How do I find a super shy introvert wife?
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Hi again and thanks for your feedback.
I actually thought about making my search in the church as it could probably be the place where I can find the largest concentration of women of that profile (and at the same time Christian). Even there I would have to sweep mines though, but like in anywhere else really. The doubt is how am I supposed to approach a woman in a church? I only have got the two periods just before the mass and after the mass to interact with people, and if I do things 'naturally' I will most likely scare the woman off and suggest people that I have got creepy intentions towards her. Let alone if the woman goes to church with her family... I think guidance in this area would be useful.
Aside from that, it is not really that hard for two introverts to interact with each other. Making the first move is the hardest part actually, but I will try if opportunity comes. After that just talk about the things we are doing in the moment, if it's the church talk about Jesus and the Scriptures, if it's the library about the book she is reading, if it's the grocery about the food she is buying etc. Okay I will admit I have no experience with male-female relationships but this is the vibe I get in my head about how does it work. But then I guess the woman of my desire does not either. And it's not hard to make connections too. The fact that we are two introverts already creates a strong bond between us. And then we will look for common tastes, hobbies, values, goals, and all that stuff. Especially in the sense that we are not unequally yoked later in marriage. This of course will take its time, like everything in this life.
Honestly I have heard all that 'love will conquer all' story, and I think people who believe in that must have some kind of stupidity issues, or what I like to call Disney syndrome. Sadly a lot of women especially have it and harm everybody they have relationships with because of this. It all begins with the Prince Charming Disney cartoons and later continues with all the gangsters & bad boys films. TV and Internet have destroyed relationships. This toxic love is all mentality is responsible for most of the adultery and divorces these days. It has been a good topic to mention. As for my conditions and plans I will admit I am yet to do most of these stuff, though I'm not in a hurry to find the woman of my life. All this requires a great patience and effort not all people possess. This doesn't mean though that I struggle with desires (because I do A LOT) but I try to keep them inside so that they don't damage my life. I will save the maximum money possible so that I don't happen to come short later in life (or at least minimize the risk), and I will make sure the woman I marry is not a money sucker either. I sure won't want a ton of cosmetics, phones and expensive clothes empty my incomes.
I actually thought about making my search in the church as it could probably be the place where I can find the largest concentration of women of that profile (and at the same time Christian). Even there I would have to sweep mines though, but like in anywhere else really. The doubt is how am I supposed to approach a woman in a church? I only have got the two periods just before the mass and after the mass to interact with people, and if I do things 'naturally' I will most likely scare the woman off and suggest people that I have got creepy intentions towards her. Let alone if the woman goes to church with her family... I think guidance in this area would be useful.
Aside from that, it is not really that hard for two introverts to interact with each other. Making the first move is the hardest part actually, but I will try if opportunity comes. After that just talk about the things we are doing in the moment, if it's the church talk about Jesus and the Scriptures, if it's the library about the book she is reading, if it's the grocery about the food she is buying etc. Okay I will admit I have no experience with male-female relationships but this is the vibe I get in my head about how does it work. But then I guess the woman of my desire does not either. And it's not hard to make connections too. The fact that we are two introverts already creates a strong bond between us. And then we will look for common tastes, hobbies, values, goals, and all that stuff. Especially in the sense that we are not unequally yoked later in marriage. This of course will take its time, like everything in this life.
Honestly I have heard all that 'love will conquer all' story, and I think people who believe in that must have some kind of stupidity issues, or what I like to call Disney syndrome. Sadly a lot of women especially have it and harm everybody they have relationships with because of this. It all begins with the Prince Charming Disney cartoons and later continues with all the gangsters & bad boys films. TV and Internet have destroyed relationships. This toxic love is all mentality is responsible for most of the adultery and divorces these days. It has been a good topic to mention. As for my conditions and plans I will admit I am yet to do most of these stuff, though I'm not in a hurry to find the woman of my life. All this requires a great patience and effort not all people possess. This doesn't mean though that I struggle with desires (because I do A LOT) but I try to keep them inside so that they don't damage my life. I will save the maximum money possible so that I don't happen to come short later in life (or at least minimize the risk), and I will make sure the woman I marry is not a money sucker either. I sure won't want a ton of cosmetics, phones and expensive clothes empty my incomes.
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Yes.
All of these same ideas were repeated multiple times in the other threads that were listed in my earlier post, all with an emphasis on all the evil, horrible cheating women out there (henceforth why she must be kept dependent ay home and not allowed to talk to anyone else.)
Please have a look at them.
All of these same ideas were repeated multiple times in the other threads that were listed in my earlier post, all with an emphasis on all the evil, horrible cheating women out there (henceforth why she must be kept dependent ay home and not allowed to talk to anyone else.)
