What Are Some Stereotypes That People Believe About You, and How Do You Handle Them?

[seoulsearch]

Hey Everyone,

Some posts in another thread here in Singles brought me right back to the days of the kids on the playground (of a Lutheran school, no less,) at the library, and in the neighborhood "slanting" their eyes at me and calling me, "the little Chinese girl" (plot twist: I am not Chinese) along with other various racial stereotypes. This had me thinking about the stereotypes that EVERYONE faces at some point in our lives.

What have people assumed about you because of your race, gender, or social status?

For example, what goes through your mind when you hear:

* All (people of one race, group, ethnicity) (are like this, speak that, do all of the following stereotypical behaviors.)

And, it's certainly NOT just about race. How about these?

* Single people are (lazy, hopeless, wreckless, party all the time,) etc.

* Single adult men must be (I'm sure you can fill in the blanks.)

* Single adult women must be single because (fill in your reasons here.)

* Men only care about looks and sex.

* Women only care about prestige and money.

* Skinny people must be that way because (they're anorexic, they don't eat, they have a problem.)

* People who are overweight are that way because (they're lazy, they can't stop themselves, they refuse to do anything about it.)

* Pretty people have it all, and don't have to worry about anything

* Ugly people are always ignored.

* Rich people don't have to worry about anything.

* Poor people could do better if they just tried harder.

Has anyone ever assumed any of these things about you?

When I was younger, I would usually crumble because I was so shocked at how unbelievably cruel people can be. These days, I try my best to run right into a challenge head-on instead of backing down, and, when possible, I'll often try deflect it with a bit of humor when I can (however, some things, of course, are just too serious to make jokes about.)

How about the rest of you?

* What stereotypes have people assumed about YOU (and still assume about you today?)

* How do you choose to handle it? Is it different than how you used to react in the past? If, so, why?

Thank you for sharing, and I'm looking forward to hearing your answers.

 

[UCA4J]

Hey Everyone,

Some posts in another thread here in Singles brought me right back to the days of the kids on the playground (of a Lutheran school, no less,) at the library, and in the neighborhood "slanting" their eyes at me and calling me, "the little Chinese girl" (plot twist: I am not Chinese) along with other various racial stereotypes. This had me thinking about the stereotypes that EVERYONE faces at some point in our lives.

What have people assumed about you because of your race, gender, or social status?

For example, what goes through your mind when you hear:

* All (people of one race, group, ethnicity) (are like this, speak that, do all of the following stereotypical behaviors.)

And, it's certainly NOT just about race. How about these?

* Single people are (lazy, hopeless, wreckless, party all the time,) etc.

* Single adult men must be (I'm sure you can fill in the blanks.)

* Single adult women must be single because (fill in your reasons here.)

* Men only care about looks and sex.

* Women only care about prestige and money.

* Skinny people must be that way because (they're anorexic, they don't eat, they have a problem.)

* People who are overweight are that way because (they're lazy, they can't stop themselves, they refuse to do anything about it.)

* Pretty people have it all, and don't have to worry about anything

* Ugly people are always ignored.

* Rich people don't have to worry about anything.

* Poor people could do better if they just tried harder.

Has anyone ever assumed any of these things about you?

When I was younger, I would usually crumble because I was so shocked at how unbelievably cruel people can be. These days, I try my best to run right into a challenge head-on instead of backing down, and, when possible, I'll often try deflect it with a bit of humor when I can (however, some things, of course, are just too serious to make jokes about.)

How about the rest of you?

* What stereotypes have people assumed about YOU (and still assume about you today?)

* How do you choose to handle it? Is it different than how you used to react in the past? If, so, why?

Thank you for sharing, and I'm looking forward to hearing your answers.

😆😆😆 you had to do it ...

 

[seoulsearch]

😆😆😆 you had to do it ...

Ditto to you, Sir.

Ironically, you felt you had to do it first, and I am simply following your lead.

As a kid, I used to take crap like this all the time. As an adult, my thinking has changed. The only thing that's really changed in social circles now is that expressing such beliefs is considered to be "less polite", but the belief in the stereotypes are all still there, as you have so beautifully demonstrated.

These days, when I see opinions like yours, I'm thinking of my nieces and nephews, who still get asked utterly stupid questions like the one you keep on repeating in another thread -- i.e, your "Do you speak Ching Chong?" -- on a daily basis from the other kids at school.

Some people might accept this garbage and just overlook it, but if I have any chance to stand up to it, I most certainly will.

You have often complained here that women hardly talk to you.

