.
To use the word 'hit' when talking about spanking to me implies there is force and a violent intent involved and that is obviously incorrect and makes spanking sound like physical abuse.
As someone who was spanked when young I don't really like an ambiguous term being used that others would take to mean my parents beat me, which they certainly did not.
That aside clearly we disagree and that's fine with me
, I don't advocate spanking, I advocate whatever actions are necessary to discipline a child and raise them right, that is down to the parents to decide. What bothers me about this is people entering parenthood with the belief that spanking is bad and wrong simply because it is something that causes physical pain, pain itself is not an evil thing and applied by a loving and tempered parent can be used to the benefit of the child, the bible itself states this so to disagree as a chirstian is quite ridiculous.
I just wish more parents to be had an open mind and didn't buy into the insane idea that spanking is child abuse, if that were true the law would have to imprison every surviving parent from the 60s through to the 80s and probably more beyond that.
F
Well dictionary definitions aside, in the context of parent and child the word 'hit' is generally associated with a deliberate act of violence, spanking is the use of an open hand, so the force of a punch or hand slap is a lot harder than a spank to the backside (a soft area).
To use the word 'hit' when talking about spanking to me implies there is force and a violent intent involved and that is obviously incorrect and makes spanking sound like physical abuse.
As someone who was spanked when young I don't really like an ambiguous term being used that others would take to mean my parents beat me, which they certainly did not.
That aside clearly we disagree and that's fine with me, I don't advocate spanking, I advocate whatever actions are necessary to discipline a child and raise them right, that is down to the parents to decide.
What bothers me about this is people entering parenthood with the belief that spanking is bad and wrong simply because it is something that causes physical pain, pain itself is not an evil thing and applied by a loving and tempered parent can be used to the benefit of the child, the bible itself states this so to disagree as a chirstian is quite ridiculous.
I just wish more parents to be had an open mind and didn't buy into the insane idea that spanking is child abuse, if that were true the law would have to imprison every surviving parent from the 60s through to the 80s and probably more beyond that.
To use the word 'hit' when talking about spanking to me implies there is force and a violent intent involved and that is obviously incorrect and makes spanking sound like physical abuse.
As someone who was spanked when young I don't really like an ambiguous term being used that others would take to mean my parents beat me, which they certainly did not.
That aside clearly we disagree and that's fine with me
, I don't advocate spanking, I advocate whatever actions are necessary to discipline a child and raise them right, that is down to the parents to decide. What bothers me about this is people entering parenthood with the belief that spanking is bad and wrong simply because it is something that causes physical pain, pain itself is not an evil thing and applied by a loving and tempered parent can be used to the benefit of the child, the bible itself states this so to disagree as a chirstian is quite ridiculous.
I just wish more parents to be had an open mind and didn't buy into the insane idea that spanking is child abuse, if that were true the law would have to imprison every surviving parent from the 60s through to the 80s and probably more beyond that.
yes we can agree to disagree 
The Christian parents from my old church use/used a small plastic rod similar to the rod you turn on venetian blinds to open and close them. They'd give 5-10 swats - not enough to leave a mark - and that would be the end of it. The kids would go into the room for 15-30 minutes of sobbing and then they'd come out happy and playful, as though nothing had happened. The parents were loving and they told the kids they loved them all through the process, and explained why they were being spanked. The parents were strict to avoid giving the spankings out of anger.
This may shock some, I don't know. But the fruits of this discipline is evident in the children's behavior. Truly, it was often said in that church, that the first thing the heathens always noticed was the good behavior of the children. That alone was enough to convert people.
Quest
This may shock some, I don't know. But the fruits of this discipline is evident in the children's behavior. Truly, it was often said in that church, that the first thing the heathens always noticed was the good behavior of the children. That alone was enough to convert people.
