Question for the Men...... BEWARE, you may not answer.

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maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
9,526
2,608
113
#21
1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?
A. Commitment: A commitment is when any girl is dumb enough to come to my cave.
B. Relationship: A relationship is when she can't find her way back out.


2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

A. Preferences: In a relationship I prefer a girl to be breathing and have a good pulse.
B. But it IS exciting if she also has one giant eyeball in her forehead.


3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?
A. Promise Rings: Lots of girls promise they'll ring... but they never do.
B. Luckily we all know how to stalk people on Facebook.


4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?
A. I am going to assert my dominance and say this question is inappropriate.
B. I don't really have a point B... but I'm writing anyway because I'm such a rebel that I don't even care whether my outline has proper analytical content for the subpoints.
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#22
I think the beauty with getting to know a person intimately is to learn about eachother and what works as a couple. I think it is foolish to ask a question on domination or submission in a forum, because it is too private and some things should be for the marriage only.
Maybe I should better explain what I meant in regards to question 4.

“Are you the dominant or passive type both emotionally and intimately?”

What I meant was that for some people, being “affectionate” is a struggle for them while others don’t have any problems with being the first to grab their hand or hug them. Some of you have already corrected me of what I was actually meant to say, which is “submissive” so thanks for that.

I’ll give an example about myself. In my past relationship, I was very submissive at first when it came to holding hands with him. I didn’t like the feeling of touching skins but he was the type to insist but still gave my space as well. So in that example, he’s the “dominant” one and I’m the wuss lol.

But I do sincerely apologise to anyone who took this to offensive and that was what I truly meant. I’m not so good at writing things but better vocally. But sorry to peeps who found this inappropriate.
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#23
1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?
A. Commitment: A commitment is when any girl is dumb enough to come to my cave.
B. Relationship: A relationship is when she can't find her way back out.


2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

A. Preferences: In a relationship I prefer a girl to be breathing and have a good pulse.
B. But it IS exciting if she also has one giant eyeball in her forehead.


3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?
A. Promise Rings: Lots of girls promise they'll ring... but they never do.
B. Luckily we all know how to stalk people on Facebook.


4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?
A. I am going to assert my dominance and say this question is inappropriate.
B. I don't really have a point B... but I'm writing anyway because I'm such a rebel that I don't even care whether my outline has proper analytical content for the subpoints.
3.A - very good rebuttal. Lol.
3.B - good thing theres a “block” option.

Thanks for sharing Max. I truly hope you find your one-eyed love.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,491
13,797
113
#24
2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?
A. Preferences: In a relationship I prefer a girl to be breathing and have a good pulse.
B. But it IS exciting if she also has one giant eyeball in her forehead.
To the bold part, Bryan Adams wrote a song about that...

One-eyed love affair
Trying to make like we don't care
We were both reaching out for something....

Murray Head wrote something in a slightly different vein...

One-eyed in Bangkok makes the hard man humble...
 
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S

Sweetmorningdew78

Guest
#25
Hmmm...what is a promise ring? Wedding ring is the only ring I know :D



And if I have the ring already I guess I can say things are getting serious between us (no turning back) :D




I am the submissive type :eek: I learned that from my mother...they are happily married for 44 years and counting and I can say my mother is doing it right :)


My opinion about celibacy...unmarried people should remain celibate Wait until it is the right time (after you say "I do" )




By the way I am a woman :D I know this thread is for men :D chorryyy sis :D






Blessings sis ❤
 
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Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#26
Tbh it’s hard to tell whether your joking or not.
Can't a serious answer be funny?

Got to remember, we are among Christians, they rarely hear honest answers.
 
Dec 16, 2012
1,483
114
63
#27
I learned that from my mother...they are happily married for 44 years and counting and I can say my mother is doing it right. My opinion about celibacy...unmarried people should remain celibate Wait until it is the right time (after you say "I do" )

So agree with you. Both my parents raised me to know that jumping from person to person is completely wrong and virginity is to be saved for marriage exclusively. They've been married for over 35 years and by virtue of example alone, I couldn't imagine having been in all these prior serious relationships before I met 'the one'. Getting to know people slowly, instead of jumping into things and asking God for direction every step of the way has led me to the success and happiness I enjoy daily on my journey with Christ.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,418
9,406
113
#28
Can't a serious answer be funny?

Got to remember, we are among Christians, they rarely hear honest answers.
Apparently you have never been to my church or any church like my church. This is sad.
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
7,117
1,747
113
#29
A "serious relationship" is when you stop going on dates as a way to spend a weekend and start going on dates to spend time with somebody that you realized you don't ever want to be without. Commitment is when you are willing to switch from "I might stay with you or I might someday be going with somebody else" and switch to "You are the one for me forever." Commitment is scary because you have to close a lot of options and you never know where those other options may have led. But you have to close all but one in order to commit to one.

Do you mean specific goals for a person I'm looking for or what I want the relationship to be?
I haven't met her yet so I have no idea what kind of person she will be. I want the relationship to be two people getting through this life together instead of one person going it alone. Alone is doable. Together would probably be more fun.


