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K
kenisyes
Guest
I don't think you are ready to love until you know who you are in Christ.
[For the record, Anna and I were brought together by God, married personally by Jesus, and spent a life ministering. Was almost never perfect or happily ever after, but we both knew it was God, both knew it was right, and it worked. Marry again, yup, if God said it was time.]
[For the record, Anna and I were brought together by God, married personally by Jesus, and spent a life ministering. Was almost never perfect or happily ever after, but we both knew it was God, both knew it was right, and it worked. Marry again, yup, if God said it was time.]
I believe that all of us who are christians here on cc who want to get married have the gift of marriage.And that goes for all christians.So no worries about that, so that said I believe i have the gift of marriage. So its not if but when for us
God may very well will that all of us who have the desire may marry or marry again. However, you must also take into account that 1.God's will can be very different from our own, 2. we live in a fallen world, 3. and humans each have a will of our own.
Just because we are Christians and want to marry does not mean God has a glittering Walt Disney ending for each of us in this life. I am always surprised at how many Christians don't seem to realize this. We look at what happened to many key people in the Bible (Jesus included) and yet we think God has a perfect Prince or Princess out there for us to ride off into the sunset with. God instructed Hosea to marry Gomer (who was unfaithful to him numerous times) and I personally still believe God may command many of us to marry someone we would rather not. We all say we want God's will. But do we really?
I have spoken with many older Christians who wanted to marry or remarry but for some reason, it never happened. I think of a wonderful Christian man I once knew whose wife died tragically when he was 28. He would have loved to remarry, but has spent the rest of his life alone.
I have also heard it said that many of us may never marry because 1. God has someone for us but we are unwilling to marry that person--we want our choice instead of God's, or 2. the person God wants us to marry is unwilling to marry us!
Take a poll of Christians in your church ages 70 and up who are single and wanted to marry or lost a spouse to divorce or death and wanted to remarry. Are they now all married or do they yet hope to marry someone? I'm definitely not saying someone can't marry after age 70 but if you've spent any time listening to older Christians I think you'll come to the same conclusion.
If you remember when Jesus was born and his parents presented him at the temple, they were greeted by a woman named Anna who was now in the later years of her life. If I remember correctly, the Bible says she was widowed as a young woman after 7 years of marriage--whether she wanted to remarry or not, we don't know, but she never did.
To say that it's simply a matter of "when" is, in my humble opinion, wishful thinking.
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zaoman32
Guest
I don't believe I will be alone forever.
When Mark Driscoll was going to school to be a pastor one of his teachers asked him if he had the gift of celibacy, he replied "No, if doesn't sound like a gift, probably not."
Those are my feelings exactly
When Mark Driscoll was going to school to be a pastor one of his teachers asked him if he had the gift of celibacy, he replied "No, if doesn't sound like a gift, probably not."
Those are my feelings exactly
I go through phases! I got out of a bad situation before I began to truly follow the Lord. I didn't want to ever get married, and/or have kids. Then the Lord put a deep desire for this on my heart. It was awful. lol..... Now I think I am getting back to normal desire to be in ministry and serving the lord with a spouse. But, I have to focus on the now, cuz there are some pretty crazy things going on in my life right now. lol I will be right with God first, but I think it would be nice to get married and have a family.
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Chr
Guest
Some people may think they want to get married but deep in there heart they don't.The gift of celibacy is good the gift of marriage is good.If someone ways the pros and cons of marriage and of singleness the choice is theirs to decide if they chose marriage I believe God will provide if singleness God will provide for there singleness.God either prepares us for marriage or singleness.But if we truly desire to get married God with provide us with a spouse.
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Chr
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Chr
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Chr
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MidniteWelder
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FireWire
Guest
I'm very cool with it. I've never wanted to get married. If I ever did it was just a passing thought.
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HSfilledlady
Guest
Am I fine with it? Do divorced Christians really have a choice?
If God didn't sanction marriage he wouldnt have made Eve in the first place. Adam needed a partner. He needed a wife. If you are single and have never been married, the Bible says it is better to marry than burn with lust. Pray that God sends you the best Husband for you or the best wife. He knows you better than you know yourself, so He is truly the best matchmaker.
For those of us who have been married before, we have a totally different challenge. What we want or dont want should not be the issue. What we feel or don't feel should not be the issue either. What does God say about marriage after divorce is what we should be examining here. If you were married in a church by pastor, you took vows before God, it is a covenant with God and your spouse--the three of you. Til death do you part. You made a promise.
In God's Word the only viable reason for divorce is infidelity. The Bible aslo states, If you are married to an unbeliever and they want to go, let them. I am unsure if this even constitues an actual divorce in God's eyes or not, or if it is just considered fornication (or adultry) when you marry an unbeliever; I am not sure how an unbeliever can even make a covenant with God. T
he idea that you would marry an unbeliever AFTER you had been saved without regard for what God says about this, to me is odd, but maybe it does happen. I would question whether the person who did this was actually ever really a true Christian. At the very least it is definitely a really, really BAD idea. It states this in the Bible too. It warns us not be unequally yoked in marriage or even in friendship with unbelievers.
I would prefer to marry again, but I am accountable as a Christian to what God says about that. I have been wondering myself lately whether we even are allowed another chance according to God's Word based on these 3 scriptures:
Matthew 19:9 KJV
And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Mark 10:11-12 KJVAnd he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.
