Christian matchmaking services

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R

Ruby123

Guest
Yes and I hope it can give hope to the singles who would rather be couples. I mean the other day just going through all the pages of chat and there were so many Christians who are single and looking for love, seems like an opportunity here to make a thread or forum where if you are single and available to date-put your country and how you want to be contacted (public or private message or the chat app) and then say what you are looking for..ie female in Toronto age 24 looking for man aged between 25-35 in North America, happy to be pmd. Or is that too much? So it wouldnt be a thread to chat or for others to critique, it would be for serious daters only.
I think there has been threads similar to what you mentioned in the past. There were a couple last year where people would write in about themselves and also one about shipping people together. You may have already seen them if you went through the single threads. I am not sure how to search for it quickly, maybe someone else can instruct.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
1,383
640
113
No, no success TNP. I tried SALT and most of the other so-called Christian dating sites, and none of them fulfil their moral obligations to adequately protect their legitimate clients from being scammed, or approached by those who turn out to be less than morally sound and yet claim to be Christian. There is inadequate or incapable oversight and supervision, which might be because they can't afford to hire it???

This is not a new scenario for me personally, it's one I've encountered over the nearly 40 years I've been a Christian, and have been looking for a buddy for life (wife) all the while because I felt we could help prepare a younger generation for the warfare of marriage (😀), given our personal experiences and training by the university of hard knocks and the Holy Spirit's counsel.

It seems these so-called Christian sites are more concerned about financial gain over and above a proper quality of service. They'll be called to account one day by God for them doing that, and that will be a painful outcome for them to say the least. Count me out of that one-sided fight!

This whole situation can be remedied, but in my opinion it would take a major upheaval of Christianity and no doubt pain, to cause that to happen. However, maybe there's a less painful way to find a suitable Christian for a mate, but there will still be a cost to pay such as forgetting about pride and being prepared to take a calculated risk, to find a solution. This was my motivation for starting the thread. I'm still open to getting something going but it's not much use if there isn't a positive base to draw interest and help from.

It is understandable though, that people are guarded against giving out private information to a source they don't know, and to have their character scrutinised and integrity questioned. We can use government instrumentalities to do the work of proof of identity and somewhat of person's lawfulness. Getting proof of Christianity is another matter, and suitability for marriage is yet another matter too... and that of course begs the question, 'what then is Christianity, and how do you know whether someone is a true disciple or not'?. What a mess, it is so hard not to be disconsolate and angry about how the church has been undermined! But I'm still prepared to give anything a go, but with considered and careful thought and planning. I don't like planning for failures, as bombastic as that may sound. 🙂
Hey, Tony.

As I mentioned on another thread just yesterday, I posted my profile on two dating websites in just the last three days (it was two days when I made that post yesterday). One of them is a "Christian" website (ChristianMingle), but I've already spotted quite a few scammers there.

I spent some time on another "Christian" dating website a while back, and, in my own somewhat educated guess-timation which is based upon my own experiences there, I'd say that most of the people that I interacted with there were fake accounts or "catfish". In general, whether on "Christian" dating websites or not, I'd approximate that somewhere around 90% of the people that I've interacted with were "catfish". That may sound unbelievable, but that truly has been my own experience. Pretty much the only time that I ever interacted with anyone real was on one website (I don't recall which one) where you had the option to take a short video of your face from different angles which you then sent to the administrators there in order to ensure that you were actually the person pictured on your profile. If you took and sent in the video, then your account was marked as "verified". If you didn't, then your account was marked as "unverified". That simple process helped to weed out a lot of scammers.

Anyhow, even though I just put up my profile within the last few days, I've already grown weary of the whole thing. Oh, I'm getting "winks", "smiles", and "likes" galore, and some messages as well, but I heavily suspect, and for good reasons, that they're mostly not from the women pictured on the profile pages there, but more than likely from scammers instead. When you've been at this type of thing long enough, then you begin to notice patterns with scammers, and, sad to say, those patterns abound.

