Plans for My Physical Limitations - Can you add?

Days seem to move so slow. And still much clearing of congestion in throat when I eat. The food goes down, but it is truly work. When I talk, my mouth is full of too much saliva and I have to keep it from drooling out of the side of my mouth by swallowing a lot. I feel like I'm speaking under water. And my voice is not what it was at all because of my tongue which is not quite moving as it should.


My salivary gland was removed and that probably has to do with these problems. I keep wondering if this is the rest of my life, and come up with plans to compensate.


1. Use my eyes and gestures to communicate more. When I want them to leave, just gently push them towards the door while looking lovingly into their eyes.


2. Teach my friends sign language.


3. Keep them talking. Keep a bunch of questions for them to answer in a bowl and have them draw one out each visit.


4. Make my home a place where people can just hear
themselves talk in order to sort out their thinking. And my presence will just be a silent one. This could work. I will put a sign on the door "Hear your own thoughts".


5. When eating, always read a good book to distract myself from the throat problems and the fact that I must be alone when eating. Instead of sharing meals with friends, I now share meals with a book.


6. Find something productive in a creative sense to do that I can get passionate about and lose myself in. So far it has been movies and more movies. Books and more books. That can get old.


7. Keep giving thanks for what is left intact in my body. Like my hair - my jawbone (it was close to being affected) - my hands - eyes - legs, etc. Give them better care (my nails could sure use a manicure). Especially keep my hair trimmed and beautiful ( to impress doctors!)


8. Learn to love having a crooked smile. Consider it a unique thing about me that will totally disarm people. Maybe adding a cute little hand drawn mole at the corner will further enhance this.

I love your attitude on all this. This are all good suggestions, BUT don't turn yourself entirely into a mute person.. Your friends will have to learn how to decipher your garbled language..

9. Come and talk with us here on ChristianChat?

Well it may not be permanent have you tried asking your doctor if it is? Have you considered telepathy? I hear it works quite well for communication But in all seriousness as far as speaking goes you could always have a tablet or a white board and write down what you want to say to people and how it to them.

Since all the nerves and muscles were removed on one side of my neck, this is probably permanent unless a miracle happens. Unlike a stroke, where muscles can recover, there are no muscles.

I was keeping my plan on the playful side so that I always keep my sense of humor.

You know there also those things where you type what you want to say and the machine does an automated voice that says for you, though to be honest they sound so robotic that i sometimes can't stand it lol

I have problems with too much phlem. I try to swallow it but yeah it just chokes me. Realizing it would be the lesser embarrassment, I got my self a nice little spittoon. It helps immensely. And people understand.

There's no reason you can't be a listening post, the world is crying out in droves for them. There is cleansing in confession, in getting things out and God will bless you for making yourself available to people for that.

I just wonder if, as you listen, Red Bird might show up for them with a word

Love and prayers

Sister, you are in a place some of us have been and find ourselves in every rung of the ladder praying and trusting God to get us back to that top step physically. Whenever I plan for my limitations so I can be prepared, which is wise, I also feel as if in a way, I'm settling for where I am now and that part of me is giving up on faith in Christ's healing. I have to remind myself that this is not so! I remind myself to look how far He has brought me up the ladder already!
Before I had my injuries, I worked as a private contractor in home health for people with disabilities...one of my last clients was hard to understand when I first started working with her...but it didn't take long before I could understand her and interpret for her when others couldn't grasp some things she said. I don't know what your diagnosis and prognosis is, but if your Doc hasn't ordered a speech therapist...tell him to. Insist on it! The sooner the better! This therapy can help with swallowing, the salivating issue and speech!
God bless and don't give up!
Also...painting is a great way to express yourself and like our other sister said...stick around and chat here!

Hi Lighthearted. Yes, I have had speech therapists work with me on the swallowing, etc. The salivating problem is because they removed the gland that balances it. The therapists did help me to be able to swallow food and I am trying out soft veggies and foods like scrambled eggs now with success. Yet, that old mucus pops up.

I had cancer of the mouth and neck and had one side of both hard and soft palates in my mouth removed. As for the neck, the cancer spread to all the muscles and nerves clear down to my shoulder and they were removed. I am completely without feeling on one side of neck and shoulder.

Just keep climbing sis...sounds like He's brought you quite a few rungs already! Your positive spirit is an inspiration! Thank you for sharing I will be praying for continued healing in Jesus' name for you. Amen.

Play soft music when people are over . I think silences are less strained if there is music playing. Also, are you able to crochet or knit? I know when I was sick for a long while learning to crochet really, really helped me pass the time. Then I looked up all kinds of cute patterns and made things for people.

Yes - I knit. Working on a sweater, but for awhile I haven't felt the energy to even knit. Time to soon pick it up again I think.
Good idea about music. The opposite of what I usually like. Music has always been something I either really listen to and has my full attention, or I would rather not have any sound interrupting the silence I have always loved.

