questian for those who want children

[Lion222]

Well, more than I want a child, I'd love to start a family under God. To share my blessings and life with a woman who loves Jesus as much as I do.


If we were so blessed as to have a child, I'd be as happy as I was nervous.


It is a huge task to help raise up a young one... The rewards aren't something I'm familiar with beyond what you get as an uncle, or older brother, or someone that's been able to see the face of a new person learning something for the first time... or being grateful or innocent or hilarious unintentionally or potentially super clever....


but.... if I had a chance to raise a child in a way that they could be a loving and helpful member of the body of Christ... I feel like it's worth all the trials and lessons I'd need to face to raise them...

(not sure I'm ready to be a father yet... or if anyone can be "ready" lol but happy fathers day to those of you who had children of your own)

Awesome. A family is one of the most powerful testimonies if you submit to God in doing thins his way.
There are promises you know. like bring a child up in the way they should go and they will not depart form it.
You can cower in fear and call it something else or you can submit yourself to love and suffer for others and Obey God as an example of Christ in this world.
That does not necessarily mean having kids but kids do push it right to the front of life.

Not everyone is up to the task

it is also a scary promise for parents.
Because our own sin that remains ends up being what we teach louder then our words.

 

[cv5]

So that they will become Football Stars and buy me a big house.

So that they can become preachers in the spirit and power of Elijah.

 

[GWYW_Bob]

Well gee... with such a short fuse you might want to wait until you get control of that before having kids, you'll be no fun at all. Lots to get upset about in life, my post was not one of them. And I was just kidding. They are to increase the power of your tribe. Still kidding. All kdding aside, since Paul said it was a choice to marry if you can control yourself, it stands to reason it is a choice to have children if you can control that as well. Have them or don't have them. Don't let anyone tell you that you HAVE to have them or you are not pleasing God. There are several things not biblical about that but I am sure you can figure out why.

I can not tell anyone anything but God can, and that's the point. Be frutiful and multiply is not for us to decide we just don't want to be burdened with children. God can command anything he wants and he says to have children, my pastor thinks that means at least one. I could take the easy way out and say "not at my age!" but God's word says, "Be fruitful and multiply".

This is not a complicated issue, if you aren't interested in children, then you shouldn't be interested in sex.

 

[cv5]

I am a lot older than my wife and I personally would prefer not to be a father, but my wife wants a baby and even my pastor reminds me that we are to be fruitful and multiply and since we haven't accomplished that yet, we should still try. I can't argue with that. Married people should try to have children. I don't want to concern myself with "What ifs", just that children should come out or marriage, although sometimes there is a very real infertility factor.

Same situation here. But we are not having kids. Politically the world is in upheaval.

IMO children today are both victims and hostages (which by the way historically has been a very tragic fact). Children today are instantaneously upon birth made debtors to the government and bankers (victims). They are also held hostage to nuclear weapons (do as you're told or you are all dead).

Furthermore the endless intense fusillade of Satanic influencing in the way of movies, television, MSM propaganda, sports, music, false religions, bogus Christianity........That is too much on my plate I'm afraid. As Paul said the times of present distress.

I could go on ad infinitum. But I will not for the sake of the sanity of the board.

Perhaps if we were younger and stronger, and had a stronger fellowship at our Church. But nope I think we will travel light and keep our heads low in this Spiritual warfare and simply wait for His Son from heaven.

If you don't have kids don't worry about it. God has called us to peace.

 

[GWYW_Bob]

I believe he was answering the OP
and being funny.

Could be, sorry, I just jumped in after seeing an alert to the post.

 

[Scribe]

I can not tell anyone anything but God can, and that's the point. Be frutiful and multiply is not for us to decide we just don't want to be burdened with children. God can command anything he wants and he says to have children, my pastor thinks that means at least one. I could take the easy way out and say "not at my age!" but God's word says, "Be fruitful and multiply".

This is not a complicated issue, if you aren't interested in children, then you shouldn't be interested in sex.

We all have our opinions and we all have a right to them.

If you are saying that your pastor told you that the bible teaches that one must attempt to have children because the scripture says in Gen 1:28...

And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. ...

And also after the flood in Gen 6:1 he said....

And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth. 2And the fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every fowl of the air, upon all that moveth upon the earth, and upon all the fishes of the sea; into your hand are they delivered. 3Every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you; even as the green herb have I given you all things.

I would say that the command to be fruitful and multiply applied to those he was speaking too and that the mission was long since accomplished.

Heremeneutics (the art and science of interpretation of scripture) has a list of rules one of them being to ask the question "Who was he speaking to, what were the historical and culture settings, how would this apply to us today etc..." Common sense I know but nevertheless they are questions that should be asked. In this instance there was a need to populate the earth. That is no longer a need and this is not still the mission of the Church. Jesus never once mentioned it as part of the Great Commission to go into all the world and teach all nations to obey his commandments and Jesus never commanded anyone to be fruitful and mutiply and replenish the earth.

