S
This is a blog I wanted to write to get it off my chest. I hope that maybe this time it will actually get off my chest. In the past, I've tried and I still couldn't get it off my chest. You can pray for me! That is always appreciated! 
I hate the subject of Masturbation because the Bible does not specifically say anything about it. And I hate all the various ideas people have about it. So many are hurtful to me. Part of the reason is because I've done my own research and I don't come to happy conclusions.
Believers who say it's a sin, map it to Matthew 5:28, and then say, there is no way to Masturbate without lusting, either to porn, or to someone in your head, or to some imaginary somebody... Can you really lust after an imaginary girl?
According to what I've read on medical sites, they claim that men who masturbate are less likely to get prostate cancer.
My Dad had a Collage professor, A Bible Believer, who taught at a Conservative Christian Collage, actually say Masturbation is a God's gift to singles. Boy that doesn't go along with the current Christian trends that believes it's a sin.
I think Men and Women are different when it comes to Masturbation. I think Men do it because they want sexual release. I have no idea why Women do it.
I realize that nearly everyone will push against me on this point, but I currently feel that Lust is inescapable. The reason why I feel this way is because Lust and Sexual feelings seem to be intertwined together. Almost to the point, to where you can't have one without the other.
Believe it or not, I started Masturbating at the young age of 6. I remember thinking about somethings while doing it. And sometimes those thoughts had people in them. But it wasn't sexual. It wasn't until I was around 12 or 13, and a parent explained sex to me. Also we started having sex education at school too, that I my Masturbation thoughts turned sexual.
Porn was a confusing subject for me. The reason why, is because I didn't have access to Porn magazines. But I did have access to Avon, JcPenny, Sears, Lands End, and even Victoria Secret catalogs, that my Mom would just leave out on the coffee table! These were a huge temptation for a very horny teenage boy.
I felt conflicted because I was told that homosexuality was a sin, and I was happy that I was, at least, a straight guy! I was also told that Porn is bad, and yet these catalogs were a common household item. I remember wondering to myself, "Am I looking at porn?, it can't be porn because it's sitting out on our coffee table, and we don't allow porn in our house. We didn't even have cable TV because of all the bad shows."
I always struggled with reading, and I didn't have access to an audio bible. But I tried to read the book of John, and I even read Matthew. But that was just about all the Bible reading I got done back then. I remember coming across Matthew 5:28 and wondering to myself, "What on earth?" You mean just looking at women is a sin? It was so embarrassing that I couldn't figure out how to talk to my parents about this! Even now it's hard! That was one of the reasons why I bought the book "Every Man's Battle" I thought it might make a good conversation starter between me and my dad. I got the audio copy and listened to it, and one day I started telling him about the book. I even showed him the printed book, He took one look at it, and said "This is not going to help you". He is right, that thing brought me more conflict then anything else. I can't see how anyone lives up to the standards that Every Man's Battle puts on men. Because according to them, even a wet dream is lust. Last I knew you can't help your dreams!
Anyways that was not the only time i tried talking to my Dad about that. There was a time before that. I remember saying something about Matthew 5:28 and He said, "that is a tough one." And that was about as far as it goes... My dad did share with me that He has a little different view on lust then other people do. He said, that to him, lust is when you say in your heart that you would do anything to have sex with that person. Even though I have great respect for my Dad, I don't completely agree with that view. Because I can watch anything sensual, and feel a sexual high, but I wouldn't do anything to get with those women. Most of those sexy ladies I wouldn't even want to be around. Because I want to be around women who I click with. It is the woman that I get along with the best, would be the one I want to have sex with. Duh! Anyways that is why I have issues with his definition. It would have been nice of the Bible to have defined what it meant by the word Lust". Cause there is a lot of confusion with it.
*By the way, I tried to confess my problem to my youth pastor, and the senior pastor. I even went forward at Church got anointed with oil, and the congregation laid hands on me and prayed. But the congregation didn't know about the problems they were praying for me about.
I have often wondered how can a man date a girl without lusting after her? The other day I wanted to make my point, so I remembered something from a book by Mark Cahill. And so I quoted it.
Look! I think Mark is probably a good guy with good intentions. But when I posted the quote, He got criticized for this conversation. I don't understand why. It's a short quote, so that i could make my point. If you want to judge the author Mark, then get the book and read it! Or watch some of his videos on youtube. But don't judge people over just a little quote here and there. Ok?
Mark Cahill's witnessing methods is very similar to Ray Comfort's methods. He runs an unbeliever though the ten commandments to show them that they are not good enough to get into heaven. That is then supposed to lead them to the cross.
When Mark gets to the commandment "Don't commit adultery" He brings up Matthew 5:28. Which says "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." To tell the person He has a lust problem in his heart.
