A Question for the Men

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blue_ladybug said:
Both...........
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I was going to make a joke about wanting you to stop sending me pics, but I'm sure somebody would take it seriously, and that would not be a good thing....

So, just pretend that I made that joke, and let's move on....:rolleyes:

Sometimes people don't "get" my humor. My wife tells me I'm not nearly as funny as I think I am....:(
 
Didymous said:
Gentlemen, if a "woman" contacted you via private message, saying she needed your help, but wanted your email so she could send you a picture-what would you think was really going on? Hint-rhymes with hammer.
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Needed help?? Like financial help? :confused:

There's no need to email a pic. They can post a photo in their profile.

The show, "Catfish" comes to mind. Also, P. T. Barnum's quote: "There's a sucker born every minute."

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Didymous said:
Gentlemen, if a "woman" contacted you via private message, saying she needed your help, but wanted your email so she could send you a picture-what would you think was really going on? Hint-rhymes with hammer.
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Speaking from a married perspective......for starters, being from the pre-internet era, it's wrong for married people to have a relationship with a person of the opposite sex that your spouse does not know about. Yeah, called me old fashioned, but us old fashioned people lived when it was obvious how hurtful and wrong it was to do that. The ease of the internet is no excuse to carry on with the opposite sex in a PM for any reason whatsoever.

So it doesn't matter what rhymes with 'hammer'. Men should not be carrying on with females in a PM beyond a couple of innocent inquiries. And any honest male knows you don't accept the invitation to accept a picture of a woman on line any way.
 
Back when I used chats a lot I got a PM in Chat by someone claiming to be a 17 year old girl. She wanted to go on Yahoo messenger and talk and show me her pics. I knew right away it was fishy, but I went so I could report them.
They threw up a bunch of pics and started pushing me to rate her looks on a scale of 1-10. I told her I don't rate women like that and couldn't answer. She kept getting more and more pushy and insistent. I finally told her she was a zero because her attitude sucked and it made her ugly hahaha. She blew up on me and pulled her pics down and stormed off in a huff.
I had managed to grab some of the pics and checked them. They were all of some popular teen pop star at the time (I forget who). But they were candid shots, not posed studio pics, so I didn't recognize her.
I'm not sure if it was a setup to test people or some creep. But when I told Robo he said he already knew about her because she tried the same thing with him 0.o Not sure how that wasn't a ban.

If I get a PM, through forums, from someone that hasn't posted I don't even respond.

It's good to report questionable PMs. That way mods are at least alerted to the person and know to keep an eye out, or look into their movements on the site.
 
LOL! That’s the “welcoming crew”

i used to to get the same messages

I reported them but I also went into my private settings and stopped messages from anyone who was not a “friend”
 
Didymous said:
Gentlemen, if a "woman" contacted you via private message, saying she needed your help, but wanted your email so she could send you a picture-what would you think was really going on? Hint-rhymes with hammer.
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It would depend on how well I knew this woman. I would not send my email address to a complete stranger that's for sure. Now if a woman that I knew a little bit, showed an interest in me and sent me a picture of herself so I could see what she looked like, then yes, I would give her me email address and would probably give her my street address and phone number too. This question is not hypothetical for me as I met my wife on this site shortly after I joined. There are those that say that this is not a dating site but yet we are happily married and will be celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary on Nov 27. The answer to your question is YES.
 
tourist said:
It would depend on how well I knew this woman. I would not send my email address to a complete stranger that's for sure. Now if a woman that I knew a little bit, showed an interest in me and sent me a picture of herself so I could see what she looked like, then yes, I would give her me email address and would probably give her my street address and phone number too. This question is not hypothetical for me as I met my wife on this site shortly after I joined. There are those that say that this is not a dating site but yet we are happily married and will be celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary on Nov 27. The answer to your question is YES.
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Lol I liked this response.
 
Didymous said:
Gentlemen, if a "woman" contacted you via private message, saying she needed your help, but wanted your email so she could send you a picture-what would you think was really going on? Hint-rhymes with hammer.
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Well if "she" wants my e-mail so "she" can send a picture, I can assure you that whatever "help" "she's" needin', I ain't givin' :D
 
tourist said:
It would depend on how well I knew this woman. I would not send my email address to a complete stranger that's for sure. Now if a woman that I knew a little bit, showed an interest in me and sent me a picture of herself so I could see what she looked like, then yes, I would give her me email address and would probably give her my street address and phone number too. This question is not hypothetical for me as I met my wife on this site shortly after I joined. There are those that say that this is not a dating site but yet we are happily married and will be celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary on Nov 27. The answer to your question is YES.
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That is wonderful
congratulations