And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.
Luke 16:18 KJV
Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.
These verses dont just say if YOU have commited adultery You are not able to marry again. It says even if your spouse commited adultery and divorced YOU, if You get married again You are committing adultery adn so is the person who married you.
Which means, as far as I can figure --- we get one shot at marriage according to the scriptures unless our Spouse dies, we can get divorced if they commit adultery but we are not to marry again period.
If anyone else has a biblical basis for another belief, believe me, I would love to hear it too. But, I simply cannot reconcile what I feel like doing with what Word of God says.
If God didn't sanction marriage he wouldnt have made Eve in the first place. Adam needed a partner. He needed a wife. If you are single and have never been married, the Bible says it is better to marry than burn with lust. Pray that God sends you the best Husband for you or the best wife. He knows you better than you know yourself, so He is truly the best matchmaker.
For those of us who have been married before, we have a totally different challenge. What we want or dont want should not be the issue. What we feel or don't feel should not be the issue either. What does God say about marriage after divorce is what we should be examining here. If you were married in a church by pastor, you took vows before God, it is a covenant with God and your spouse--the three of you. Til death do you part. You made a promise.
In God's Word the only viable reason for divorce is infidelity. The Bible aslo states, If you are married to an unbeliever and they want to go, let them. I am unsure if this even constitues an actual divorce in God's eyes or not, or if it is just considered fornication (or adultry) when you marry an unbeliever; I am not sure how an unbeliever can even make a covenant with God. T
he idea that you would marry an unbeliever AFTER you had been saved without regard for what God says about this, to me is odd, but maybe it does happen. I would question whether the person who did this was actually ever really a true Christian. At the very least it is definitely a really, really BAD idea. It states this in the Bible too. It warns us not be unequally yoked in marriage or even in friendship with unbelievers.
I would prefer to marry again, but I am accountable as a Christian to what God says about that. I have been wondering myself lately whether we even are allowed another chance according to God's Word based on these 3 scriptures:
Matthew 19:9 KJV
And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Mark 10:11-12 KJVAnd he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.
And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.
Luke 16:18 KJV
Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.
These verses dont just say if YOU have commited adultery You are not able to marry again. It says even if your spouse commited adultery and divorced YOU, if You get married again You are committing adultery adn so is the person who married you.
Which means, as far as I can figure --- we get one shot at marriage according to the scriptures unless our Spouse dies, we can get divorced if they commit adultery but we are not to marry again period.
If anyone else has a biblical basis for another belief, believe me, I would love to hear it too. But, I simply cannot reconcile what I feel like doing with what Word of God says.
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iTOREtheSKY
Guest
IMO I think built into each man & woman designed by God is the desire to have a partner or to not have a partner. (plz don't freak out with scripture on me about this ppl,like I stated,my opinion) I do 100% believe that some ppl should be married & others have no business. There have been many times in my life that I had a strong desire I felt placed by God on me to be doing or involved with,only to later realize he wanted me doing something else. Was that desire wrong to have? No,I don't think so. I am human though & don't always hear God clearly...even with church,christian friends,spending 24/7 reading the bible. Someone may have a strong desire to get married,wether it be because they burn with lust,desire a family & children,need a good tax write off,lol...what ever the case may be & they may end up fulfilling that desire & finding a partner,but just maybe...maybe that wasn't the "perfect" road God had designed for them to travel. God can redeem all things & he can turn a mistake into something awesome for sure. It seems at times many christians I have spoken to over the years have made marriage an idol in their lives & used the burning with lust thing as to why they need to be married. Plz plz plz,do not get offended by what I am saying,I am in no way judging anyone. I merely started this thread because I was interested in the ideas & feelings of those on this forum,as I am newly divorced & haven't talked about this issue with anyone in ages.
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iTOREtheSKY
Guest
This thread wasn't really designed with the point of questioning if christians who were married & now divorced should,can,or can't get re-married according to the word of God. I'd rather stick to the topic at hand,which is do you feel you can in your heart follow God's will if even though you have a desire to "be" with someone,can you be cool with that & lay that desire down at his feet & move on with your life? This question was not designed for ppl who were married at one time only,because that's an entirely different can of worms that ppl like to discuss. I think I have made my opinion clear for my life how I feel about that in another thread where that was the topic.
With all that said...I think I see where yer' coming from HS. I am sorry I used the word "feel" even once in this thread,I forget sometimes how I type & how my meanings are lost many times...I also forget that so many ppl out there in the christian community get very technical when you use certain words & assumptions are made that he or she is a baby christian and/or they do not understand that you walk with Jesus isn't based on how you feel...it's based on his word,etc...lol My apologies to any I may have offended by starting this thread.
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Samohito
Guest
as human being, sometimes I was jealous to see the married couple with their happy family. but when i see the married couple unhappy, got divorced or got trouble in their marriage life, i will say I'm lucky not married yet, so i don't experience it.
well, i don't think God will let me alone, while He knows I need a partner life. But maybe I have to wait until the right time come.
well, i don't think God will let me alone, while He knows I need a partner life. But maybe I have to wait until the right time come.
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Donkeyfish07
Guest
I know what you mean there. Every single friend I have that got married is either divorced or on their second marriage. I haven't seen many happily married couples so I'm in nooooo rush.
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Samohito
Guest
Yes agreed , we should no rush..! we have to ask God to ensure that she/he is the right one for us.