All you can do is try and choose a person who's honest, of good character, and shares similar values. But things (people) can change over time, you can marry a princess and end up divorcing the wicked witch of the west. There's no guarantee that someone won't leave you, most people can't keep a month long commitment, let alone "till death do you part".
Choosing a Spouse Who Won't Leave You
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are very rare to find.
I'm sorry, I've been up all night and I have to revist this.
I'm not bitter toward my wife. I just can't give up. I have never rang the bell before, why quit now? I'm 37 years old with two kids that still wet the bed. Where am I going to go? All I know is God didn't give up on us, so I ain't giving up on him. When I married her over 11 years ago, there was three of us up there; me, her, and God. God ain't going nowhere, so I'm not leaving.
When we got married, someone gave us this 3 sided picture frame with my name on one side, my wife on the other, and in the middle it said a marriage takes three. It had some scripture on it. Out of all the wedding/marriage memorabilia she could have taken, thats the only thing she took.
I asked her the other night what it would take to get us back together. She says she doesn't know. I guess it's on me to figure out. I need a miracle. An Aaron Roger's hail Mary play.
Sure I could marry someone else, but I don't know that I could love them as much. I can't do that to another woman.
I can't fight a divorce in court, ain't a state in this union now that doesn't have no-fault divorce. I don't know if a court could really make a divorce. What if when Jesus said "What God has put together, let no man separate." was a statement of fact, rather than a call to action?
Sorry this thread has been hijacked. I don't know if you can really make a list of attributes for a perfect spouse. The devil is always creeping around.
I'm not bitter toward my wife. I just can't give up. I have never rang the bell before, why quit now? I'm 37 years old with two kids that still wet the bed. Where am I going to go? All I know is God didn't give up on us, so I ain't giving up on him. When I married her over 11 years ago, there was three of us up there; me, her, and God. God ain't going nowhere, so I'm not leaving.
When we got married, someone gave us this 3 sided picture frame with my name on one side, my wife on the other, and in the middle it said a marriage takes three. It had some scripture on it. Out of all the wedding/marriage memorabilia she could have taken, thats the only thing she took.
I asked her the other night what it would take to get us back together. She says she doesn't know. I guess it's on me to figure out. I need a miracle. An Aaron Roger's hail Mary play.
Sure I could marry someone else, but I don't know that I could love them as much. I can't do that to another woman.
I can't fight a divorce in court, ain't a state in this union now that doesn't have no-fault divorce. I don't know if a court could really make a divorce. What if when Jesus said "What God has put together, let no man separate." was a statement of fact, rather than a call to action?
Sorry this thread has been hijacked. I don't know if you can really make a list of attributes for a perfect spouse. The devil is always creeping around.
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Everything discussed here (For the most part) is WHY I choose to not marry, UNLESS God himself chooses for me. I know He is The Best One to know what is Best for me. IF He doesn't have a wife for me, then I'll just stay single for the rest of my life. Plain and simple. I can't afford to go through a bad marriage and I DON'T believe in divorce. This is not God's will or intention. So...I'll only marry once and I pray and hope and trust God Almighty, through Jesus Christ (Yeshua The Messiah) to grant me the right wife. Either way, I must be content.
Im amazed that most of you guys lean on your own understanding when you chose your wife instead of rely on God. I just dont understand it at all. At all. This is why you are having problems now. Only God knows who is the best for you. Im a single but I ve given to God that thing. I told Him to choose a husband for me 'cause He knows better who will be the best for me. And I know He will do it. And I will be a happy wife having amazing husband. I'd recommend it to you too. Give that thing to God. Dont behave like a non-Christian.
The Bible says 'If you marry, you have not sinned.' It is worth looking up the context, etc. But that passage doesn't make it sound like you sin if you go out and choose a believer you want to marry. It also says the widow may marry whoever she wills, but only in the Lord.
But I took multiple approaches to finding a wife simultaneously. I did have criteria, like I mention in this post. I also found someone I connected with emotionally-- the 'falling in love' approach. And most important, I asked the Lord to direct me to my wife and He did. That's not what my OP in this thread was about. I look around and see people marrying high risk choices for spouses who, from a Biblical perspective are not a wise choice, and I think there is a lot of room for teaching young people (or older single people) in this area.
