Poems, thoughts, songs

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K

Katri

Guest
I didn't see it this way, just tried being understanding towards you. If you can relate to some parts or fully, you will sometimes bring up things which may seem still painful to you, although if one feels understood by others it should be more helpful than feeling hurt by it.

Although it also depends on the way you decide to interpret what someone tells you, if you at this time see it as negative or positively meant from the other's point of view. If you are feeling very sad or hurt it makes sense that it is easier seeing what is told to you as negatively meant, especially if it did brought up more painful memories to your mind. Even though it might not have been meant bad from the other person's point of view.
You are right...
I'm just being a jerk. This might be an excuse but I can't tell the difference if I am getting positive or negative. I have always been screwed up.
 
M

MorningFlower

Guest
You are right...
I'm just being a jerk. This might be an excuse but I can't tell the difference if I am getting positive or negative. I have always been screwed up.
No, you're not screwed up. It is a matter of training, to manage seeing past one's own negativity at these times. With God's help too, of course, as when He is healing you and building you up more, it will become easier for you to manage this better.

I am also praying for you these days too, just letting you know this. :)
 
K

Katri

Guest
No, you're not screwed up. It is a matter of training, to manage seeing past one's own negativity at these times. With God's help too, of course, as when He is healing you and building you up more, it will become easier for you to manage this better.

I am also praying for you these days too, just letting you know this. :)
thanks. I'm glad you are the way you are. I'm working on it. Thanks for your prayers. I really appreciate it. I will do my best to not be a creep and heal so I don't act this way anymore.
 
M

MorningFlower

Guest
thanks. I'm glad you are the way you are. I'm working on it. Thanks for your prayers. I really appreciate it. I will do my best to not be a creep and heal so I don't act this way anymore.
You are no creep either. Don't look down on yourself this way. I am glad you are working on it, we all have our parts which needs getting worked on in life. Everything is a part of the process. You are precious.
 
K

Katri

Guest
(Heard this song in my head and it wouldn't stop playing so I decided to post it,
I think it's kind of how I feel sometimes.
I change leading 'man' to leading 'woman' just because it fits. No disrespect to Paul Young or anything.)

Every time You Go Away
Lyrics by Paul Young

Hey!, if we can solve any problem
Then why do we lose so many tears
Oh, and so you go again
When the leading woman appears
Always the same thing
Can't you see, we've got everything goin' on and on and on

Every time you go away you take a piece of me with you
Every time you go away you take a piece of me with you
Go on and go free, yeah
Maybe you're too close to see
I can feel your body move
It doesn't mean that much to me
I can't go on sayin' the same thing
Just can't you see, we've got everything do you even know we know​
 
K

Katri

Guest
White Rose
by me

Violent violets,
and white thorned roses swirl;
her beauty so cruel,
the kingdom in peril.
There was no mercy in her heart,
for she had taken life without pity,
their blood, her wine.
she had to be stopped.
For she brought death in her wake,
and many lives she would take.

The knight sun kissed
and glowing with power,
arises within this dark hour.
they raise the sword up;
and drops it down,

The white rose stopped dancing,
and split in two,
the reign of terror ended,
and the people cheered.
For the coast was clear.
The evil was gone,
for now.

-end-​
 
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K

Katri

Guest


I am no one special,
I fall into my flesh,
The fire it burns me,
The wind steals my breath away,
The grief tears my heart apart,
but it doesn't change who I am.

Angels I charge you,
in the name of Jesus,
go forth and raise your shields,
cover those in harm's
with God's great everlasting
and his long suffering grace.

I am no one,
but my God is great,
and I know who I am,
and who lives in me.

So I say Peace be still,
fires be gone,

In Jesus name.

 
K

Katri

Guest
Sail to me
Let me enfold you
Here I am
Waiting to hold you
 
K

Katri

Guest
I'm going to be alright
By me

It happens to everybody.
Meeting the wrong one,
learning lessons,
and moving on.

there's plenty of fish in the sea,
but there will never be another you
and I guarantee there will
never be another dream.