Then we have Paul in 1 Cor 7 saying that for the sake of un-distracted focus on service to the Lord and the present circumstances of those in Corinth who asked him the question. it was better if they could control their sex drive to stay unmarried but if they could not to marry for it was better to marry than to burn. He does not say that children should then be the mans focus he simply said that it would be a solution to the sex issue. So yes. Paul said for the purpose of SEX one should marry and he said nothing about a COMMAND to have children in order to populate the post diluvian world.

Christians are under the God given mission to be fruitful by sharing the gospel and bringing others into saving faith of Jesus Christ. That is our current mission. You are not sinning by not having children. You are not sinning if you do.

That is my opinion on what the bible says on this topic. Have a child because you want to, not because you think it is sinful not to. Think about doing all things from the motivation of Love. God bless and may you have a whole quiver full. (I heard a quiver of arrows was 5, lol, I have no idea if it is true)

 

[cv5]

Awesome. A family is one of the most powerful testimonies if you submit to God in doing thins his way.
There are promises you know. like bring a child up in the way they should go and they will not depart form it.
You can cower in fear and call it something else or you can submit yourself to love and suffer for others and Obey God as an example of Christ in this world.
That does not necessarily mean having kids but kids do push it right to the front of life.

Not everyone is up to the task

it is also a scary promise for parents.
Because our own sin that remains ends up being what we teach louder then our words.

There's a lot of loose talk about reasons for having kids, and why THEY (the parents) want kids.
Nobody seems to want to answer the critical question: DO THE KIDS WANT YOU?
I am a firsthand witness to many MANY situations where the parents were absolutely deplorable and the children suffered incredibly under their despotic idiotic rule. Basically the children were doomed right out of the gate, this at the hands of their wicked parents.

The selfishness just beggars the imagination. I cannot find for the life of me three good UNSELFISH reasons to have children. But I can easily elucidate 100,000 reasons not to.

The next question is: is it morally acceptable to impose risk upon people who cannot not ask for themselves? The history books are filled with incredible horrors that are inflicted upon children without mercy. If there is so much is one in a million chance that is going to happen to my kids, I'm folding my hand and I'm out.

And doing your best does not mean much when the wicked king simply decides to murder everyone. Game over. This world is basically a gigantic mass grave. The endless wars death, terror and destruction really it's off the charts. We are so obsessed with killing that we built nuclear and biological weapons can kill everyone at the push of a button.....everybody dead in 45 minutes. Homocide with such efficiency that it is incredible. That is the true state of human society, not the fantasy that everyone would have us believe.

And last but not least, It has become very clear to me after a great deal of detective work and investigation, that the elite rulers of this world are in fact the most evil the most wicked the most greedy and by far the worst liars of all. They are abject Satan worshipers of the first order. Those are our bosses, and the fact that I do not have the power to kick them out of office is the final reason that I cannot possibly have kids. If I cannot even muster a decent fight to defend my family against these people for the sake of my kids forget it.

Nope. Jesus Christ is coming to destroy this wickedness so let Him take care of it. I refuse to participate in a hopeless fallen world doomed to destruction and that in the very near future.

 

[cv5]

You have children in order to grow up.
You cant remain fearful and cowardly all of your life.
OK so only partly true, some of us never grow up.

Either your faith is in God, to do in and through you what you can not or its in your reasons not to.
Yeah during Paul's time the church was under attack "present distresses"
Can you imagine having to watch you kids die because you or they cant let go of their faith in God?

Yeah, you would understand God better then.
I am sure Paul sat with a number of families who has lost their kids to the faith as martyrs.
Wanting to spare people that pain is understandable.
We don't live in that situation right now, well most of us do not but I would not be surprised if it was around the corner.
Truth is you have to trust our kids to Gods hand just like everything else, it you do not they become idols.

Sorry man. Having kids to "grow up" is a selfish reason and insufficient cause.

So when it all goes wrong, the Huns are at the gate, And you know despite your best efforts you could not protect and defend your children, what do you do then?

Apologize to those children and tell them that you made a terrible mistake?

 

[cv5]

Awesome. A family is one of the most powerful testimonies if you submit to God in doing thins his way.
There are promises you know. like bring a child up in the way they should go and they will not depart form it.
You can cower in fear and call it something else or you can submit yourself to love and suffer for others and Obey God as an example of Christ in this world.
That does not necessarily mean having kids but kids do push it right to the front of life.

Not everyone is up to the task

it is also a scary promise for parents.
Because our own sin that remains ends up being what we teach louder then our words.

