Obey thy heavenly father or earthly?

[InNeedOfSupport]

Im supremely lost right now.

About 4-5 years ago I had God who graced me with a path to leave for Western Canada and not to look back.

Every time I try to look for work, think about moving, etc. my own logic and fear tells me it does not make sense. I have no family, no friends, no job and if I leave I have no idea if life would be similar to what Im living now because wherever you go you're always with yourself, so would life be any different from the nothing Im living now?

Every person I talk to wishes I stay home. Well they want me to stay and not take the hasty decision to leave up to the point of telling me and making me doubt whether I should leave or not, providing me with similar arguments as mentioned.

With the entire Covid situation this did not help and made even less sense to leave. But I dont believe in Covid, Im diametrically opposed to my family on this, I dont believe in the house arrest style shutdowns that want to break society asunder and weaken health.

So which father do I obey? My atheist earthly father who wishes I stay, but who loves me just the same, or the Lord in heaven who so many moons ago told me to go.

I left my job, which was making me miserable, for this very reason because it maybe a test of faith to leave for Western Canada despite all my reservations. A challenge to overcome my fears and my lack of faith.

Right now Im jobless, my aims change day to day and I cant focus on one path, my mother no longer wants me in my bedroom, we differ too much on the state of things with regards to Covid, wants me to live outside, but Ive been stuck with this internal conflict. Should I accept my fate, find a job in my home city, rebuild myself here and then leave or should I focus all my efforts to leave now?

 

[Aerials1978]

Honor your father and mother. This does not mean you have to relinquish to their wishes if they are not in line with Gods word. For Christ said; “Do not think that I have come to bringpeace to the earth. I have not come to bringpeace, but a sword. For I have come tto set aman against his father, and a daughter againsther mother, and a daughter-in-law against hermother-in-law. And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household”

Just make sure your motives are pure and not out of spitefulness. If you seek, the Lord will guide. Pray. May the Father of us all direct you in all truth.

 

[Magenta]

Acting on something you have had under consideration for 4-5 years is not making a hasty decision.

 

[Dino246]

Im supremely lost right now.

About 4-5 years ago I had God who graced me with a path to leave for Western Canada and not to look back.

Every time I try to look for work, think about moving, etc. my own logic and fear tells me it does not make sense. I have no family, no friends, no job and if I leave I have no idea if life would be similar to what Im living now because wherever you go you're always with yourself, so would life be any different from the nothing Im living now?

Every person I talk to wishes I stay home. Well they want me to stay and not take the hasty decision to leave up to the point of telling me and making me doubt whether I should leave or not, providing me with similar arguments as mentioned.

With the entire Covid situation this did not help and made even less sense to leave. But I dont believe in Covid, Im diametrically opposed to my family on this, I dont believe in the house arrest style shutdowns that want to break society asunder and weaken health.

So which father do I obey? My atheist earthly father who wishes I stay, but who loves me just the same, or the Lord in heaven who so many moons ago told me to go.

I left my job, which was making me miserable, for this very reason because it maybe a test of faith to leave for Western Canada despite all my reservations. A challenge to overcome my fears and my lack of faith.

Right now Im jobless, my aims change day to day and I cant focus on one path, my mother no longer wants me in my bedroom, we differ too much on the state of things with regards to Covid, wants me to live outside, but Ive been stuck with this internal conflict. Should I accept my fate, find a job in my home city, rebuild myself here and then leave or should I focus all my efforts to leave now?

Welcome to CC...

You don't share your age, so we are somewhat limited in the feedback we can offer. If you are 18 or older, you are free to do as you choose, and need not "obey" your parents. You are only required to honour them, which is different. If you are still living in their home, you are right to abide by the house rules though.

If you are under 18, I would suggest that you obey your parents, as long as they are not requiring you to do anything sinful, illegal, or contrary to sound judgment (all may require discussion with your parents as you present your case). Reasonable parents will listen to your side and consider it, even if they disagree.

As for the current 'pandemic', do the research for yourself and act accordingly, with the understanding that respecting the rights and choices of others may involve doing things that you find disagreeable, for the sake of interpersonal harmony.

