men bashing

[MissCris]

You're right Ugly. It's not really something that I understand. You shouldn't bash your husband, you should lift him up. You shouldn't EVER bash him in public or private. If a woman has a problem with her husband, she should go to him and work it out. If they need to, then counseling is the best idea. Unfortunately, many women think that nagging, badgering, or talking to their friends about how awful their husband is will fix the situation. Something most people don't remember is the whole do-unto-others thing. If I don't want to be nagged and insulted, why would I do so to my husband?

I feel really, really strongly about how women treat men, because...

I used to be that woman. The one who said horrible things about my husband to other people. It started out with just "poking fun" at him behind his back, then complaining to others about the things he was doing, and you know? The more I let hateful words about him come out of my mouth, the more hateful thoughts sprung up.

Pretty soon I was showing all that anger to my husband. We spent a good 4 years this way; me treating him horribly, him responding in anger and worse behavior than what originally had been frustrating me; me yelling at him for it; him defending himself and said behavior; me eventually just up and leaving.

I walked out on my marriage numerous times in the first few years. Yeah, we had some problems- things we could have worked out privately, but I refused to keep my mouth shut. It destroyed all trust and intimacy between us, and my leaving only made it worse. I honestly don't know why he let me come back the first time, let alone any of the others.

After the last time, I learned. I stopped bashing him, I stopped being angry about everything, and our marriage has been healed. Completely. Thank God.

But you know what? I never learned, growing up, how to treat a man, how to talk to one respectfully. I was raised around a lot of very strong, very intelligent women who, while being married, hated men. I had no idea how to even begin to respect my husband. Not that it's an excuse for how I behaved.

I'm kind of a "reformed man-hater". Of the worst kind. Because I never even realized that that's what I was doing.

And I'm not saying that men are never at fault, that all their behavior can be blamed on women's behavior, but ladies? Watch how you treat men, how you speak to them, and how they respond accordingly- not just in a romantic relationship, either, but your guy friends, your fathers, your brothers, your sons.

Anyway...sorry, I'll shush now.

 

[wisebeardman]

yeah... that sounds totally Healthy.
Seriously, bro. be Man enough to cry.
If you've got negative emotions of some kind or another sticking them in the back of your "emotional refrigerator" will just make the fester and turn into something worse. The mold and funk can potentially ruin all the other emotions in your fridge, spoiling everything for you. If something's gone off, don't stick it in the back of the fridge, pull it out, throw it out, and clean the container while its still salvageable. Then put something happy back in its place.
golly, I hope you're in touch with yer feelings enough to get the metaphor... I can only assume that you are not joking, so I hope you're not offended if that was your idea of sarcastic humor.

well personally I do not cry. to me it shows weakness and crying about stuff is for 5 year olds.

I honestly do not care. I could care less if someone calls me every name in the book or calls me a low life or whatever. i have heard it all before. I learned long long ago life sucks and then ya croak so no time to cry about stuff.

 

[leelee]

I'd give anything for a good French baguette right about now. lol

You don't get to eat it! I hit people with it!




Although I guess if you kept your mouth open and got hit in the face you might manage to grab a bite.

 

[leelee]

well personally I do not cry. to me it shows weakness and crying about stuff is for 5 year olds.

I am pretty sure I heard an 8 year old say that crying was for 5 year olds not so long ago. Crying is in no way a sign of weakness, unless you cry pretty much constantly, it is a healthy and natural way to express emotion. Crying reduces stress which is linked to many other health problems including hypertension and heart disease, I would say it is better to have a good cry than allow the stress to build up.

 

[Tintin]

Crying isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. Of course, if you cry about every little thing, that's silly but to cry about things that really matter is to experience life with God and others. It's just a part of being human and sometimes it provides healing relief.

 

[wisebeardman]

Crying isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. Of course, if you cry about every little thing, that's silly but to cry about things that really matter is to experience life with God and others. It's just a part of being human and sometimes it provides healing relief.