Please have a look at them.
Oh don't worry, it's coming.
Pretty soon he'll start explaining how he has to find a woman he can protect from committing adultery by keeping her at home, never letting her go to school, get a job, or talk to anyone else so she can solely focus on worshipping him. And how on earth can he find this young, perfect angel.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I could be wrong.
I actually wish I were. I never understand what drives someone to repeatedly eat up people's time like this when they never actually want or listen to real answers.
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Yes.
Now if I may ask again, please go read at least the first few pages of the other threads I listed, and tell us what you think of the answers that were given.
Because they answer all the questions you're asking here.
Several times.
I'll be very interested in what you have to say about them, because just as the same questions keep being asked and the same ideas keep being repeated, so will the same answers.
Now if I may ask again, please go read at least the first few pages of the other threads I listed, and tell us what you think of the answers that were given.
Because they answer all the questions you're asking here.
Several times.
I'll be very interested in what you have to say about them, because just as the same questions keep being asked and the same ideas keep being repeated, so will the same answers.
I applaud you for wanting to save for the future -- that's definitely a step in the right direction.
But since you've said that you don't want your wife to "empty your income" with "tons of cosmetics, phones, and expensive clothes," may I ask:
* Do you plan for your wife to work and be able to contribute?
* What do you think of her going to college for a higher education and higher paying career?
* What if a "need" arose for things like cosmetics?
I am currently following the story of a young (early 20's, I think), very beautiful (blonde hair, bright blue eyes) Christian gal on YouTube. She is married, and is experiencing a terrible reaction to the birth control method she and her husband prayerfully chose.
I watched her latest video last night in which her entire face is full of angry red splotches and covered in countless painful blemishes. She is undergoing treatment by a doctor and dermatologist, but in the meantime, she does use cosmetics for when she has to go out into the world. People judge you by what they see, and if they see someone's skin in that condition, they will often make unjust assumptions and unwanted comments about the person's appearance and hygiene. They may even think that the person has some kind of contagious disease.
Having had several skin challenges in my own life, I can certainly sympathize with what this poor girl is going through. I can also testify that in these cases, the lesser quality (usually cheaper) skincare products only make things worse, and expensive treatment and products often become a necessity.
* How would you feel about your wife spending money on these things if she felt a need for them for her own health?
* You mentioned having hobbies in common. How would you feel about your wife spending money on hobbies?
I went through a time in my life when, if I was ever wearing a dress, it was one that I had made myself. But I'll be the first to admit that sewing is not at all a cheap hobby. I'm certainly not trying to say it's only for the wealthy either, but you do have to save up quite a bit in order to buy the tools and supplies you need, even if they're all secondhand.
I know several other women with hobbies such as papercrafts (making and sending homemade cards,) knitting/crochet, baking, etc., and every such hobby requires a substantial amount of money.
* What do you think of your income being used on such things, or would you want for her to work and be able to earn her own money towards her own hobbies?
But since you've said that you don't want your wife to "empty your income" with "tons of cosmetics, phones, and expensive clothes," may I ask:
* Do you plan for your wife to work and be able to contribute?
* What do you think of her going to college for a higher education and higher paying career?
* What if a "need" arose for things like cosmetics?
I am currently following the story of a young (early 20's, I think), very beautiful (blonde hair, bright blue eyes) Christian gal on YouTube. She is married, and is experiencing a terrible reaction to the birth control method she and her husband prayerfully chose.
I watched her latest video last night in which her entire face is full of angry red splotches and covered in countless painful blemishes. She is undergoing treatment by a doctor and dermatologist, but in the meantime, she does use cosmetics for when she has to go out into the world. People judge you by what they see, and if they see someone's skin in that condition, they will often make unjust assumptions and unwanted comments about the person's appearance and hygiene. They may even think that the person has some kind of contagious disease.
Having had several skin challenges in my own life, I can certainly sympathize with what this poor girl is going through. I can also testify that in these cases, the lesser quality (usually cheaper) skincare products only make things worse, and expensive treatment and products often become a necessity.
* How would you feel about your wife spending money on these things if she felt a need for them for her own health?
* You mentioned having hobbies in common. How would you feel about your wife spending money on hobbies?
I went through a time in my life when, if I was ever wearing a dress, it was one that I had made myself. But I'll be the first to admit that sewing is not at all a cheap hobby. I'm certainly not trying to say it's only for the wealthy either, but you do have to save up quite a bit in order to buy the tools and supplies you need, even if they're all secondhand.
I know several other women with hobbies such as papercrafts (making and sending homemade cards,) knitting/crochet, baking, etc., and every such hobby requires a substantial amount of money.
* What do you think of your income being used on such things, or would you want for her to work and be able to earn her own money towards her own hobbies?
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