You were different that way,
I never knew that you loved me,
I want to tell you to stay,
but you're so far away.

I bought a ticket to the show,
to a place I cannot go.
I love you,
you were good enough,
I would have taken anything.

You tell me I'm going to be alright,
as we say our loving goodbyes,
with all my tears, grief,
I don't believe you were the wrong one.
I love you,
I let you go.
 
K

Katri

Guest
I like this song.

[video=youtube;_Gs3fg_WsEg]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Gs3fg_WsEg[/video]

Dancing in the Minefields
by
Andrew Peterson

Well, I was 19, you were 21
The year we got engaged
And everyone said we were much too young
But we did it anyway

We got the rings for 40 each
From a pawn shop down the road
And we said our vows
And took the leap now 15 years ago

And we went dancing in the minefields
We went sailing in the storms
And it was harder than we dreamed
But I believe that's what the promise is for

Well, "I do" are the two most famous last words
The beginning of the end
But to lose your life for another, I've heard
Is a good place to begin

'Cause the only way to find your life
Is to lay your own life down
And I believe it's an easy price
For the life that we have found

And we're dancing in the minefields
We're sailing in the storms
And this is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that's what the promise is for
That's what the promise is for

So when I lose my way, find me
And, when I loose love's chains, bind me
At the end of all my faith to the end of all my days
When I forget my name, remind me

'Cause we bear the light of the Son of Man
So there's nothing left to fear
So I'll walk with you in the shadow lands
'Til the shadows disappear

'Cause He promised not to leave us
And His promises are true
So in the face of all this chaos
Baby, I can dance with you

So let's go dancing in the minefields
Let's go sailing in the storms
Oh, let's go dancing in the minefields
And kicking down the doors

Oh, let's go dancing in the minefields
And sailing in the storms
Oh, this is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that's what the promise is for
That's what the promise is for​
 
K

Katri

Guest
the last video and lyrics
were just my emotions,
I've been feeling sad
with a broken heart lately.
It was just posted spontaneous,
there's no love story here.

I always feel stupid for posting love
songs unrequited.
I always feel stupid for chasing someone
that doesn't even want me back, for years.

I do like that video,
it's meant for two people who
want to be together.

It was my attempt at trying again,
I don't know why I try.

I'm pathetic.​
 
K

Katri

Guest
I'm done

You win.
I'm going to stop.
I feel like I'm bothering you now.
I know when I'm unwanted.
It's just hard to stop trying.
but I will.

I can't prove myself or my heart to you,
because I am not what you want,
I am not who you love.
If you love someone they should
never have to prove themselves to you.

I spent years trying,
which was futile.

You think I was cutting you down,
when all I was doing was,
I was asking you to stop hurting me,
and to stop using me.

Every time I try to love you,
I'm either mocked or rejected,
or pushed away.

and you win, you all win.
I'm stupid for trying.
I'm going to stop writing.
I'm going to leave you alone.

I'm done.​
 
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K

Katri

Guest
I know you
by me

Although I'm not a mind reader,
and I don't know your heart..
I know you, and at the same time
I don't know you.

I've seen and felt the darkness,
and I felt the gravity of hell pull you down.
I've seen the numbers that haunt and torment you,
I've felt your condemnation, and your fear,
I understand, what I am allowed to understand.

I've seen the sins that I won't name,
because what good does that really do?
It doesn't do good to condemn you more..

I know who and what you are,
and I know what you've done.
...and I still love you.

I think you forget who I am,
I am not "Katri"
I'm capable of all the same things you are.
I'm just a human being,
I'm not God.
You want someone to love you the only way he can.
With all your flaws and failures,

perfect love.

God never turned his back on you,
you turned your back on him.
He still loves you,
and he forgives you.

It's belief in what Christ has done for you,
he shed his blood so that you can be free.

...With all your heart.
You just have to turn around.


 
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G

Galatea

Guest
I know you
by me

Although I'm not a mind reader,
and I don't know your heart..
I know you, and at the same time
I don't know you.

