Enough

NoNameMcgee · Jan 31, 2019

I believe we should, as members of the body of Christ be willing to go the extra mile, to push ourself to help and do more for others if it is possible. (I believe that sort of sacrifice is us showing Gods love in us when it is for Him and we are walking in the spirit)

Though I also believe there should come a time, if our efforts are in vain, if someone were to be abusive or like a man who wants fish but refuses to fish for himself, then there needs to be a time where we knock the dust off and use what God provides in a way which can be more fruitful.

Sometimes it is easy to blur the lines between going the extra mile, and being taken advantage of or wasteful when you are giving time or energy or resources...

Any thoughts on when it is "enough" and time to give the sort of love which is more about forgiveness and well wishes from afar....

or when it is time to buckle down and help this person with everything you have.... (what God provides)

(and sorry for the run on sentences ... my grammar is poor)

CharliRenee · Jan 31, 2019

Very good question. Prayer and supplication first, seeking His will. Love is sacrificial but there is a line where the help given is harmful and could've been used by another in a more constructive way. It so much depends on the scenario, I suppose. Again, more prayer.

Curious what others have to say. Btw, your post and delivery were plenty coherent, in my opinion.

tourist · Jan 31, 2019

NoNameMcgee said:

I believe we should, as members of the body of Christ be willing to go the extra mile, to push ourself to help and do more for others if it is possible. (I believe that sort of sacrifice is us showing Gods love in us when it is for Him and we are walking in the spirit)

Though I also believe there should come a time, if our efforts are in vain, if someone were to be abusive or like a man who wants fish but refuses to fish for himself, then there needs to be a time where we knock the dust off and use what God provides in a way which can be more fruitful.

Sometimes it is easy to blur the lines between going the extra mile, and being taken advantage of or wasteful when you are giving time or energy or resources...

Any thoughts on when it is "enough" and time to give the sort of love which is more about forgiveness and well wishes from afar....

or when it is time to buckle down and help this person with everything you have.... (what God provides)

(and sorry for the run on sentences ... my grammar is poor)

The Lord told the apostles to shake the dust off their sandals when leaving a place where they were not welcomed.

"You have to know when to hold 'em, know when to, fold them, know when to walk away and know when to run..."

Your estimation is right on target.

tourist · Jan 31, 2019

CharliRenee said:

I fully concur about the coherency of the post. This member always has a tremendous amount of wisdom to offer as counsel based on his lifetime experiences.

Deuteronomy · Jan 31, 2019

NoNameMcgee said:

Hi NoNameMcgee, I think the Bible is clear about one part of this anyway, abusive treatment, at least where God, His word, and His witnesses, apologists, and evangelists are concerned.

Matthew 7

6 Do not give what is holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.

God's word is meant to be either 1. believed or 2. disbelieved, not demeaned, slandered or sullied. So, if a conversation you are having with an unbeliever about God, the Bible and/or the faith turns south in this way, then I believe we should end the conversation we are having with them (politely and quickly), leave, and then continue to pray for them. Perhaps the Lord will provide another opportunity (to you or to someone else) to speak to them again at a later time.

~Deut

LadyInWaiting · Jan 31, 2019

It can be difficult because some people are shady. So one time I was walking out of Walmart and this homeless man asks me for money. I looked for cash in my purse and as I open my bag I could see him getting closer to me and looking into my purse! I got scared. I backed away and gave him $4 that I had in cash.
Just recently my mom and I were at Dollar Tree. The lady before us in the register line was around 60. When we were leaving in the car, my mom said "poor lady she's walking all alone in this cold weather." I asked her, "should we pick her up and give her a ride?" Mom said "no...you never know what certain people can do to you. She could leave drugs inside your car." So we didn't give her a ride...I felt bad...but as I looked at the woman I realized that she did look shady.
So I dunno. I think it's good that we try to help people, but sometimes it can be scary. Is there a way to know if you can trust someone? Or should we be showing God's love in nonthreatening ways and what would be those ways? I don't want to derail your thread, brother. But those are just some questions I wonder about.
My biggest issue is personal, I think. I lack street smarts. My mom and brother can usually tell if someone is on drugs or if it smells like pot. I cannot do those things.

Deuteronomy · Feb 1, 2019

Hi @LadyInWaiting, sometimes the Lord literally lays people in our path and we end up engaged in ministering to them before we have the chance to consider whether or not it's safe to do.

Assuming that your church doesn't have established outreach ministries that you could join, my general advice to you is to look for a ministry (at an inner city church or parachurch ministry perhaps?) to work with inner city kids, or in a prison ministry, or at a crisis pregnancy center etc.). You'll be safer that way because you'll always be with others, you'll be known in the community you minister in as a member of a group that they're familiar with, and the folks who run the ministry will help you know what to look out for, what you should and shouldn't do, and where you should and shouldn't go, etc.