I can't imagine why.

Even if they did, it would probably be in a language you would just insult anyway.

 

[seoulsearch]

😆😆😆 you had to do it ...

Take a look back through my posting/thread history, and you'll see that this is always how I've dealt with online bullying, racism, and ignorance, throughout the entire time I've been on this site.

I understand that you're newer to the forum and unaccustomed to this, but for me, it's just my own standard operating procedure.

 

[UCA4J]

Ditto to you, Sir.

Ironically, you felt you had to do it first, and I am simply following your lead.

As a kid, I used to take crap like this all the time. As an adult, my thinking has changed. The only thing that's really changed in social circles now is that expressing such beliefs is considered to be "less polite", but the belief in the stereotypes are all still there, as you have so beautifully demonstrated.

These days, when I see opinions like yours, I'm thinking of my nieces and nephews, who still get asked utterly stupid questions like the one you keep on repeating in another thread -- i.e, your "Do you speak Ching Chong?" -- on a daily basis from the other kids at school.

Some people might accept this garbage and just overlook it, but if I have any chance to stand up to it, I most certainly will.

You have often complained here that women hardly talk to you.

I can't imagine why.

Even if they did, it would probably be in a language you would just insult anyway.

you .... following my lead ...

I hardly think that would be so ..

 

[UCA4J]

Take a look back through my posting/thread history, and you'll see that this is always how I've dealt with online bullying, racism, and ignorance, throughout the entire time I've been on this site.

I understand that you're newer to the forum and unaccustomed to this, but for me, it's just my own standard operating procedure.

ok, that's your choice, but me calling a spade a spade, isn't racist.
A spade is a spade, not a fork, or any other piece of gardening tool ..

 

[seoulsearch]

ok, that's your choice, but me calling a spade a spade, isn't racist.
A spade is a spade, not a fork, or any other piece of gardening tool ..

Insisting on calling Asian languages "Ching Chong" is calling a spade a spade to you?

As I asked you in another post, do you insist that Mexican people speak "Taco" as well?

 

[seoulsearch]

ok, that's your choice, but me calling a spade a spade, isn't racist.
A spade is a spade, not a fork, or any other piece of gardening tool ..

My objective is never to try to "win" an argument with people who think the way you do. I know it's something that can't be immediately changed, and is certainly not a battle that can be "won."

Rather, the purpose of my threads and questions is to find out more about why that person thinks the way they do -- and how they react when put up against their own line of reasoning -- as well as learning about other people's feelings and experiences about the subject matter along the way.

 

[Lynx]

Stereotypes, I've heard a few
But then again, too few to mention...

As a single white guy, safely ensconced in the middle of the USA, I don't get a lot of racial stereotypes. Social ones though, I get some of them every day.

As a guy who takes his job seriously and tries to do it well, I get a lot of flak from lazy people on the job who look bad when I'm in the room. You wouldn't believe the stereotypes they come up with to try to excuse their own torpor.

As a single guy I get people assuming I have a lot of free time. That's fine though... because I actually do, and I'm usually happy to help. If I happen to not have time right now, I just tell them I can't at the moment.

But the REAL fun comes with music!

See, there are some people who lock down on one or two styles of music and consider everything else garbage. For these people it seems impossible to believe that one could like a lot of different music styles. So when they catch me listening to... Christian heavy metal, for example... they automatically assume I don't like styles that they believe conflict with metal.

The fun part is when they find out I know about the Hinsons, Hemphills, Gold City Quartet and I have really a lot of Gaithers and Cathedrals in my collection. Their shock is quite amusing.

 

[Lynx]

ok, that's your choice, but me calling a spade a spade, isn't racist.
A spade is a spade, not a fork, or any other piece of gardening tool ..

By your logic, and because you live in Australia, I should naturally assume you are a criminal of some kind.

A spade is a spade, after all.

 

[seoulsearch]

you .... following my lead ...

I hardly think that would be so ..

The French girl you have been so desperate to find -- you said she had your picture, but did she ever give you a picture of her, or tell you what her ethnic makeup was?

I am just curious -- what if she had turned out to be Asian? Seeing as you talked about how annoying you find Asians to be in one of your posts, would you have dropped her immediately if she would have been? Because even if she did post/give you a photo, it might not have really been her.

And what if she were half-Asian, or another, lesser than 100% mix? Would you have given her a chance?

Would you have still spoken to her the same way you are speaking to @Reborn, myself, and apparently all the other Asians here?