Well, it's time to just start trusting God again if I'm ever to have another relationship with a real woman again.

If not, then his grace is sufficient.

It is what it is.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,418
9,403
113
I think there has been threads similar to what you mentioned in the past. There were a couple last year where people would write in about themselves and also one about shipping people together. You may have already seen them if you went through the single threads. I am not sure how to search for it quickly, maybe someone else can instruct.
Google search works much better than the in-house search function. Just Google "christianchat.com shipping" or some such.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
why not just have a christian doubles forum, because its a bit silly to have a christian singles forum for people who dont really want to be single

even though it goes against Pauls advice NOT to seek a wife and to be happy as you are
as there is no forum for people wanting to leave their marriages either.

tHouhg there is a somehwhat private womens refuge forum for ladies who dont want to be hassled by men.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
The truth (even though it hurts) is a lot of women just dont want to be married. Its not something women actually aspire to these days.

I dont blame them because there are lots of other things you can do in life other than be married, and women dont want to settle for less. We are pilgrims passing through. The reality is marriage is a very expensive undertaking and most cannot afford it.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
lets look at the costs involved

relocation
house
job changes
children?
perhaps immigration visas?
marriage license

WEDDING - dress, honeymoon, food, venue
change of name
insurance
rates/property taxes
bills
lawyers fees for wills etc.

maintenance.,,clothing, food, transport
home repairs
lawnmowing or body corporate fees
secrurity...do you hire amoured guards to protect your investment?!

etc etc.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,418
9,403
113
why not just have a christian doubles forum, because its a bit silly to have a christian singles forum for people who dont really want to be single

even though it goes against Pauls advice NOT to seek a wife and to be happy as you are
as there is no forum for people wanting to leave their marriages either.

tHouhg there is a somehwhat private womens refuge forum for ladies who dont want to be hassled by men.
Would this doubles forum provide a double scotch when you walk in?

Maybe I would have to settle for a double bourbon.
 
C

ChristianTonyB

Guest
Hey, Tony.

As I mentioned on another thread just yesterday, I posted my profile on two dating websites in just the last three days (it was two days when I made that post yesterday). One of them is a "Christian" website (ChristianMingle), but I've already spotted quite a few scammers there.

I spent some time on another "Christian" dating website a while back, and, in my own somewhat educated guess-timation which is based upon my own experiences there, I'd say that most of the people that I interacted with there were fake accounts or "catfish". In general, whether on "Christian" dating websites or not, I'd approximate that somewhere around 90% of the people that I've interacted with were "catfish". That may sound unbelievable, but that truly has been my own experience. Pretty much the only time that I ever interacted with anyone real was on one website (I don't recall which one) where you had the option to take a short video of your face from different angles which you then sent to the administrators there in order to ensure that you were actually the person pictured on your profile. If you took and sent in the video, then your account was marked as "verified". If you didn't, then your account was marked as "unverified". That simple process helped to weed out a lot of scammers.

Anyhow, even though I just put up my profile within the last few days, I've already grown weary of the whole thing. Oh, I'm getting "winks", "smiles", and "likes" galore, and some messages as well, but I heavily suspect, and for good reasons, that they're mostly not from the women pictured on the profile pages there, but more than likely from scammers instead. When you've been at this type of thing long enough, then you begin to notice patterns with scammers, and, sad to say, those patterns abound.

Well, it's time to just start trusting God again if I'm ever to have another relationship with a real woman again.

If not, then his grace is sufficient.

It is what it is.
Yes, I hear you. But I also can't help feeling that God wants us to do something to help Him help ourselves. I'm not saying this is your case at all, but I think sometimes in Christian circles we can fall into a cargo cult like mentality where we expect God to drop solutions out of the sky onto us. In my opinion He is more inclined to tell us (the church) 'I've given you the means and faculties to sort out the problems and fixes yourselves, so get moving on those and I'll be watching on and will provide direct help to you as and when it is needed'.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
1,383
640
113
Yes, I hear you. But I also can't help feeling that God wants us to do something to help Him help ourselves. I'm not saying this is your case at all, but I think sometimes in Christian circles we can fall into a cargo cult like mentality where we expect God to drop solutions out of the sky onto us. In my opinion He is more inclined to tell us (the church) 'I've given you the means and faculties to sort out the problems and fixes yourselves, so get moving on those and I'll be watching on and will provide direct help to you as and when it is needed'.
I have no problem with this.