You will, not doubt, become a little more "street smart" as well, plus it's always more fun and usually more productive when you are part of a group

~Deut

Sweetmorningdew78 · Feb 1, 2019

I've experienced so much hardships in this life. Being born into a very poor family I developed this thing called empathy In every situation I always find time to stop and imagine myself in the situation of another person... I put others above my own desire...doing everything I could to help others even when doing so would hurt me.

There were times I told myself enough especially when I see that all my efforts and help go in vain...but I just can't stop...it is like I am already wired to be used and taken advantage of...When someone asks from me favors I don't expect anymore for the person to return it to me and yeah many of them didn't 😄 ...it is hard to say "enough". It just hard... 😢 especially when you still hope and believe that maybe this is the last chance they need to change ...but at the same time it makes me sad when I can't see progress in the life of that person and my effort does more harm in their lives than good because they become dependent,ungrateful and lazy 😢

Hungry · Feb 1, 2019

NoNameMcgee said:

It’s a good question. I think God tells us. There was a man on this site who contacted me for support of his ministry in Africa. He seemed legit. I prayed about it and told my wife. She was leery. I decided to send a smaller amount first. The people at the place where I sent money from warned me. I sent it anyway. Then I got an email from a stranger who saw my email address at the Internet cafe where this guy supposedly bragged about money he gets from people like me. He warned me he was a con artist and not the missionary he claimed to be.

Personally I feel the Spirit when being charitable. Giving here and there makes me feel good. I go by that.

Adstar · Feb 1, 2019

NoNameMcgee said:

I think people need to listen to their Holy Spirit guided conscience.. We should pray and ask God if we should persist or move on. It is important to stive to have a clear conscience towards God..

Acts 24: KJV
16 "And herein do I exercise myself, to have always a conscience void of offence toward God, and toward men."

NoNameMcgee · Feb 1, 2019

Sweetmorningdew78 said:

This is a perfect example of what I meant....

For the record I believe your love and empathy are coming from the right place. (God)

But.... sometimes...maybe what someone needs is actually different from what they say they need.

Maybe it is not always best to "walk away".... but maybe in some cases to give differently.....

maybe instead of many words... it is time to share funds or resources....

maybe instead of resources... it is instruction and a more firm communication.......

thank you so much
and thank everyone for their answers here so far

NoNameMcgee · Feb 1, 2019

LadyInWaiting said:

It can be difficult because some people are shady. So one time I was walking out of Walmart and this homeless man asks me for money. I looked for cash in my purse and as I open my bag I could see him getting closer to me and looking into my purse! I got scared. I backed away and gave him $4 that I had in cash.
Just recently my mom and I were at Dollar Tree. The lady before us in the register line was around 60. When we were leaving in the car, my mom said "poor lady she's walking all alone in this cold weather." I asked her, "should we pick her up and give her a ride?" Mom said "no...you never know what certain people can do to you. She could leave drugs inside your car." So we didn't give her a ride...I felt bad...but as I looked at the woman I realized that she did look shady.
So I dunno. I think it's good that we try to help people, but sometimes it can be scary. Is there a way to know if you can trust someone? Or should we be showing God's love in nonthreatening ways and what would be those ways? I don't want to derail your thread, brother. But those are just some questions I wonder about.
My biggest issue is personal, I think. I lack street smarts. My mom and brother can usually tell if someone is on drugs or if it smells like pot. I cannot do those things.

I had typed out a long story about "when giving to strangers goes wrong"
from many years ago when I was in unbelief.....
then deleted it.😮

Not sure it is meant for this platform... but you make a very good point.

GodsGrace101 · Feb 1, 2019

NoNameMcgee said:

What a great question.
The only reason you're asking it is because you're Christian and we tend to have a more sensitive conscience than most others.

Jesus did say a few things on this.
He did say that we should help, in whatever way we can.
He did say that if we're not accepted we should shake the dust off and continue.
He said we should be as gentle as doves and as wise as serpents.

So how do we put all this together?
We do what we have to do and what God would want us to do,,,even when it seems we're not getting anything back for it. I had much patience in my life with many, and for some it turned out well and for a couple it didn't do any good.

Problem is,,,,you don't know how it'll turn out till, maybe, years down the line.

I'd say to stop when you're feeling like you're being taken advantage of CONSTANTLY and when what you're doing is affecting your mood and taking the joy of God away.

When we do something for God we should be happy to do so...
When we feel resentment, we may be going over the line and it may not be doing any good.

Some say to listen for God's will --- not an easy task. This is why He gave us His Word and the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit will not be wanting you to do more than you can bear.

We need so much prayer...

oldethennew · Feb 2, 2019

great Post, NNM,

so thankful to share, that at this time of our lives, there is NO question as to our 'duty', -when-where-how',
we both are to man/woman-up what our Heavenly Father expects from the both of us...,
whether we are out and about together, or out and about by ourselves -we are so very blessed that The Holy Spirit
puts upon our hearts, just what our Holy Father wants us to do in each and every situation that He presents before us,,,

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