Let the pun wars begin

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Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles...

Now I'm experiencing constant vowel movements...

and the next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster! 😂
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
17,960
4,771
113
I've heard it said of someone very upset that he was pooping bricks over the issue that got him upset. I guess you're pooping tiles over it.

Our dog ate a whole bag of foil wrapped milk chocolate easter eggs. Now he poops sparkles. He seems to be perfectly fine otherwise.
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
Doctor , my cousin says he feels like a pack of cards...

Tell him I'll deal with him later.
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
A guy was leaning over his lawn mower sweating.."like the Dickens"...

He was going through a rough patch!
 

shittim

Senior Member
Dec 16, 2016
7,012
3,913
113
I tried to come up with a carpentry pun that woodwork. I think I nailed it, but nobody saw it. –
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
Did you hear about the guy who's whole left side was cut off?

He's all right now! 🤗
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
A guy was thrown out of the local park after arranging the squirrels by height..

The park rangers didn like him critter sizing! 😂
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
I'm starting to tell everyone the benefits of eating dried grapes...

It's all about raisin awareness. 🤗
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
Garden gnomes are required by the head gnome to wear little red hats!

It's a little gnome fact! 🤗
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
Think about it.. 🤔

If a bear 🐻 put on 🧦 socks...he'd still have bear feet! 😂
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
17,960
4,771
113
The question is, could he still catch you if he was wearing socks? That is THE single only question worth asking about bears. Can they catch you or not?
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
The question is, could he still catch you if he was wearing socks? That is THE single only question worth asking about bears. Can they catch you or not?
Maybe...bear-ly! 🤭
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
A keen observation ruined by a typo. Ah well.

Maybe they call him a broker for the same reason a doctor calls his business a practice.
A keen observation ruined by a typo. Ah well.

Maybe they call him a broker for the same reason a doctor calls his business a practice.
Good one & Keen eye....Thought I checked..whoops! 🤭
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
Why is it so difficult for a. Leopard 🐆 to hide?....because he's always spotted! 😊
 

Jase

Active member
Jun 9, 2021
398
216
43
Why did the cyclop stop teaching? 🤔

Because, he only had one pupil. 🤗


O.K...O.k..that was a 5th grade joke. 😂