scare a date off with 1 phrase!

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HeraldtheNews

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
#821
Apr 26, 2012
1,550
437
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#821
"Pearls before swine" comic: (from memory): Goat's girlfriend says to goat, "you're not clingy are you?" "No" Then he shows her a tatoo of her face on his chest
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#822
#822
Can we talk about how ugly we are?
 
Tommy379

Tommy379

Notorious Member
#823
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#823
joefizz said:
I baked the chicken just like you said on the right temperature and on the right pan,do the feathers add to flavor though?
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Why would you do that? Everyone knows the only way to serve chicken is fried.
 
HeraldtheNews

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
#826
Apr 26, 2012
1,550
437
83
66
#826
"I only take anti-psychotic psych meds on weekends to relax"
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#828
#828
I brought some missile toe!...but the missile won't fire long enough over our heads for kissing while my toe is over our heads,I can't even get my toe over my head to make things perfectly romantic.
 
HeraldtheNews

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
#829
Apr 26, 2012
1,550
437
83
66
#829
From a "Tundra" comic: His not so tiny wife brings him chicken dinner: "Them sure are tiny drumsticks"
 
Tommy379

Tommy379

Notorious Member
#830
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#830
joefizz said:
I brought some missile toe!...but the missile won't fire long enough over our heads for kissing while my toe is over our heads,I can't even get my toe over my head to make things perfectly romantic.
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You must be North Korea.
 
MultilingualMessenger

MultilingualMessenger

Senior Member
#831
Jan 27, 2015
2,690
367
83
#831
joefizz said:
I brought some missile toe!...but the missile won't fire long enough over our heads for kissing while my toe is over our heads,I can't even get my toe over my head to make things perfectly romantic.
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Well if you want to be romantic, try visiting Rome to gather their ticks. Then bring them to a date. That would be perfectly romantic!
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#832
#832
My medicine says take as prescribed,well I prescribed myself with laxative so I'll just take it all today and see how things go to tomorrow if all goes well I'll be sitting pretty.
 
HeraldtheNews

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
#833
Apr 26, 2012
1,550
437
83
66
#833
"This is only our first date, so I would like to spend the next hour talking only about myself so you can get to know me"
 
Tommy379

Tommy379

Notorious Member
#835
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#835
EmilyNats said:
This trick is finding a man who doesn't mind it so much.
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What you need is a guy with an old pickup, a fishing hook on his hat, and a can of dip in his back pocket.
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#837
#837
I have to leave to find myself.
 
EmilyNats

EmilyNats

Senior Member
#839
Jul 28, 2016
1,374
205
63
#839
Tommy379 said:
What you need is a guy with an old pickup, a fishing hook on his hat, and a can of dip in his back pocket.
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So a redneck? LOL

I can put up with a lot of things, but dip is not one of them.
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#840
#840
Let's talk using ventriloquist puppets so we can communicate with each other.
 
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