As far as my wife and I are concerned, I was praying for a wife for a long time. I spent a Christmas overseas which caused me to realize how strongly I did not want to be alone and I wanted a family. So I started praying for God to send me a wife sooner rather than later. I read about Isaac and Rebecca and asked the Lord to send an angel before me to find my wife. Right before I found her, I felt like the Lord was telling me that I would meet my wife that month. It was one of those things where I was asking myself if that was the Lord.
The first day I talked with my wife (we figured out we'd met before), she sensed the Lord directing her to talk to me. So she sat next to the friend of hers I was talking to and asked him to play a song on the guitar he was holding. I struck up a conversation with her. She told me later that the Lord told her I was the one she was going to marry. I went home praying about whether she was the one to marry. After we dated, it seemed like the Lord was telling me she was to be my wife when I prayed about it. Once, she got upset on the phone, and it sure seemed like the Lord was telling me this background story on her (personal stuff) as to why she got upset. The next time we talked, she told me the story I'd heard about in prayer. That helped me to believe since it seemed like the Lord was telling me that she was my wife, and eventually, when I asked, "Why don't you believe Me?" Ouch.
Maybe a year, or a year and a half before I met her, someone said she'd seen my future wife in a vision. I said to the Lord in prayer, 'The secret things belong to the Lord, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever.' I argued my case that if they belonged to us, they belonged to me, too. So I prayed to see my wife.
I actually had a vision of her, the picture in the mind's eye type rather than the type where it's like you are there. It focused on her eye and spanned out really quickly. There were a few features I recalled. I did not memorize the face, but it was interesting later on. Those little features and details helped encourage me.
I would have loved to have gotten some prophetic confirmation when I was making my decision. After I'd prayed through and was sure I was going to propose and was 100% sure this was the right decision... after it was all settled, a preacher at a meeting prophesied over us about us going to many places and ministering to many people, which has actually been partly fulfilled, and it sure seemed to imply we'd be together for a long time. Sure enough, she accepted my proposal. And then her parents accepted my proposals for me to marry her (an Asian culture), and we married.
But I took multiple approaches to finding a wife simultaneously. I did have criteria, like I mention in this post. I also found someone I connected with emotionally-- the 'falling in love' approach. And most important, I asked the Lord to direct me to my wife and He did. That's not what my OP in this thread was about. I look around and see people marrying high risk choices for spouses who, from a Biblical perspective are not a wise choice, and I think there is a lot of room for teaching young people (or older single people) in this area.
As far as my wife and I are concerned, I was praying for a wife for a long time. I spent a Christmas overseas which caused me to realize how strongly I did not want to be alone and I wanted a family. So I started praying for God to send me a wife sooner rather than later. I read about Isaac and Rebecca and asked the Lord to send an angel before me to find my wife. Right before I found her, I felt like the Lord was telling me that I would meet my wife that month. It was one of those things where I was asking myself if that was the Lord.
The first day I talked with my wife (we figured out we'd met before), she sensed the Lord directing her to talk to me. So she sat next to the friend of hers I was talking to and asked him to play a song on the guitar he was holding. I struck up a conversation with her. She told me later that the Lord told her I was the one she was going to marry. I went home praying about whether she was the one to marry. After we dated, it seemed like the Lord was telling me she was to be my wife when I prayed about it. Once, she got upset on the phone, and it sure seemed like the Lord was telling me this background story on her (personal stuff) as to why she got upset. The next time we talked, she told me the story I'd heard about in prayer. That helped me to believe since it seemed like the Lord was telling me that she was my wife, and eventually, when I asked, "Why don't you believe Me?" Ouch.
Maybe a year, or a year and a half before I met her, someone said she'd seen my future wife in a vision. I said to the Lord in prayer, 'The secret things belong to the Lord, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever.' I argued my case that if they belonged to us, they belonged to me, too. So I prayed to see my wife.
I actually had a vision of her, the picture in the mind's eye type rather than the type where it's like you are there. It focused on her eye and spanned out really quickly. There were a few features I recalled. I did not memorize the face, but it was interesting later on. Those little features and details helped encourage me.
I would have loved to have gotten some prophetic confirmation when I was making my decision. After I'd prayed through and was sure I was going to propose and was 100% sure this was the right decision... after it was all settled, a preacher at a meeting prophesied over us about us going to many places and ministering to many people, which has actually been partly fulfilled, and it sure seemed to imply we'd be together for a long time. Sure enough, she accepted my proposal. And then her parents accepted my proposals for me to marry her (an Asian culture), and we married.