In fact, it reminds me of Abraham's servant going to look for a wife for Isaac while praying to God for direction at the same time.

In other words, both parties, God and man, were actively doing something.
 
C

ChristianTonyB

Guest
why not just have a christian doubles forum, because its a bit silly to have a christian singles forum for people who dont really want to be single

even though it goes against Pauls advice NOT to seek a wife and to be happy as you are
as there is no forum for people wanting to leave their marriages either.

tHouhg there is a somehwhat private womens refuge forum for ladies who dont want to be hassled by men.
There for a while I thought you might be talking up a tennis match, and given up the idea of dancing as being useful....

Paul was indicating it's fine, even preferable, for people to remain single and dedicate their lives solely in service to the Lord, particularly given the stresses of that time, which is what he did. He also said it's a good thing for people to be married, and indeed presented a couple of scenarios where it's better for people to marry then remain single.

If women or men are being harassed by unwanted suitors then there are avenues open to them for protection. I don't think there is mass harassment going on, or at least such that has been openly reported on!
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,298
4,345
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
Hi Everyone,

I’m wondering if you know of any Christian matchmaking services that, in order to do their best to filter out the ineligible from the outset and determine if a person’s interest in the service is genuine, requires participants to provide:
  • A Statement of Faith (state when and how we were spiritually born again/converted to Christianity, including a paragraph that defines what we believe is a proper Christian lifestyle);
  • Proof of Identity (eg a Photo ID such as a current Drivers Licence, that displays our Date of Birth and PostCode for where we live);
  • A Police Check/Clearance Report acquired within the last 6 months;
  • A properly completed personality profile with a current photo plus other modest pictures, scripted using clean language, showing a well defined list of personality traits and interests, and a list of the desired characteristics of an ideal partner including any age group preferences;
  • If we’ve had a broken marital or de facto relationship, then we will be required to provide a statement declaring why we believe we are eligible for remarriage.
If you do, or have any thoughts on the matter, please let me know.

Shalom,

Tony
Wow!
They don't even do that for a gt job. 😄
But I can understand after getting burned a time or two why you are looking for that.
You might want to start with DARPA Total Information Awareness.
😉
 

Robertt

Well-known member
May 22, 2019
899
320
63
Bahrain
The fun is never in the chase for me , it is hard work , fir me, but the sucesss when it occurs is well worth the effort
😃😃😃😃
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,235
2,529
113
The truth (even though it hurts) is a lot of women just dont want to be married. Its not something women actually aspire to these days.

I dont blame them because there are lots of other things you can do in life other than be married, and women dont want to settle for less. We are pilgrims passing through. The reality is marriage is a very expensive undertaking and most cannot afford it.
It's not just women....it's also men who don't want to be married.

And with the whole celibacy before marriage rule (and birth control methods when you don't) ...we are running out of Christian households.

Only the heathen are having children.

Also considering the fact that most Christians can't tell others about God and Jesus effectively. They speak in too much church speak gobbledygook and Even other Christians have no clue what they are talking about...much less a heathen.

Now Christians are great at saying what sin is....making everyone feel like dirt when they get around them. Oh I know how wonderful I feel when someone tells me how horrible a person I am. Can't imagine that a person with inadequacy feelings is going to relish more of the same.

If this trend continues, I see us being gone/evaporated in a few short years.
 

Willow

Well-known member
Oct 10, 2021
435
405
63
ohio
Well really think it would not matter . There are scammers everywhere. I have found a few on facebook supposed to be single and found they are married on facebook. So many ways people can and will sadly. I guess if I am to find someone it will be in the real world and with God leading.