Quest
P
i think you need to
1, have children over the age of 3 years, on a full time basis, to be able to even contribute to having a say in this debate.
and
2, THINK ABOUT YOUR SCRIPTURES.
there are many things in the old testament that Christain parents do not adhere to....but then go ahead n quote the ues of the rod as a discipline method. also after trying and trying everything else apart from smacking .....what do you do then?
we are to train and teach and love and protect our children.....if we smack...they will smack...then get smacked for that. this doesnt make sense logically. and yes if we as adults got a smack from our husbands ever time we did something wrong it would be assault. i agree. hitting in my opinion is wrong in almost all instances...but if you have tried everything else possible a good many times. taught,used the naughty spot, given press ups, had them write out scriptures, talked till you are blue in the face, grounded them , taken away their stuff,given extra chores, counselled them, prayed for them and with them etc etc...and still nothing works.....then i guess the lastest lastest lastest option would have to be a smack on the hand or thier leg.with again as part of any discipline a discussion on why they did the unacceptable behaviour and why that behaviour is not ok. prayer and forgiveness and move on... buttock smacking is not ok and studies have shown it can create sexual arousal because it is too close to their private area and that can lead to a whole different lot of unneccassary problems for your child.
we are instructed by God to train and discipline our children......but in the kindest way possible i think Jesus would say.
soooo if at all possible please dont smack. go take a time out yourself ....dealing with ourselves is more effective than always hitting our children. but it is necessary to discipline and teach and be a good example yourself. xx
1, have children over the age of 3 years, on a full time basis, to be able to even contribute to having a say in this debate.
and
2, THINK ABOUT YOUR SCRIPTURES.
there are many things in the old testament that Christain parents do not adhere to....but then go ahead n quote the ues of the rod as a discipline method. also after trying and trying everything else apart from smacking .....what do you do then?
we are to train and teach and love and protect our children.....if we smack...they will smack...then get smacked for that. this doesnt make sense logically. and yes if we as adults got a smack from our husbands ever time we did something wrong it would be assault. i agree. hitting in my opinion is wrong in almost all instances...but if you have tried everything else possible a good many times. taught,used the naughty spot, given press ups, had them write out scriptures, talked till you are blue in the face, grounded them , taken away their stuff,given extra chores, counselled them, prayed for them and with them etc etc...and still nothing works.....then i guess the lastest lastest lastest option would have to be a smack on the hand or thier leg.with again as part of any discipline a discussion on why they did the unacceptable behaviour and why that behaviour is not ok. prayer and forgiveness and move on... buttock smacking is not ok and studies have shown it can create sexual arousal because it is too close to their private area and that can lead to a whole different lot of unneccassary problems for your child.
we are instructed by God to train and discipline our children......but in the kindest way possible i think Jesus would say.
soooo if at all possible please dont smack. go take a time out yourself ....dealing with ourselves is more effective than always hitting our children. but it is necessary to discipline and teach and be a good example yourself. xx
M
First and foremostly.. I was spanked as a child. Always with love, restraint and never in anger. If my father felt the need to physically discipline, it was always with his hand,never angry, and never leaving marks more than redness,merely hard enough so i knew what I'd done wrong.
If my wife has something different in mind, I will look at it, but as I stand now, physical discipline without anger and consistently applied for certain behaviors, works just fine and as far as i can tell, is never spoken against within Scripture.
Now, four things to think over and perhaps clarify if you wouldn't mind, sister,
1) to tell me what i can't do because of my experience, before, telling me i need to look at scripture. Hmmm.
2) Comparing smacking your partner to disciplining your child is ludicrous. You are guiding children, a marriage is two people coming together to make one.
3) writing out bible verses as a form of punishment? associating Scripture to punishment rather than grace for trivial punishments? instead of anything else? even discipling your children physically? Interesting.
4) What studies are you citing with this? smacking children on the bottom can cause sexual arousal. Could you provide the case study involved? Do you think that maybe, if the issues underlined in said study, are there, (yes, im aware of these studies) perhaps it was from something other than merely being "smacked" in love, restraint, and without anger? Perhaps, nearly anything other?