I've seen and felt the darkness,
and I felt the gravity of hell pull you down.
I've seen the numbers that haunt and torment you,
I've felt your condemnation, and your fear,
I understand, what I am allowed to understand.

I've seen the sins that I won't name,
because what good does that really do?
It doesn't do good to condemn you more..

I know who and what you are,
and I know what you've done.
...and I still love you.

I think you forget who I am,
I am not "Katri"
I'm capable of all the same things you are.
I'm just a human being,
I'm not God.
You want someone to love you the only way he can.
With all your flaws and failures,

perfect love.

God never turned his back on you,
you turned your back on him.
He still loves you,
and he forgives you.

It's belief in what Christ has done for you,
he shed his blood so that you can be free.

...With all your heart.
You just have to turn around.


With the utmost respect, I don't think anyone expects a person to love like God. That's impossible. Human love from another human is enough.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
With the utmost respect, I don't think anyone expects a person to love like God. That's impossible. Human love from another human is enough.
Perhaps not consciously, no. But really we all want to find someone that accepts us, loves us, encourages us, never doubts us, never gives up on us, never disappoints, never fails us, etc...
I'd say many people look to others for that kind of love. Which is one reason so many miserable people are out there. They Are looking to man for the love only God provides.
 
G

Galatea

Guest
Perhaps not consciously, no. But really we all want to find someone that accepts us, loves us, encourages us, never doubts us, never gives up on us, never disappoints, never fails us, etc...
I'd say many people look to others for that kind of love. Which is one reason so many miserable people are out there. They Are looking to man for the love only God provides.
That's what I meant. That the stumbling, bumbling love of one human for another is enough. I know I love imperfectly, I don't expect perfect love for my imperfect offering. I mean, I misunderstand and doubt- so why should I not be misunderstood and doubted?
 
K

Katri

Guest
Perhaps not consciously, no. But really we all want to find someone that accepts us, loves us, encourages us, never doubts us, never gives up on us, never disappoints, never fails us, etc...
I'd say many people look to others for that kind of love. Which is one reason so many miserable people are out there. They Are looking to man for the love only God provides.
My point exactly.
 
K

Katri

Guest
That's what I meant. That the stumbling, bumbling love of one human for another is enough. I know I love imperfectly, I don't expect perfect love for my imperfect offering. I mean, I misunderstand and doubt- so why should I not be misunderstood and doubted?
no offense but what does this have to do with what I wrote? Do you think I wrote this to you? Is it relate-able to your situation or something?

I wrote it for a man.
I am the type of woman who was taught to take on both roles to care depend on myself, I was hurt so much I don't trust men..
I didn't need a man to save me, I didn't need anyone...because I am insecure, and neurotic at times...I admit.
Maybe it's wrong and emasculating for a woman to do this. To write and romance a man. Maybe I over did it and pushed him away. I never gave him the chance to be that for me.

Either way. I just need my own explanation of why things happened, ...and that's as good as any for me.
Maybe it's just closure...
my heart is broken, and this is all the closure I am going to get..

I have to move on.
 
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U

Ugly

Guest
That's what I meant. That the stumbling, bumbling love of one human for another is enough. I know I love imperfectly, I don't expect perfect love for my imperfect offering. I mean, I misunderstand and doubt- so why should I not be misunderstood and doubted?
You stated "I don't think anyone expects a person to love like God".
I said the opposite. That that is exactly what people do, unknowingly.
Now you say that we're saying the same thing. But I disagrees with what you said, so I'm lost.

I think her line is (don't know her specific situation, just meaning generalized) is accurate. And romance is often the most obvious, and common, example. So many seem to marry thinking that everything will be all better. That this person will be their happiness. Believing that the love they crave is Eros not realizing it's actually Agape that they seek.
But since human love and eros love cannot replace Agape, imperfect people keep searching, in other imperfect people, for perfect love. Perhaps that is what this man was doing?

I do agree, though, that we have to seek God for perfect love and accept that no person in earth can give it to us. Not can we give it to another. But until people find it in God they will continue placing others on pedestals whenever they believe they have found it in someone.