-
Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.
If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!
To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
hi sweetgirl,
just wanted to be sure you knew, that this is the Forum part of christianchat... it often takes hours or days for people to respond...
the instant LiveChat part is over on the main page here
Christian Chat Rooms & Forums @ Christian Chat .com!
click "Chat Now"
just wanted to be sure you knew, that this is the Forum part of christianchat... it often takes hours or days for people to respond...
the instant LiveChat part is over on the main page here
Christian Chat Rooms & Forums @ Christian Chat .com!
click "Chat Now"
D
Actually, no. Tell your mom. There are women's shelters you both can go to in the time it takes her to press charges, he gets sent to jail, and then post bail.
If your mom does nothing, it may really be time to use your knee into his groin. And then you have a clear choice. If you report it to the cops, they'll put you in temporary foster care until they determine if your mom is a fit parent. Assuming she just flinched at the wrong time, (she didn't report him), then she needs to go to a safer place to live. (Again, women's shelter works.) By then the state will do whatever they have to do to get you and her into a safer place to live.
AND, if she really is the type to take his side rather than your side, then foster care isn't temporary.
Any man who is "inappropriate" with a teen girl isn't going to stop there unless he is made to stop there. Even the knee-in-groin is only a temporary protective measure. He will do you more harm if you do nothing. (I am serious about using it if you have to though. And then RUN! Run to wherever he can't get you and don't go back until he's gone.)
And how do I know this? I worked for a Runaway/Throwaway shelter for kids and most of them started this same way. Then I was a group home parent for up to six teen boys in the foster system. I'll tell you the truth. The foster system in the US truly stinks. Vultures couldn't stand the smell, they are so bad. However, living with being raped by Mom's boyfriend/stepdad is far worse! You can get out of foster care eventually. You can't ever get out of being raped.
But that is the worse-case scenario. If your mom is fairly sane and she loves you, she WILL find a way to keep you safe in a New York Minute! Don't let living-situation fall on your shoulders. Protect yourself. In the long run you'll probably also be protecting your mom and other girls your age. I doubt this is the first time he ever tried this.
If your mom does nothing, it may really be time to use your knee into his groin. And then you have a clear choice. If you report it to the cops, they'll put you in temporary foster care until they determine if your mom is a fit parent. Assuming she just flinched at the wrong time, (she didn't report him), then she needs to go to a safer place to live. (Again, women's shelter works.) By then the state will do whatever they have to do to get you and her into a safer place to live.
AND, if she really is the type to take his side rather than your side, then foster care isn't temporary.
Any man who is "inappropriate" with a teen girl isn't going to stop there unless he is made to stop there. Even the knee-in-groin is only a temporary protective measure. He will do you more harm if you do nothing. (I am serious about using it if you have to though. And then RUN! Run to wherever he can't get you and don't go back until he's gone.)
And how do I know this? I worked for a Runaway/Throwaway shelter for kids and most of them started this same way. Then I was a group home parent for up to six teen boys in the foster system. I'll tell you the truth. The foster system in the US truly stinks. Vultures couldn't stand the smell, they are so bad. However, living with being raped by Mom's boyfriend/stepdad is far worse! You can get out of foster care eventually. You can't ever get out of being raped.
But that is the worse-case scenario. If your mom is fairly sane and she loves you, she WILL find a way to keep you safe in a New York Minute! Don't let living-situation fall on your shoulders. Protect yourself. In the long run you'll probably also be protecting your mom and other girls your age. I doubt this is the first time he ever tried this.
U
Actually i replied within minutes. But she went inactive immediately after posting this, as i checked a number of times, hoping she would share what was going on. And she didn't return back to the thread for at least 24 hours.
Chat is somewhat hit or miss. I've seen people go in there asking for help or prayer and get completely ignored. And i've seen the room stop everything to help someone. So even that isn't a guaranteed help. Forums may be slow, but are much more reliable.
Chat is somewhat hit or miss. I've seen people go in there asking for help or prayer and get completely ignored. And i've seen the room stop everything to help someone. So even that isn't a guaranteed help. Forums may be slow, but are much more reliable.