I don't want my kids inheriting my sin. I also don't want them to suffer for my failings and my deficiencies and my lack. But worst of all the thought of having my kids suffering because I made a mistake is something I will not stand for. Is that cowardice? Or thoughtful benevolence?

BTW one of the most persistent prayers at the prayer meetings at our church, is for their unsaved children. Same goes with my wife's family. Now that is a failure that I will never experience.

 

[Scribe]

There's a lot of loose talk about reasons for having kids, and why THEY (the parents) want kids.
Nobody seems to want to answer the critical question: DO THE KIDS WANT YOU?
I am a firsthand witness to many MANY situations where the parents were absolutely deplorable and the children suffered incredibly under their despotic idiotic rule. Basically the children were doomed right out of the gate, this at the hands of their wicked parents.

The selfishness just beggars the imagination. I cannot find for the life of me three good UNSELFISH reasons to have children. But I can easily elucidate 100,000 reasons not to.

The next question is: is it morally acceptable to impose risk upon people who cannot not ask for themselves? The history books are filled with incredible horrors that are inflicted upon children without mercy. If there is so much is one in a million chance that is going to happen to my kids, I'm folding my hand and I'm out.

And doing your best does not mean much when the wicked king simply decides to murder everyone. Game over. This world is basically a gigantic mass grave. The endless wars death, terror and destruction really it's off the charts. We are so obsessed with killing that we built nuclear and biological weapons can kill everyone at the push of a button.....everybody dead in 45 minutes. Homocide with such efficiency that it is incredible. That is the true state of human society, not the fantasy that everyone would have us believe.

And last but not least, It has become very clear to me after a great deal of detective work and investigation, that the elite rulers of this world are in fact the most evil the most wicked the most greedy and by far the worst liars of all. They are abject Satan worshipers of the first order. Those are our bosses, and the fact that I do not have the power to kick them out of office is the final reason that I cannot possibly have kids. If I cannot even muster a decent fight to defend my family against these people for the sake of my kids forget it.

Nope. Jesus Christ is coming to destroy this wickedness so let Him take care of it. I refuse to participate in a hopeless fallen world doomed to destruction and that in the very near future.

Pessimist much?

 

[Scribe]

I don't want my kids inheriting my sin. I also don't want them to suffer for my failings and my deficiencies and my lack. But worst of all the thought of having my kids suffering because I made a mistake is something I will not stand for. Is that cowardice? Or thoughtful benevolence?

BTW one of the most persistent prayers at the prayer meetings at our church, is for their unsaved children. Same goes with my wife's family. Now that is a failure that I will never experience.

I had one child, he is 33 now. If I had to do it over I would have had at least 5. No one has been blown up with a nuclear bomb yet, he did not turn gay, and even with the heart ache of teen age rebellion I am living to see him mature to be a man of character who wants to serve God which is what I prayed for for many years. I don't think the world is such a horrible place that your kids cannot have a happy life and make it to heaven. Train them up in the way they should go and when they are old they will not depart.

 

[cv5]

Pessimist much?

Was Mao Zedong a pessimist? How about Genghis Khan? Hitler?

Maybe you do not know this but extremely elevated self-esteem is an artefact of a criminal psychological profile. Jails are filled with people who are optimists.

 

[TheIndianGirl]

I disagree that we are required to marry and/or have children, based on what Paul says. The Bible does not say that we need to have at least one child. However, I do believe children are blessings. I agree that there are a lot of parents out there who shouldn't be parents (people who neglect or abuse their kids).

The main reasons why I want a child/children:
1) so I won't be lonely when I'm old, so someone will take care of me
2) so I don't feel "incomplete," always wondering if being childless caused a void in my life
3) so I "fit in" better in society where the childless are still seen as outcasts, especially in the Christian circle
4) to feel accomplished
5) to have a meaningful close bond with another person, perhaps the closest bond is between parent and child (I think this is the only good reason, the above four seem a bit selfish)

The main reasons why I don't want a child/children:
1) A lot of work, not sure I can cope esp. if the marriage is bad or if I get sick
2) introducing possible sorrow into my life (if the child is "bad", disease, etc.)

 

[cv5]

I had one child, he is 33 now. If I had to do it over I would have had at least 5. No one has been blown up with a nuclear bomb yet, he did not turn gay, and even with the heart ache of teen age rebellion I am living to see him mature to be a man of character who wants to serve God which is what I prayed for for many years. I don't think the world is such a horrible place that your kids cannot have a happy life and make it to heaven. Train them up in the way they should go and when they are old they will not depart.

Some the greatest heroes (if not THE greatest) heroes of the Bible were bachelors and childless.
On the other hand the icons of the Bible who were having kids were lurching from one family, economic or situational disaster to another.