The Book "One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven" on page 123 and 124, He's talking to a guy. I want you to read how this conversation goes:
This Chapter is Called: "Guilty"
There maybe some typos, because I had to type a copy from the book.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I like to witness in the bar sections of towns, especially in the summer. These areas are usually bustling with people hanging outside or walking from bar to bar, and many of them are eager to engage in a conversation. On Saturday night in Buckhead, the bar area of Atlanta, I used my survey approach to begin a conversation with a couple in their early twenties.
After the young woman gave me an answer, the guy said, "There is a Heaven and a Hell. And when I die I am going to Heaven because I keep the Ten Commandments. " It didn't take long to get right to the point! "Okay," I began, "let's see how you are doing. Have you ever told a lie?"
He said, "Nope."
I was thinking, We have all told a lie. You just lied to me in your answer! So I responded, "What do you mean 'nope'?"
"I have only stretched the truth before."
He thought he had me, but I asked, "How far do you have to stretch the truth before it becomes a lie?" He smiled and admitted, "Okay, I
have lied before."
"What does that make you?" I asked.
"A liar."
"Have you ever stolen something?"
"Yes."
"What does that make you?"
"A thief."
I continued, "Have you ever lusted in your heart for a girl before?"
His answer was, "No."
His girlfriend quickly pointed a finger at him and said, "You've lusted for me before!" He's in trouble now! When she said that, he responded with a curse word -- it was the Lord's name in vain.
I said, "Wait a minute. There is another one you have broken! You are 0 for 4 and we have only gone through four of the Commandments! Would you be guilty or not guilty on Judgment Day? He said "guilty" and you know where we went from there. Using the Ten Commandments really is incredibly effective.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I haven't listened to this book since 2007 or 2008. But I can't remember Mark ever clarifying this point any farther... I know if He did, I would remember! Because this is a very touchy subject with me!
If my calculations are correct, a Man can not date a girl without lusting being in the mix.
If my calculation is correct, if that Man were to die before they got married, He would go to Hell.
Here is why I think that. Matthew 5:28 + 1 Corinthians 6:9-20.
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+5:28&version=NIV
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Corinthians+6:9-20&version=NIV
There is a verse that might put a catch in my thinking.
Ephesians 4:29-31
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians 4:29-31&version=NIV
If "sealed for the day of redemption" If that is like a promise ring kind of seal, then any of us can choose to take it off, and therefor forfeit our salvation!
With all that being said, I still masturbate and I think I still lust. But how often I lust and how often I masturbate has gotten less as I've gotten older. I think that is because my sex drive which causes my sexual feelings, has slowly gotten less.
You can read about that here:
https://christianchat.com/christian-singles-forum/answer-to-prayer-or-a-health-problem.206007/
I hate the subject of Masturbation because the Bible does not specifically say anything about it. And I hate all the various ideas people have about it. So many are hurtful to me. Part of the reason is because I've done my own research and I don't come to happy conclusions.
Believers who say it's a sin, map it to Matthew 5:28, and then say, there is no way to Masturbate without lusting, either to porn, or to someone in your head, or to some imaginary somebody... Can you really lust after an imaginary girl?
According to what I've read on medical sites, they claim that men who masturbate are less likely to get prostate cancer.
My Dad had a Collage professor, A Bible Believer, who taught at a Conservative Christian Collage, actually say Masturbation is a God's gift to singles. Boy that doesn't go along with the current Christian trends that believes it's a sin.
I think Men and Women are different when it comes to Masturbation. I think Men do it because they want sexual release. I have no idea why Women do it.
I realize that nearly everyone will push against me on this point, but I currently feel that Lust is inescapable. The reason why I feel this way is because Lust and Sexual feelings seem to be intertwined together. Almost to the point, to where you can't have one without the other.
Believe it or not, I started Masturbating at the young age of 6. I remember thinking about somethings while doing it. And sometimes those thoughts had people in them. But it wasn't sexual. It wasn't until I was around 12 or 13, and a parent explained sex to me. Also we started having sex education at school too, that I my Masturbation thoughts turned sexual.
Porn was a confusing subject for me. The reason why, is because I didn't have access to Porn magazines. But I did have access to Avon, JcPenny, Sears, Lands End, and even Victoria Secret catalogs, that my Mom would just leave out on the coffee table! These were a huge temptation for a very horny teenage boy.
I felt conflicted because I was told that homosexuality was a sin, and I was happy that I was, at least, a straight guy! I was also told that Porn is bad, and yet these catalogs were a common household item. I remember wondering to myself, "Am I looking at porn?, it can't be porn because it's sitting out on our coffee table, and we don't allow porn in our house. We didn't even have cable TV because of all the bad shows."