U
I've been in and out of the chats since 2011. Most of the time the chats have been shallow and clique-ish. The past year i have seen it be a bit more balanced than in the previous years. There have been more acknowledgements to people needing help, but i'd still say it's unreliable. So i'm looking at 5 years of history, so i will likely have a different perspective than you, because of that, is all. (=
1
Difficult situation - sharing the dilemma is a good start. One needs to get outside the situation to see objectively which is hard to do. Advice has been given regarding reporting to police or agencies that should be considered. In the all too often co-dependent situation, objectivity can be even harder. You may need to heed the advice given even if to get some temporary relief and get that objectivity needed. Still there seems to be other issues that need to be addressed.
This is difficult to share we know. I am glad you can open up a little - it is an important start. Keep us posted, we will keep you in mindfulness. Thanks for sharing ...
This is difficult to share we know. I am glad you can open up a little - it is an important start. Keep us posted, we will keep you in mindfulness. Thanks for sharing ...
T
You are never alone!!!!!!!
It took me forever to realize that... I still lose sight of that realization...a lot actually.
I once had a staff at the camp I work at tell me this;
God doesn't make us walk this life alone. Even Jesus had His disciples. Did he need them?
No, He had God and that is all we will ever need. But did God just abandon giving even Jesus people to walk with Him?
No. And he will not abandon that for you.
There will be times when God takes people out of your life. Some were meant to stay some were meant to go. But He gives us others to help us through this dark awful world. And in that amount of time when it seems like you only have yourself you use that to grow even closer to God, and to let go of every trouble and tear in your eye and place it upon Him. Because truth be told, we are NEVER alone with Him by our side.
When I lived with my mom full time she was married to an alcoholic. He used to get mad over EVERYTHING and hurt us and run around saying our names and saying things I can't repeat about us. Well, when things started going wrong my mother, out of fear, would blame me.
Good heavens did I feel alone then. But I wasn't.
When I was in the hospital the doctors thought I was going to die. I was in so much pain and couldn't walk without falling down. I couldn't breath without a stupid machine helping me and every time I swallowed I would be brought to tears by the pain.
I felt alone. Like no one cared if I even died or how I felt.
When a man raped me I didn't tell anyone. I cried myself to sleep every night and couldn't even go into a bathroom without freaking out. I went to the police and you know what they said
"What have you learned from this young lady?" As if I chose what happened to happen!
You can bet I felt alone.
But I wasn't.
Every single moment of all of those times I felt alone God was looking down on me waiting for my heart to be opened and for me to see that He loved me no matter what I had done. And that I had someone that actually cared about me all along. I just needed to look a little closer.
We are never alone. Just look a little closer. He's waiting for you.
It took me forever to realize that... I still lose sight of that realization...a lot actually.
I once had a staff at the camp I work at tell me this;
God doesn't make us walk this life alone. Even Jesus had His disciples. Did he need them?
No, He had God and that is all we will ever need. But did God just abandon giving even Jesus people to walk with Him?
No. And he will not abandon that for you.
There will be times when God takes people out of your life. Some were meant to stay some were meant to go. But He gives us others to help us through this dark awful world. And in that amount of time when it seems like you only have yourself you use that to grow even closer to God, and to let go of every trouble and tear in your eye and place it upon Him. Because truth be told, we are NEVER alone with Him by our side.
When I lived with my mom full time she was married to an alcoholic. He used to get mad over EVERYTHING and hurt us and run around saying our names and saying things I can't repeat about us. Well, when things started going wrong my mother, out of fear, would blame me.
Good heavens did I feel alone then. But I wasn't.
When I was in the hospital the doctors thought I was going to die. I was in so much pain and couldn't walk without falling down. I couldn't breath without a stupid machine helping me and every time I swallowed I would be brought to tears by the pain.
I felt alone. Like no one cared if I even died or how I felt.
When a man raped me I didn't tell anyone. I cried myself to sleep every night and couldn't even go into a bathroom without freaking out. I went to the police and you know what they said
"What have you learned from this young lady?" As if I chose what happened to happen!
You can bet I felt alone.
But I wasn't.
Every single moment of all of those times I felt alone God was looking down on me waiting for my heart to be opened and for me to see that He loved me no matter what I had done. And that I had someone that actually cared about me all along. I just needed to look a little closer.
We are never alone. Just look a little closer. He's waiting for you.