I'd suggest you humble yourself, get a job, and ask your heavenly Father for peace, provision, and self-control. Western Canada may be calling, and if so, it will still be calling when you have some resources tucked away and a little more maturity and wisdom to work with.

 

[Magenta]

The future is an unknown, but God is not. He has plans to prosper you and not to harm you. This is true whether you plan to stay or go. There could be better plans for you in the west. How would you know either way? Try to imagine living your life doing just the things other people want you to do. Does not look very appealing to me at all, speaking for myself and my own life It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.

 

[TheIndianGirl]

Im supremely lost right now.

About 4-5 years ago I had God who graced me with a path to leave for Western Canada and not to look back.

Every time I try to look for work, think about moving, etc. my own logic and fear tells me it does not make sense. I have no family, no friends, no job and if I leave I have no idea if life would be similar to what Im living now because wherever you go you're always with yourself, so would life be any different from the nothing Im living now?

Every person I talk to wishes I stay home. Well they want me to stay and not take the hasty decision to leave up to the point of telling me and making me doubt whether I should leave or not, providing me with similar arguments as mentioned.

With the entire Covid situation this did not help and made even less sense to leave. But I dont believe in Covid, Im diametrically opposed to my family on this, I dont believe in the house arrest style shutdowns that want to break society asunder and weaken health.

So which father do I obey? My atheist earthly father who wishes I stay, but who loves me just the same, or the Lord in heaven who so many moons ago told me to go.

I left my job, which was making me miserable, for this very reason because it maybe a test of faith to leave for Western Canada despite all my reservations. A challenge to overcome my fears and my lack of faith.

Right now Im jobless, my aims change day to day and I cant focus on one path, my mother no longer wants me in my bedroom, we differ too much on the state of things with regards to Covid, wants me to live outside, but Ive been stuck with this internal conflict. Should I accept my fate, find a job in my home city, rebuild myself here and then leave or should I focus all my efforts to leave now?

I an going to assume you are an adult, and so do not need to "obey" your parents. So it seems your mother wants you leave the house but your dad wants you to stay in the house? Regardless, it seems both your parents and wider family want you to at least stay nearby. They could have selfish reasons or legitimate reasons (you aren't ready/responsible), etc.

However even though your family doesn't seem too encouraging about you moving, it seems like the biggest reason stopping you is you, as you said God already told you to move. You said you have a fear of being all alone and jobless, and also indicated that life may not be much different from living at home without the comforts. These are legitimate concerns but at some point if you want to move, you need to take the plunge, whether it is now, 5 years, or 10 years. I recommend sending a bunch of job applications to your destination city before moving; it would be best if you had some job lined up before you left. You can always come back to your home city if you "failed".

 

[Magenta]

I quit my job of a year and a half (at the time) and came out west at the age of 22 with $200.00 in my pocket. I secured an apartment the day after arriving, and a job the following day. Things may have changed a lot in the world since then, but God's faithfulness has not.

 

[InNeedOfSupport]

I quit my job of a year and a half (at the time) and came out west at the age of 22 with $200.00 in my pocket. I secured an apartment the day after arriving, and a job the following day. Things may have changed a lot in the world since then, but God's faithfulness has not.

Feel free to answer or not, don't want to impose but, How did you do it? How did you find a place to rent? How did you find the job? What motivated you to go?

I'm 27 and I feel like I need hand holding... Hell my life has been only hand holding and that's what I'm sick of I'm a hot blooded male not some lil kid anymore! It's my reason for doing it, I've always been in the "passenger/kid seat" in my life as I'm handed food, house, clothing from my parents. My parents have done everything for me and I'm grateful but I've never had to face a challenge/fend for myself. I feel so damned stunted and it has to end, either through living in the downstairs apartment or making the leap of faith to the West.

 

[tourist]

Your need for hand holding is holding you back. "Go west, young man". Some guy said that a long time ago.

 

[Magenta]

Feel free to answer or not, don't want to impose but, How did you do it? How did you find a place to rent? How did you find the job? What motivated you to go?