I’m pretty sure that is not what is happening with these messages though
 
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becc said:
I don't think this is a yes or no question... lol
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You know, you are right! I read the OP again and all it asked was how we would think, as a man if a woman sent a pic, and asked for an email address and not whether or not we would respond. I guess that my answer on what I would think is that perhaps this woman was lonely and looking for love with a lonely man. I should have read the OP more carefully. My bad again, per usual. :)
 
tourist said:
You know, you are right! I read the OP again and all it asked was how we would think, as a man if a woman sent a pic, and asked for an email address and not whether or not we would respond. I guess that my answer on what I would think is that perhaps this woman was lonely and looking for love with a lonely man. I should have read the OP more carefully. My bad again, per usual. :)
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Naively optimistic. 99% of the time a person you don't know online wants to exchange personal information and communicate off site is for questionable reasons.
 
And I don't say that as an attack or criticism. I believe a reasonable amount of each of those are good traits. I was pointing out that people that do such things usually do so because they have questionable motives and that's why they need to move things to locations off the site. So they can't be discovered.
 
Ugly said:
Naively optimistic. 99% of the time a person you don't know online wants to exchange personal information and communicate off site is for questionable reasons.
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Optimistic perhaps, naïve definitely not. As yourself, I am certainly not a novice on relationships, I've had my share of heartbreak and have been burned a few times too. I have extensive dating experience, and have made my share of mistakes. I have been married 3 times, divorced once, lost another spouse to premature death and currently happily married to my current and last wife.

I did say that I would not give out personal info to a complete stranger but it would depend on how well I knew this person. A person that desires a relationship but is afraid to act will remain lonely and alone for their entire life. There are risks in pursuing a relationship, calculated risks that I was willing to take.

Let's say that a guy is lonely. One day this guy sees a pretty girl close to his age at the 7/Eleven that has his interest. As he was paying for his Slurpee this girl smiles sweetly at him, comments him on the T shirt he is wearing and slips him a piece of paper with her phone number on it. This guy now has a choice, should he call a this girl that he hardly knows or be afraid to take a chance, crumbling the paper as he walks out the door and puts it in the trash can next to the Pepsi machine.

I would not say that I'm entirely optimistic either but do know from experience that a man with a feint heart will not win the hand of a fair woman. No, I'm not naïve but realistic. I have been around the block once or twice. I've been there, done that, and bought the T shirt.
 
miknik5 said:
That is wonderful
congratulations

I’m pretty sure that is not what is happening with these messages though
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I'm sure. There are a lot of sick people that take pleasure in hurting others. Of course, you should be careful anytime someone is seeking personal info. Thank you for the congrats. :)
 
Ugly said:
And I don't say that as an attack or criticism. I believe a reasonable amount of each of those are good traits. I was pointing out that people that do such things usually do so because they have questionable motives and that's why they need to move things to locations off the site. So they can't be discovered.
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The only reason why i would do that is probably i see someone that interests me and i would like to have discussions with him but won't it to be a public thing.... I don't think everyone that tries to chat with you privately has a questionable motive..... And it also depends on the type of site it is... the site we are talking bout is cc so yea, i could do that on cc cuz you never can tell what would come out from a "questionable" attempt. We don't know what is in the heart of people, some might mean no harm and some would..... i don't think we should base our answer on pure logic or recent happenings..... if you are married (which i think you are) then u should let you wife know about this. I really can't type anymore... my brain is taking a nap
 
tourist said:
I'm sure. There are a lot of sick people that take pleasure in hurting others. Of course, you should be careful anytime someone is seeking personal info. Thank you for the congrats. :)
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I’m not sure they are even thinking of others period
just themselves really
 
becc said:
The only reason why i would do that is probably i see someone that interests me and i would like to have discussions with him but won't it to be a public thing.... I don't think everyone that tries to chat with you privately has a questionable motive..... And it also depends on the type of site it is... the site we are talking bout is cc so yea, i could do that on cc cuz you never can tell what would come out from a "questionable" attempt. We don't know what is in the heart of people, some might mean no harm and some would..... i don't think we should base our answer on pure logic or recent happenings..... if you are married (which i think you are) then u should let you wife know about this. I really can't type anymore... my brain is taking a nap
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You’re very young. Please be very careful and talk to your mother or father about this and see what they tell you
 
I was 14 when I was molested so please be very very very very careful. Men who are older who are looking to talk to young teens have NO really good motives


do not do it and do not give your private information to ANYONE (male or female) on an internet
 
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