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Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
609
397
63
USA
Jesus and Paul were very clear the primary reason for marriage was to have sex.
Paul wrote what you're referring to during the time when young women were widowed because Christians were being killed for sport, in places where the practice and belief in our faith was a crime against the state and all Christians lived under a death penalty if caught, and caught so many were.

At a time death is so close, you have a tendency to limit what marriage is best for. Children? How can you think of children when your main fear is being fed to lions and you hope for a good death when death comes. Companionship? That thought while nice might soon end.

So yeah, Paul's main concern was for Christians to avoid sin while they lived. It was a consequence of that time, death was always potentially imminent.

That's not to say in a time of peace, peace being something we've always known in the west, marriage isn't about so very much more.

You're not looking at Scripture within it's correct context.
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
11,887
8,705
113
Psalm 51
5Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
6Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
7Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.
9Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.
10Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
Paul wrote what you're referring to during the time when young women were widowed because Christians were being killed for sport, in places where the practice and belief in our faith was a crime against the state and all Christians lived under a death penalty if caught, and caught so many were.

At a time death is so close, you have a tendency to limit what marriage is best for. Children? How can you think of children when your main fear is being fed to lions and you hope for a good death when death comes. Companionship? That thought while nice might soon end.

So yeah, Paul's main concern was for Christians to avoid sin while they lived. It was a consequence of that time, death was always potentially imminent.

That's not to say in a time of peace, peace being something we've always known in the west, marriage isn't about so very much more.

You're not looking at Scripture within it's correct context.
The context is fornication not about anyone dying. Paul was talking about not fornicating by getting married.
 

Webers.Home

Well-known member
May 28, 2018
5,891
1,084
113
Oregon
.
Gen 2:18-20 . .Then the Lord God said: It is not good for the man to be
alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.

. . . And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and
every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would
call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name.
And the man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to
every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable
for him.

Several years after high school, I ran across one of the girls from the old
gang. She was divorced by then with four kids. As we chatted and caught
up, it came out that she sometimes wished she was the family dog because
her ex showered more affection on that mutt than her.

Gen 2:24 . . A man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave
to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.

My dad's third wife (call her Rosa) was a Mexican girl from Sinaloa. One day,
just to give her a hard time, Dad asked Rosa who she'd save if the boat that
he, her, and her mother were in was sinking and Rosa could save only one.
Well; in Rosa's culture, mothers are very important so she told Dad; "I'd
save my mother because I have only one but I can always get another
husband.
_
 

Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
609
397
63
USA
The context is fornication not about anyone dying. Paul was talking about not fornicating by getting married.
Yes, one of the reasons to marry is to avoid sinning.

That's why you marry.

Says nothing about fornicating all you like while you decide who to marry.

Anyway, I've said my piece. Beating a dead horse now.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
Yes, one of the reasons to marry is to avoid sinning.

That's why you marry.

Says nothing about fornicating all you like while you decide who to marry.

Anyway, I've said my piece. Beating a dead horse now.
Hugging and kissing is not fornication.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
I think that may be your primary reason.
But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband....1 Corin 7:2 This is the way you deal with fornication.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
If you think being single and not having sex is so holy, and pure try starting a eunuchs fellowship at your church and see how many show up. Why are there no eunuchs fellowships?
 

Lucy-Pevensie

Senior Member
Dec 20, 2017
9,388
5,725
113
Marriage is not that simple. You have to know each others likes and dislikes. It's knowing and accepting each others differences and to be willing to change.
I don't disagree & I don't see how it relates to my statement that marriage doesn't last forever.
 

Lucy-Pevensie

Senior Member
Dec 20, 2017
9,388
5,725
113
If you think being single and not having sex is so holy, and pure try starting a eunuchs fellowship at your church and see how many show up. Why are there no eunuchs fellowships?
How would you know if any were eunuchs? I've never heard of a church that does checks for it ;)
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,655
17,111
113
69
Tennessee
Perhaps it is because of a lack of faith, by many times life feels like a bumpy, scary, and painful rollercoaster to me. I want to just glide along on a glassy sea.

Having said that, I feel mighty blessed and mighty fine at moment. All my needs he is providing, but I still worry about next week. Pray that I keep focusing on His daily provision of manna.
Each day I say the Lord's prayer asking for my daily bread.
 

Webers.Home

Well-known member
May 28, 2018
5,891
1,084
113
Oregon
.
During the search for a wife, a man I respected told me: Before looking for
the right one, become the right one.

Well; that was a wake-up call. It made me realize I knew practically nothing
about living with a woman; which is quite a bit different than dating one.

Right about that same time I ran across one of Dr. James Dobson's books
titled "What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew About Women" which in my
estimation is a must-read for every guy in the market for a permanent girl.

I also attended a seminar for married couples. (I borrowed one of the
women from my single's group to accompany me as my "wife" so I wouldn't
feel like a kook among normal folks.)

Even after marriage, I kept an eye out for information that would help me
live with a woman. I eventually read Dr. Laura's book "10 Stupid Things Men
Do To Mess Up Their Lives" and also Shaunti Feldhahn's book "For Men Only"

Thanks to all that information, today I'm proud to say this kid is a well
trained, well adjusted, husband whose first marriage turned out to be a
keeper instead of a starter.
_
 

Lucy-Pevensie

Senior Member
Dec 20, 2017
9,388
5,725
113
Perhaps it is because of a lack of faith, by many times life feels like a bumpy, scary, and painful rollercoaster to me. I want to just glide along on a glassy sea.

Having said that, I feel mighty blessed and mighty fine at moment. All my needs he is providing, but I still worry about next week. Pray that I keep focusing on His daily provision of manna.
Worrying about the future. I still have to overcome this.
 

Webers.Home

Well-known member
May 28, 2018
5,891
1,084
113
Oregon
.
Before looking for the right one, become the right one.

There are books available to counsel future brides just as there are for
future grooms.

For example:

For Women Only
By Shaunti Feldhahn

The Proper Care And Feeding Of Husbands
By Dr. Laura Schlessinger

10 Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives
By Dr. Laura Schlessinger

What Our Mothers Didn't Tell Us
By Danielle Crittenden
_