If my wife has something different in mind, I will look at it, but as I stand now, physical discipline without anger and consistently applied for certain behaviors, works just fine and as far as i can tell, is never spoken against within Scripture.
Now, four things to think over and perhaps clarify if you wouldn't mind, sister,
1) to tell me what i can't do because of my experience, before, telling me i need to look at scripture. Hmmm.
2) Comparing smacking your partner to disciplining your child is ludicrous. You are guiding children, a marriage is two people coming together to make one.
3) writing out bible verses as a form of punishment? associating Scripture to punishment rather than grace for trivial punishments? instead of anything else? even discipling your children physically? Interesting.
4) What studies are you citing with this? smacking children on the bottom can cause sexual arousal. Could you provide the case study involved? Do you think that maybe, if the issues underlined in said study, are there, (yes, im aware of these studies) perhaps it was from something other than merely being "smacked" in love, restraint, and without anger? Perhaps, nearly anything other?
B
i think its ok to spank a toddler when you can't communicate not to do something. I think it should go along with the situation. like if you need them to stay close then you can grab their arm tight. If they are reaching for something dangerous then slap their hand away. But as far as spanking for discipline, I am still on the line. because if you spank someone and you were wrong, you cant take it back and how can the kid trust you.
I remember a kid that when people reached out for him he would cower, because he didn't know if they would hit him. Some kids don't know they did anything wrong until they are hit and it is a surprise to them.
I had both extremes growing up because my parents were separated. My mother was loving but did not guide me or give advice etc. when i went to live with my dad he was strict, militaristic and very loving. When playing with a light switch one day, with my sisters, my step-mom found out. the next day my dad woke me up and beat me with a belt for like an hour. After i had cried, we went to church, i think.(it was Sunday) I don't play with the lights anymore. : ) lol ...you can turn them on for me.
One problem with disciplining your kids physically is that they don't know what you are thinking when you are doing it. they don't know if you are enjoying giving them pain or you are trying to keep yourself from killing them but chose a less lethal punishment, etc. my dad told me " this will hurt me more than it hurts you." but then he would laugh during the act.
Now adays when i do something bad i kinda enjoy thinking of something bad or morbid happening to me. I wish i was beat with an iron rod till my brain came out. I would probably be stronger and not such a wimp. My dad probably had it even harder. but i guess that shows that a person will associate their actions or differences from their father, with their flesh from then on.
I think spanked people can develop a sadistic humor in seeing other people get hurt too.
Especially when knowing people get mutilated or that an innocent person can be tortured. You wish pain on yourself too. You want to die with them. And take joy in your pain. It kinda goes along with Christianity.
I remember a kid that when people reached out for him he would cower, because he didn't know if they would hit him. Some kids don't know they did anything wrong until they are hit and it is a surprise to them.
I had both extremes growing up because my parents were separated. My mother was loving but did not guide me or give advice etc. when i went to live with my dad he was strict, militaristic and very loving. When playing with a light switch one day, with my sisters, my step-mom found out. the next day my dad woke me up and beat me with a belt for like an hour. After i had cried, we went to church, i think.(it was Sunday) I don't play with the lights anymore. : ) lol ...you can turn them on for me.
One problem with disciplining your kids physically is that they don't know what you are thinking when you are doing it. they don't know if you are enjoying giving them pain or you are trying to keep yourself from killing them but chose a less lethal punishment, etc. my dad told me " this will hurt me more than it hurts you." but then he would laugh during the act.
Now adays when i do something bad i kinda enjoy thinking of something bad or morbid happening to me. I wish i was beat with an iron rod till my brain came out. I would probably be stronger and not such a wimp. My dad probably had it even harder. but i guess that shows that a person will associate their actions or differences from their father, with their flesh from then on.
I think spanked people can develop a sadistic humor in seeing other people get hurt too.
Especially when knowing people get mutilated or that an innocent person can be tortured. You wish pain on yourself too. You want to die with them. And take joy in your pain. It kinda goes along with Christianity.