I'm 27 and I feel like I need hand holding... Hell my life has been only hand holding and that's what I'm sick of I'm a hot blooded male not some lil kid anymore! It's my reason for doing it, I've always been in the "passenger/kid seat" in my life as I'm handed food, house, clothing from my parents. My parents have done everything for me and I'm grateful but I've never had to face a challenge/fend for myself. I feel so damned stunted and it has to end, either through living in the downstairs apartment or making the leap of faith to the West.

Hello Well, my life has been quite different from yours. Just an example: I left home at 18, and then when I wanted to go to college a year later and applied for a student loan, I had to get a signed thing from my parents attesting to the fact that they would not support me financially in this endeavor. I had been brought up well, with numerous siblings, in a fairly strict religious home and I rebelled = why they would not support me. My dad may have but my mother forbade it. Any way... I was motivated to leave for a number of reasons. In a sense I felt called, though I was not a believer at the time. But the west did beckon, and I did not care for my life where I was, so I up and left. In hind sight I do credit God with many of the things that have worked out for me, including the job I left behind, because it was my first job in the industry of my choice. I had not wanted to do anything else, and continued working in that field for the rest of my working life (until covid struck two years ago, when I was laid off [after thirty eight years at the same place of employment] concurrently with that, turning 65, and a cancer diagnosis). In forty four years I worked at only three different places, the last one for thirty eight years.

You may just need to have the courage of your convictions. This does not mean you will never need moral or emotional support to help you navigate changes in your life, whether anticipated and/or planed, or unexpected. (1) Figuring out what you want and going after it seems better by far than (2) trying to live up to the expectations of other, because in the first you may fail, but can always start again and keep moving forward, but in the second, you will always inevitably fail.

 

[wintersrain]

Im supremely lost right now.

About 4-5 years ago I had God who graced me with a path to leave for Western Canada and not to look back.

Every time I try to look for work, think about moving, etc. my own logic and fear tells me it does not make sense. I have no family, no friends, no job and if I leave I have no idea if life would be similar to what Im living now because wherever you go you're always with yourself, so would life be any different from the nothing Im living now?

Every person I talk to wishes I stay home. Well they want me to stay and not take the hasty decision to leave up to the point of telling me and making me doubt whether I should leave or not, providing me with similar arguments as mentioned.

With the entire Covid situation this did not help and made even less sense to leave. But I dont believe in Covid, Im diametrically opposed to my family on this, I dont believe in the house arrest style shutdowns that want to break society asunder and weaken health.

So which father do I obey? My atheist earthly father who wishes I stay, but who loves me just the same, or the Lord in heaven who so many moons ago told me to go.

I left my job, which was making me miserable, for this very reason because it maybe a test of faith to leave for Western Canada despite all my reservations. A challenge to overcome my fears and my lack of faith.

Right now Im jobless, my aims change day to day and I cant focus on one path, my mother no longer wants me in my bedroom, we differ too much on the state of things with regards to Covid, wants me to live outside, but Ive been stuck with this internal conflict. Should I accept my fate, find a job in my home city, rebuild myself here and then leave or should I focus all my efforts to leave now?

Maybe what you feel called by God to do in moving to western Canada is not God at all. But is you wanting to leave a deeply depressing home environment.

I can't imagine living in a home where mom doesn't want me to be living. I feel for you.

As to advice for whether or not you should take the plunge and go to WC, I'd say no. You have nothing with which to make such a journey. And at least you now have a home and people who care about you.

The mom situation. Why not try to get a remote job? Work from home type thing. And pay a bit of rent to your parents when you do. This way your mom will see you're taking on responsibility in that regard. Because if you move to WC you're not going to be afforded the same comfort as you have now. A home rent free and with monetary support when you're unemployed.

Lastly, if you feel drawn to western Canada after that why not plan the move? You've thought about it for years but you've not prepared. You'll need a nest egg to make the journey. Money for rent, a security deposit and first months rent is not unusual to secure an apartment. You'll also need to show you can pay a lease term if you find one. Unless you find a place that is month to month.
The usual rule of thumb for apartments and rent is, you want your rent to be no more than a weeks net pay.