My dad had cancer in his throat near his vocal cords. Surgery removed the nodes and then he received radiation treatments. Wrecked his saliva glands and made his mouth dry all the time.

The things we take for granted are the ones that often drive us crazy when they are taken away.

My dad is gone now but you are prompting me to pay more attention to my dentists advice to have an oral surgeon look at the dark spots on my lower jaw. I do tend to procrastinate.

Thanks.

For the cause of Christ
Roger

Lol that's me too. "background music" can be a bit irritating to me. But, I've found it does make people more comfortable. Depending on how simple or not the pattern is, try knitting during one of those many movies . It seems to take less energy and will-power thataway, at least for me.

I love your outlook, sister. I'll be praying for you!

Hi Joi, we have a wonderful lady in our church who sang in the choir. She is Chinese and
spoke 3 languages.

Then a few years ago she was In a terrible car accident, her daughter was killed
and the lady ended up in a coma and paralysed from waist down. She also had a
severe head injury.

It took almost a year to recover she is still in wheel chairs, all her mental abilities
are intact but the speech centre of her brain has been damaged. She cannot talk any
more and only can make strange noises. She’s gone from having a lovely voice and
being bilingual, to no voice at all.

She still comes to church and joins in the worship, she waves a flag or waves her arms.
She uses a note pad and pen to talk to people.

She still prays out loud, we can’t tell what she is saying but God can.

People who didn’t know her before the accident treat her as if she is mentally
backward or handicapped. The rest of us know her brain is still as active and
astute as before the accident.

Its more a case of educating the people around you.

If they can’t cope with how things are - then tough that’s their problem.
Tell them like it is in whatever way you feel is appropriate, get others who
know you alongside as well.

Why not invite friends over and lead a bible study. Lol I’m sure you can
tell them a thing or two. Tell them it’s a written contemplative bible study.

Get them to write down prayer requests and say you will pray for them.
Turn it on it’s head so you end up taking care of their spiritual needs.

I think a lot of it is that people generally tend to treat anyone who is different
or who has your issues, as if they need babying and are not all quite there!

Unfortunately it will be down to you to prove otherwise and re-educate them.

I have a friend who had cancer and has ended up in a wheelchair, he is 71.
He said that on going back to his church, all the women at church kept going up
to him, patting him, hugging him, even kissing him. He said he felt like some sort
of Huw Heffener figure, you know that chap who had all those women and models
hanging off his arm!

Illness and disability does strange things to people around the person!

I know, draw up Joi’s 10 commendments and stick it somewhere prominent.
Tell people you found them on a mountain.

Or you know how you can down load funny speaking ring tones and sounds or
songs.

Try downloading some and play them at approriate time. Like Bugs Bunny
”That’s all folks”!

Or Forest Gump “That’s all I have to say about that”.

Andy Pandy you might not know this one “Time to go home, time to go home”.



I think they will get the message.

I'm not sure you can do this, but try a CPAP mask at night. It dries out my mouth so much, it takes a good 1-5 minutes in the morning to get any saliva going. (Worse that happens for you, is you don't get your pillow wet with drool.)

I have a neighbor with the same level of garden-passion I have. The only problem was she speaks no American, and I speak no Italian. It really wasn't that much of a problem. Gestures, (along with what was probably perceived on both sides as a bunch of babbling, but with inflections in it. This can be achieved without opening the mouth. Think Tim Allen's grunting in the show Home Improvements.) In a five minute "conversation" with her, I got pretty-blue little flowers, she got a bunch of pumpkin blossoms for dinner, AND she thought I was nuts for not wanting to use them myself. (I know you can stuff and fry them. It's the frying I can't take. lol)

80% of communications is done by body language and inflections. You can still get the inflection without ever opening your mouth. You're going to have to turn up the volume on body language. Think Italian or Jewish. Folks who are unable to talk without using their arms.

I am capable of talking without ever opening my mouth. (Every time a wisdom tooth came in, my jaw locked up. All four came in and none came in at the same time. So also able to eat without moving my jaw much too. lol) I can say, What, I don't know, me-want, hungry, didn't-get-it, and so much more.

Now tell me you can't understand what Tim Allen is saying, even if he isn't using a singe word. I bet you can do the same thing in a more ladylike way. And it can be more of a hmm, than a grunt.

[video=youtube;YQwYNca4iog]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQwYNca4iog[/video]

With the grace of God you have a way of taking a bad situation and turn it into something possible. I admire your perseverance and determination very much. You are an amazing woman and your life is a great testament to the power and love of God. Simply awesome.

Why not invite friends over and lead a bible study. Lol I’m sure you can
tell them a thing or two. Tell them it’s a written contemplative bible study.

Now this might be a good idea since I used to lead two bible studies a week. Just a few ladies a week might work.
A Contemplative Bible Study. Most of the time could be spent with them reading and writing thoughts they get - even questions that anyone could answer. That would limit my talking.

Thanks Miri - will really pray about this one.