It may have escaped your notice but everyone died in the flood of Noah. And the vast vast majority of the world is going to die in this coming judgment. Even Gods people Israel ended up being wreckage, despite the best start possible. Their suffering has been absolutely horrible over the last 2000 years. Despite all of Gods attention, love, care, and long-suffering they were bad sons and they just blew it. What a disaster. And they brought it upon themselves, in self-destructive madness. Only by the Grace of God were they preserved, they certainly had nothing to offer in and of themselves.

Nope. Freedom is priceless.

 

[Scribe]

I disagree that we are required to marry and/or have children, based on what Paul says. The Bible does not say that we need to have at least one child. However, I do believe children are blessings. I agree that there are a lot of parents out there who shouldn't be parents (people who neglect or abuse their kids).

The main reasons why I want a child/children:
1) so I won't be lonely when I'm old, so someone will take care of me
2) so I don't feel "incomplete," always wondering if being childless caused a void in my life
3) so I "fit in" better in society where the childless are still seen as outcasts, especially in the Christian circle
4) to feel accomplished
5) to have a meaningful close bond with another person, perhaps the closest bond is between parent and child (I think this is the only good reason, the above four seem a bit selfish)

The main reasons why I don't want a child/children:
1) A lot of work, not sure I can cope esp. if the marriage is bad or if I get sick
2) introducing possible sorrow into my life (if the child is "bad", disease, etc.)

You forgot about Farm Hands. Who is going to feed the pigs?

 

[cv5]

You forgot about Farm Hands. Who is going to feed the pigs?

Historically those would be the slaves that the wicked king has conquered.

But I have to commend your honesty, as that is generally the real reason people have kids....Purely selfish motivation with no thought for the children. Once a pastor admitted to me that the REAL motivation in this life was to "build a dynasty". That was it for me I was out of there never to return lol.

 

[Scribe]

Some the greatest heroes (if not THE greatest) heroes of the Bible were bachelors and childless.

"I am still fond of the idea of continuing my family tree. My 5th great grand father was a fronteirsman pioneer out of Kentucky that was one of the first to settle land in Cole County Illinois he didn't really settle much, he hunted game and moved further west as soon as the game got scarce. He was the stuff history movies are made of and now my son who is very much into the outdoors himself is still not married and yet to have grandchildren.
I am might have to reconsider my decision to stay single and celibate and get me a wife who is interested in having five babies to carry on my genealogy before I get too old. If I start having kinds now I will only be 77 when they start going to college. That's not too old.

 

[cv5]

I disagree that we are required to marry and/or have children, based on what Paul says. The Bible does not say that we need to have at least one child. However, I do believe children are blessings. I agree that there are a lot of parents out there who shouldn't be parents (people who neglect or abuse their kids).

The main reasons why I want a child/children:
1) so I won't be lonely when I'm old, so someone will take care of me
2) so I don't feel "incomplete," always wondering if being childless caused a void in my life
3) so I "fit in" better in society where the childless are still seen as outcasts, especially in the Christian circle
4) to feel accomplished
5) to have a meaningful close bond with another person, perhaps the closest bond is between parent and child (I think this is the only good reason, the above four seem a bit selfish)

The main reasons why I don't want a child/children:
1) A lot of work, not sure I can cope esp. if the marriage is bad or if I get sick
2) introducing possible sorrow into my life (if the child is "bad", disease, etc.)

Frankly such selfish motivations are perfectly Scriptural. I have yet to see such reasoning being condemned. It is perfectly clear from the Scripture that God literally ALLOWED Esau, Moab, Ammon, Ishmael, etc to build their families and therefore their kingdoms. God literally allotted the tribes of this world their kingdoms and their lands.

I want absolutely nothing to do with dynasties, kingdoms, families or lands. All I care about is Christ Jesus and His Righteousness Salvation and Kingdom.

If anybody wants this wreckage world go ahead and take it. It's completely worthless as it's going to be destroyed.

 

[TheIndianGirl]

I think many people who have kids, a lot of them do not think too deep about it especially if they are young. They fall in love, get married, have sex, oops, then get pregnant, or sometimes it's just have sex, and then oops, they are pregnant. These people do not have a motivation for having kids.

 

[cv5]

"I am still fond of the idea of continuing my family tree. My 5th great grand father was a fronteirsman pioneer out of Kentucky that was one of the first to settle land in Cole County Illinois he didn't really settle much, he hunted game and moved further west as soon as the game got scarce. He was the stuff history movies are made of and now my son who is very much into the outdoors himself is still not married and yet to have grandchildren.
I am might have to reconsider my decision to stay single and celibate and get me a wife who is interested in having five babies to carry on my genealogy before I get too old. If I start having kinds now I will only be 77 when they start going to college. That's not too old.

This entire existence will be forgotten in the Kingdom to come.....exactly as the memory of the generations/civilization before the flood has been completely wiped out. Gone irrelevant wiped out. Sophomoric yearnings and fond memories will be wiped out as well.