Do you have any employable skills? Or would you be working general labor jobs? Are you specially trained in any field? These are considerations if you want to move someplace away from your family home security that you have now.
Minimum wage is just that. The bare minimum. Especially in a time of inflation. If you don't have any specialized skills you can always plan ahead to better your options there too.

Get a job and then maybe pursue school in a field of study you would enjoy as a career. Night classes are an option for after work. Even remote college or university. Just make sure the school is accredited and that your credits would transfer to another institution should you decide to move your studies to a different school.

And , as you're maybe reflecting on what it is that's leading you to want to leave where you are now and for years, though you haven't yet done so, you might want to commit to some serious introspection in the meantime.
Make a list maybe. What is it you love about where you are living now, and where you are in your life. Being totally forthcoming because this is your private list. And it allows you to vent what's pent up inside you and may be leading you to flee your present situation.

Then make a list of what you dislike about your present situation and where you are in life.

Sometimes life is like Geology. Things change when extreme pressure is applied.

I hope you find your way to peace and happiness.

 

[TheIndianGirl]

Maybe what you feel called by God to do in moving to western Canada is not God at all. But is you wanting to leave a deeply depressing home environment.

I can't imagine living in a home where mom doesn't want me to be living. I feel for you.

As to advice for whether or not you should take the plunge and go to WC, I'd say no. You have nothing with which to make such a journey. And at least you now have a home and people who care about you.

The mom situation. Why not try to get a remote job? Work from home type thing. And pay a bit of rent to your parents when you do. This way your mom will see you're taking on responsibility in that regard. Because if you move to WC you're not going to be afforded the same comfort as you have now. A home rent free and with monetary support when you're unemployed.

Lastly, if you feel drawn to western Canada after that why not plan the move? You've thought about it for years but you've not prepared. You'll need a nest egg to make the journey. Money for rent, a security deposit and first months rent is not unusual to secure an apartment. You'll also need to show you can pay a lease term if you find one. Unless you find a place that is month to month.
The usual rule of thumb for apartments and rent is, you want your rent to be no more than a weeks net pay.

Do you have any employable skills? Or would you be working general labor jobs? Are you specially trained in any field? These are considerations if you want to move someplace away from your family home security that you have now.
Minimum wage is just that. The bare minimum. Especially in a time of inflation. If you don't have any specialized skills you can always plan ahead to better your options there too.

Get a job and then maybe pursue school in a field of study you would enjoy as a career. Night classes are an option for after work. Even remote college or university. Just make sure the school is accredited and that your credits would transfer to another institution should you decide to move your studies to a different school.

And , as you're maybe reflecting on what it is that's leading you to want to leave where you are now and for years, though you haven't yet done so, you might want to commit to some serious introspection in the meantime.
Make a list maybe. What is it you love about where you are living now, and where you are in your life. Being totally forthcoming because this is your private list. And it allows you to vent what's pent up inside you and may be leading you to flee your present situation.

Then make a list of what you dislike about your present situation and where you are in life.

Sometimes life is like Geology. Things change when extreme pressure is applied.

I hope you find your way to peace and happiness.

A lot of great advice. I do think the OP needs to be better prepared, if he isn't already, before heading west (education, job skills, some funds saved, etc.). The OP's main frustration seems to be feeling "stunted" due to the "hand-holding" he has had throughout his life. For that, I do think he has to get out of the parents' home even if it in the same city. He is 27 years old, it's not like he is 18 years old. There are pros/cons to living on his own too, cons including lack of comfort and loneliness at times.

 

[Billyd]

Just an observation.

2Th 3:10 For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat. KJV

You are 27 years old and still living with mom and dad. What are you going to do when mom and dad are gone?

Grow up. Take the plunge. Take the first job that you are offered. Do the job as if Jesus is looking over your shoulder. If you don't like the job, look for a better job. Until you get that better job, continue the current job as if it were the best job in the world.