I'm 40 years old and I'm still a virgin. (And if you quote that idiotic movie, so help me I WILL put you on ignore!) :p Sex is not all there is to life. As for promise rings, I have no idea. If it helps a person remember and focus on the reason for waiting, I guess it's a good thing.


Emotionally, neither. Intimately, I have no idea. See my answer to question 3.

I have seen people in a relationship try to establish themselves as dominate or be submissive and let the other be dominant. From what I have observed it never works very well. Even if they do stay together longer than a year, it's always a struggle to maintain. They never can get their relationship to move forward and grow because it takes all their energy just to maintain it where it is.

The relationships I have seen that work well, thrive and last for the long haul are the ones where both are partners and each does what he is good at. It's not a matter of one being the boss and the other obeying. It probably takes a lot more talking between them to make some decisions, but they trust each other, they know their own strengths and each other's strengths, and BOTH are the boss.

This is important enough to need a new paragraph. In the best relationships I have seen BOTH PEOPLE be the boss at different times, depending on who is better at dealing with a given situation. They both know "I am better at this and you are better at that" so as situations come up both of them might take the lead and say "Okay this is what we need to do" and the other will follow because they both know and freely acknowledge "Okay, you are better at this so I will do what you say."

It never seemed to hurt my father's pride to admit that my mother was the one who balanced the checkbook. She was better at it. She also made the budget for our home. He was fine with that because she was better at it and he was happy to let her do it. He was better at hauling firewood. He was also better at running a leather shop, but she did the accounting and they were both fine with it. It's amazing how much bickering dies down when both people in a partnership don't let pride get in the way of deciding who does which tasks best.

Sorry, that was a bit of a long answer. The short answer is I'm probably neither dominant nor passive. Passive? Did you mean submissive? Well I'm not either of them either. I'm cooperative.


You're welcome. :cool:
dang... I just repped you in another thread.... this post deserves one, too.

The red highlighted parts should be taught in "Marriage 101"...

Most excellent post!
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,418
9,406
113
#30
Actually I'm not even married. I've thought about it a lot though, and observed a lot of married people, and what they do that works, and what they do that fails.

It occurred to me that if I can't trust my (hypothetical) wife enough to make decisions on her own, what would I be doing marrying this woman?

It also occurred to me that if I have too much pride to admit she is better at some things than I am... what would SHE be doing marrying ME?
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#31
Hmmm...what is a promise ring? Wedding ring is the only ring I know :D



And if I have the ring already I guess I can say things are getting serious between us (no turning back) :D




I am the submissive type :eek: I learned that from my mother...they are happily married for 44 years and counting and I can say my mother is doing it right :)


My opinion about celibacy...unmarried people should remain celibate Wait until it is the right time (after you say "I do" )




By the way I am a woman :D I know this thread is for men :D chorryyy sis :D






Blessings sis ❤
I’m glad you contributed dear sister. It’s ALWAYS lovely reading your sweet responses. I actually like how you pointed out (maybe not purposely) that marriage rings are the only ones you know - and it should be :) ❤️
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#32
Can't a serious answer be funny?

Got to remember, we are among Christians, they rarely hear honest answers.
Oh for sure but, not sure on when you joke or not - typing words on a screen is always different to real life, real time imo.
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#33

So agree with you. Both my parents raised me to know that jumping from person to person is completely wrong and virginity is to be saved for marriage exclusively. They've been married for over 35 years and by virtue of example alone, I couldn't imagine having been in all these prior serious relationships before I met 'the one'. Getting to know people slowly, instead of jumping into things and asking God for direction every step of the way has led me to the success and happiness I enjoy daily on my journey with Christ.
Very wise parents you have Laura. I agree with enjoying our walks with Christ as well even through struggles and trials, knowing that God is there for us makes it even worth living.
 

BruceWayne

Senior Member
Aug 7, 2013
3,694
357
83
Gotham City
#34
1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?

I don't know. Being exclusive? That's all I've got.

2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

Not really. There's no adventure in that.

3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?

As far as promise rings, that's not something I have interest in.


4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?

Well, I'm not passive, but this question could go in so many directions. Idk how to answer it.
 

EarnestQ

Senior Member
Apr 28, 2016
2,588
310
83
#35
This post is to get this thread on my subscribed threads list.
 

garet82

Senior Member
Jan 20, 2011
679
85
28
#36
As woman im not qualified to give the answer for these questions :D
 

Treadstone

Junior Member
May 21, 2018
39
50
18
#38
1. My idea of commitment is when you are commited to each other.
2. Preferences: whatever I prefer at the moment. Goals: make them up as I go along. Both things are in a state of flux.
3. Promise rings? Sounds cheesy
4. Both I Guess?
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#40
1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?

Any relationship involves commitment but marriage is the highest level of commitment.

2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

I just want to love and feel loved. He can be mad at me or fight with me. The details don't matter as long as the point is clear.

3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?

Don't mean much. Wedding ring is the lord of the rings. :D

4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?

I aim to be assertive in any relationship.