I always struggled with reading, and I didn't have access to an audio bible. But I tried to read the book of John, and I even read Matthew. But that was just about all the Bible reading I got done back then. I remember coming across Matthew 5:28 and wondering to myself, "What on earth?" You mean just looking at women is a sin? It was so embarrassing that I couldn't figure out how to talk to my parents about this! Even now it's hard! That was one of the reasons why I bought the book "Every Man's Battle" I thought it might make a good conversation starter between me and my dad. I got the audio copy and listened to it, and one day I started telling him about the book. I even showed him the printed book, He took one look at it, and said "This is not going to help you". He is right, that thing brought me more conflict then anything else. I can't see how anyone lives up to the standards that Every Man's Battle puts on men. Because according to them, even a wet dream is lust. Last I knew you can't help your dreams!
Anyways that was not the only time i tried talking to my Dad about that. There was a time before that. I remember saying something about Matthew 5:28 and He said, "that is a tough one." And that was about as far as it goes... My dad did share with me that He has a little different view on lust then other people do. He said, that to him, lust is when you say in your heart that you would do anything to have sex with that person. Even though I have great respect for my Dad, I don't completely agree with that view. Because I can watch anything sensual, and feel a sexual high, but I wouldn't do anything to get with those women. Most of those sexy ladies I wouldn't even want to be around. Because I want to be around women who I click with. It is the woman that I get along with the best, would be the one I want to have sex with. Duh! Anyways that is why I have issues with his definition. It would have been nice of the Bible to have defined what it meant by the word Lust". Cause there is a lot of confusion with it.
*By the way, I tried to confess my problem to my youth pastor, and the senior pastor. I even went forward at Church got anointed with oil, and the congregation laid hands on me and prayed. But the congregation didn't know about the problems they were praying for me about.
I have often wondered how can a man date a girl without lusting after her? The other day I wanted to make my point, so I remembered something from a book by Mark Cahill. And so I quoted it.
Look! I think Mark is probably a good guy with good intentions. But when I posted the quote, He got criticized for this conversation. I don't understand why. It's a short quote, so that i could make my point. If you want to judge the author Mark, then get the book and read it! Or watch some of his videos on youtube. But don't judge people over just a little quote here and there. Ok?
Mark Cahill's witnessing methods is very similar to Ray Comfort's methods. He runs an unbeliever though the ten commandments to show them that they are not good enough to get into heaven. That is then supposed to lead them to the cross.
When Mark gets to the commandment "Don't commit adultery" He brings up Matthew 5:28. Which says "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." To tell the person He has a lust problem in his heart.
The Book "One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven" on page 123 and 124, He's talking to a guy. I want you to read how this conversation goes:
This Chapter is Called: "Guilty"
There maybe some typos, because I had to type a copy from the book.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I like to witness in the bar sections of towns, especially in the summer. These areas are usually bustling with people hanging outside or walking from bar to bar, and many of them are eager to engage in a conversation. On Saturday night in Buckhead, the bar area of Atlanta, I used my survey approach to begin a conversation with a couple in their early twenties.
After the young woman gave me an answer, the guy said, "There is a Heaven and a Hell. And when I die I am going to Heaven because I keep the Ten Commandments. " It didn't take long to get right to the point! "Okay," I began, "let's see how you are doing. Have you ever told a lie?"
He said, "Nope."
I was thinking, We have all told a lie. You just lied to me in your answer! So I responded, "What do you mean 'nope'?"
"I have only stretched the truth before."
He thought he had me, but I asked, "How far do you have to stretch the truth before it becomes a lie?" He smiled and admitted, "Okay, I
have lied before."
"What does that make you?" I asked.
"A liar."
"Have you ever stolen something?"
"Yes."
"What does that make you?"
"A thief."
I continued, "Have you ever lusted in your heart for a girl before?"
His answer was, "No."
His girlfriend quickly pointed a finger at him and said, "You've lusted for me before!" He's in trouble now! When she said that, he responded with a curse word -- it was the Lord's name in vain.
I said, "Wait a minute. There is another one you have broken! You are 0 for 4 and we have only gone through four of the Commandments! Would you be guilty or not guilty on Judgment Day? He said "guilty" and you know where we went from there. Using the Ten Commandments really is incredibly effective.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I haven't listened to this book since 2007 or 2008. But I can't remember Mark ever clarifying this point any farther... I know if He did, I would remember! Because this is a very touchy subject with me!
If my calculations are correct, a Man can not date a girl without lusting being in the mix.
If my calculation is correct, if that Man were to die before they got married, He would go to Hell.
Here is why I think that. Matthew 5:28 + 1 Corinthians 6:9-20.
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+5:28&version=NIV
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Corinthians+6:9-20&version=NIV
There is a verse that might put a catch in my thinking.
Ephesians 4:29-31
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians 4:29-31&version=NIV
If "sealed for the day of redemption" If that is like a promise ring kind of seal, then any of us can choose to take it off, and therefor forfeit our salvation!
With all that being said, I still masturbate and I think I still lust. But how often I lust and how often I masturbate has gotten less as I've gotten older. I think that is because my sex drive which causes my sexual feelings, has slowly gotten less.
You can read about that here:
https://christianchat.com/christian-singles-forum/answer-to-prayer-or-a-health-problem.206007/
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