I have survived by taking the Vulcun approch.

Seriously I don't cry. that ship sailed long long ago. I don't let things bother me. I quit letting things bother me when i was about 10 or 11. Crying about stuff don't change the outcome. bad stuff happens. I live with it.

 

[iTOREtheSKY]

MissCris.....stop with this stuff "Anyway...sorry, I'll shush now." You have lots to say & offer! Don't make me contact the League Of Judgmental Mammals.

 

[arwen83]

Crying isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. Of course, if you cry about every little thing, that's silly but to cry about things that really matter is to experience life with God and others. It's just a part of being human and sometimes it provides healing relief.

This reminded me of a quote I once heard from a wise man

 

[Ugly]

Men bash so do women no one is perfect lol lets all get over this lol

I see you're not really getting the idea of the post.

 

[Ugly]

Crying isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. Of course, if you cry about every little thing, that's silly but to cry about things that really matter is to experience life with God and others. It's just a part of being human and sometimes it provides healing relief.

I was going through the forums and saw this awesome boy boy type who had a signature ..

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not a mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition and of unspeakable love.”

 

[Perseus]

Attitudes towards men is why I generally don't even bother with Western women. Too many of them are 5's thinking they're 10's deigning to speak down to my level. Who needs it? Just write them off and spend your time on those who can actually see the world clearly.

 

[DuchessAimee]

Attitudes towards men is why I generally don't even bother with Western women. Too many of them are 5's thinking they're 10's deigning to speak down to my level. Who needs it? Just write them off and spend your time on those who can actually see the world clearly.

Speaking of bashing... Why do you hate women? You've made lots of comments over many different threads and none of them are positive towards women. I'm not sure who did what to you, but take Seatbelt's advice to Wise and clean out your emotional refrigerator. Or sit down with Itorethesky and have a good, healing cry with Jesus. Your animosity is eating you alive.

 

[Ugly]

I haven't seen his posts, Aimee, or noticed them maybe. But yeah, have to get over it. I've had some really bad treatment from women, but i still want one. They're so cute and soft and cuddley. And even more likeable when they can cook and clean..

 

[arwen83]

I haven't seen his posts, Aimee, or noticed them maybe. But yeah, have to get over it. I've had some really bad treatment from women, but i still want one. They're so cute and soft and cuddley. And even more likeable when they can cook and clean..

Kittens???

 

[MissCris]

Attitudes towards men is why I generally don't even bother with Western women. Too many of them are 5's thinking they're 10's deigning to speak down to my level. Who needs it? Just write them off and spend your time on those who can actually see the world clearly.

...maybe they have a bad attitude toward you because you're rating them like a product?

Cuz...that would torque my turkey, too. Just sayin'.

 

[Ugly]

Kittens???

You know kittens that cook and clean? 0.0 zoinks! Must have some major gentics research going on over there, eh?

 

[Ugly]

...maybe they have a bad attitude toward you because you're rating them like a product?

Cuz...that would torque my turkey, too. Just sayin'.

Torque my turkey? *tries to fathom the implications...

 

[arwen83]

You know kittens that cook and clean? 0.0 zoinks! Must have some major gentics research going on over there, eh?

Well kitties are pretty good a cleaning- they spend hours and hours on end making sure their fur is looking perdy. The cooking part still need to be worked on.

 

[MissCris]

Torque my turkey? *tries to fathom the implications...

I wish I knew how to respond without sounding even more ridiculous than I already did...

Hmm. Can't do it.

I started saying things "torque my turkey" when I get mad instead of using other, less appropriate language. Because, you know, out of all the words in the English language, those were the only ones that fit.

 

[Donkeyfish07]

Well kitties are pretty good a cleaning- they spend hours and hours on end making sure their fur is looking perdy. The cooking part still need to be worked on.

Mine even insists on grooming my beard when it's long enough