I'm not saying that people aren't allowed to dislike Asians -- that's between them and God -- but what I am asking is, if you would have found out that this girl whom you were convinced you were meant to talk to and perhaps even marry would have been Asian, would you have broken your own stereotypes in order to talk to her?

And if so, why would it suddenly be ok in that situation?

 

[UCA4J]

Insisting on calling Asian languages "Ching Chong" is calling a spade a spade to you?

As I asked you in another post, do you insist that Mexican people speak "Taco" as well?

well, I haven't had the opportunity to hear, in person, what language a Mexican speaks, so to answer that for you, I don't have an answer, at the moment.

 

[UCA4J]

By your logic, and because you live in Australia, I should naturally assume you are a criminal of some kind.

A spade is a spade, after all.

well, I have a buzz cut once a month.
And I have been called a criminal, by a slightly older woman, who is in police, for having such short hair.
And she's a Christian.

 

[UCA4J]

The French girl you have been so desperate to find -- you said she had your picture, but did she ever give you a picture of her, or tell you what her ethnic makeup was?

I am just curious -- what if she had turned out to be Asian? Seeing as you talked about how annoying you find Asians to be in one of your posts, would you have dropped her immediately if she would have been? Because even if she did post/give you a photo, it might not have really been her.

And what if she were half-Asian, or another, lesser than 100% mix? Would you have given her a chance?

Would you have still spoken to her the same way you are speaking to @Reborn, myself, and apparently all the other Asians here?

I'm not saying that people aren't allowed to dislike Asians -- that's between them and God -- but what I am asking is, if you would have found out that this girl whom you were convinced you were meant to talk to and perhaps even marry would have been Asian, would you have broken your own stereotypes in order to talk to her?

And if so, why would it suddenly be ok in that situation?

well, I don't have a pic of her.
I don't want a preconceived ideas of what she looks like till I meet her.

As for being Asian, I really hope not.

Do you think God would give me an Asian wife?

Surely no 😆

 

[seoulsearch]

well, I haven't had the opportunity to hear, in person, what language a Mexican speaks, so to answer that for you, I don't have an answer, at the moment.

You've never once been around people of Mexican, Latino, or Hispanic origin enough to hear them speaking in their own languages?

I realize I could actually be the one who is naive here, as maybe you have truly never been exposed to many people from other cultures...?

So this is how you approach it? You listen to someone speak in another language, then make up your own name with which to call it, and then ask the person if they speak (your own made up name for their) language?

These are actually serious questions, as now I am quite interested in your thought process.

 

[seoulsearch]

well, I don't have a pic of her.
I don't want a preconceived ideas of what she looks like till I meet her.

As for being Asian, I really hope not.

Do you think God would give me an Asian wife?

Surely no 😆

You are definitely right about that.

For her sake, I hope He would spare her the grief.

This is just me, but I certainly hope God wouldn't command me to marry someone who doesn't like my race.

 

[Lynx]

well, I have a buzz cut once a month.
And I have been called a criminal, by a slightly older woman, who is in police, for having such short hair.
And she's a Christian.

I can't believe anybody still has such an antiquated hair stereotype. I've been getting a buzz cut for more than a decade - it's much more efficient - and not one single person has speculated I might be a criminal for any reason.

Maybe we just don't do stereotypes much in the area where I live.

 

[seoulsearch]

well, I haven't had the opportunity to hear, in person, what language a Mexican speaks, so to answer that for you, I don't have an answer, at the moment.

Now I wish I could get people who speak other languages to send you voice clips of them speaking in their native tongues, just to see what you would personally "label" each language.

 

[UCA4J]

You've never once been around people of Mexican, Latino, or Hispanic origin enough to hear them speaking in their own languages?

I realize I could actually be the one who is naive here, as maybe you have truly never been exposed to many people from other cultures...?

So this is how you approach it? You listen to someone speak in another language, then make up your own name with which to call it, and then ask the person if they speak (your own made up name for their) language?

These are actually serious questions, as now I am quite interested in your thought process.

where I live, there are different ethnicities, such as Chinese.
In Sydney, two hours south of me, is where most ethnicities are.
And I don't visit Sydney, much.
There could be some Italians, Germans, Czechs and wherever else.
No Mexicans that I know of.
I'd say mostly Chinese.
Some kiwis as well.

 

[UCA4J]

Now I wish I could get people who speak other languages to send you voice clips of them speaking in their native tongues, just to see what you would personally "label" each language.

is it "racist" of me to say a french person speaks French ?
Or someone in Ireland speaks Irish ?