Is It True That You Either "Have It" or You Don't?

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Oncefallen

Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
#21
Jan 15, 2011
6,069
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#21
JustEli said:
I was taught that anything is possible, nothing is beyond my reach.
Not being high minded and proud, but I was born with heaps of talent
in nearly every aspect of life. Which ironically produced a very cumbersome
streak of laziness within me.
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I can relate to this. So much of what I learned early in life came easily to me and as a result I never really learned good study habits or diligence. As a result I can play guitar but never became anywhere near as good as I could have.

When it comes to more artistic things such as writing, drawing, music, etc. I really think that some people are "naturals" but that hard work and good instruction are still part of the equation.
 
Deade

Deade

Called of God
#22
Dec 17, 2017
16,724
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Vinita, Oklahoma, USA
yeshuaofisrael.org
#22
Didymous said:
Talent is something you're born with, but that doesn't mean hard work and perseverance can't get you there, as well.
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That is the answer. I think Einstein said a good work is 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration. I found I could do most anything I worked at long enough. :cool:
 
L

LittleMermaid

Guest
#23
#23
I failed Pre-Cal in high school. I barely graduated! lol I just didn't think I had it. Then I went to community college for a little bit. I liked it but I didn't have direction, so I quit. A few years ago I decided to try again and realized that I liked math and I was doing well in it. But I only did well if I studied. So now I'm studying business math. It's difficult and it requires so much effort but I love the fact that I am doing it and I understand it now. It's like making a discovery and slowly but surely I'll get it.

I think it's a dangerous thing to say "some people have it and others don't," because it can make people feel incompetent. They will stop trying. That's the last thing you want to do. If you like something and want to be good at it, then try try try! Practice as much as you can. I think as long as you make efforts, you will improve. What you need is drive to keep trying. Seoul, if you didn't like painting then it would make sense to stop trying. But let's say for example, you liked singing and maybe you wanted to improve. You have to keep practicing. The motivation to be a good singer one day will keep you going.

Sure, there are some prodigies. There are some people born with natural talents. But those are rare. I believe that most people have to work hard for their craft. What you reap is what you sow.
 
CharliRenee

CharliRenee

Member
Staff member
#24
Nov 4, 2014
6,693
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#24
I don't think this is a talent but i am known as the pied piper in my neighborhood. It really isn't me, lol, but my grandchildren I am with, lol. Often I have gone for walks with one or two and end up with 10 or more kids from the neighborhood. I enjoy kids and they seem to enjoy me.

Seoul, your thoughts and the way you convey them are so creative. Have you always been a writer?
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#25
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,317
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#25
seoulsearch said:
Hey Everyone,

I've decided that 2019 is going to be The Year of the Bucket - the year that I'm going to try to get busy and hopefully start crossing some things off my own lifelong bucket list. And so, I recently took a painting class, only to find out... that I am not a painter. I loved the challenge of mixing the paint colors into the exact shades I wanted, but filling in all the little lines, spaces, and spaces-between-the-lines was driving me crazy.

While the instructor was very encouraging, she was also very honest in that, when it comes to some artistic venues (particularly drawing,) "you either have it, or you don't." I am confident that without a doubt, whatever that "it" is, I don't have have "it."

This got me thinking about how this well-known phrase has been used in other areas of life... and in some places where it just might NOT be true.

For example, how many of you have been told, or tell yourself things such as:

- "I can't understand math/reading/science. Being smart is either something you have or you don't, and I don't have it."

- "I'll never be able make friends or find a significant other. Attracting people/making friends is just something you have, or you don't."

- "I'll never be (insert negative, crushing comment here) good enough, successful enough, pretty enough, or have enough faith. Some people have those things, and I'm just one of the ones who doesn't have them."

While it's true that some God-given talents seem to be inborn, is this true in most other areas of life as well, or not? What things are more a matter of potential that has to be shaped and practiced, rather than a whole heap of, "Well Hey There, I Guess You've Got 'It'" - whatever "it" happens to be?

I'm always disheartened to hear about people who were told that they were "slow" or "stupid" throughout their childhoods when in fact, they actually may have had a learning disorder and just needed extra time or additional/alternative instruction.

* What experiences have you had with either "having it" or not having it in areas of your life? Do you believe that most abilities are a matter of either "having it", or not"

* What things were you told you were bad at, but eventually found out that were actually pretty good at when you tried?

* What things would you like to try but hold back because you don't think you have "it"?

* How much do you think success in certain areas of life relies on having a mysterious inborn talent, or is more a matter of hard work and practice?


I'm interesting in hearing people's perspectives on how much of our talents are "just something a person has," vs. how much someone can take what they do have and run with "it". :)
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Ok Kim.. I don't know where you're taking classes but I have a degree from what was once considered one of the best art schools in the country. First of all, there really shouldn't be any filling-in of lines in a painting. There are no lines in real life. When you paint, you go over the lines that you drew so they disappear and only an edge defined by the meeting of two areas of different color exists.

And second of all, no art instructor should EVER tell their students that they either have it or they don't. That's HOGWASH! Anyone can become a good painter. They just have to keep trying and learn how to see with your eyes and not your head (see light and shadow, not 'things'). One thing we had to do was draw something in front of us without looking at the paper. We had to train our eyes to trace the picture in front of us and not just try to draw what our head says we are seeing.
 
L

LittleMermaid

Guest
#26
#26
When it comes to dieting.... I just don't have it. :ROFL:
 
Z

Zan

Member
#27
Mar 15, 2019
57
73
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#27
When you're learning to walk or ride a bike, you are going to fall on your face a long time until it suddenly works.

How talented and capable you are is a function of nature and nurture.
 
JosephsDreams

JosephsDreams

Senior Member
#28
Dec 31, 2015
4,313
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#28
My 12 year old daughter is a honors student. She hardly studies. If she gets a score or grade less then about 95 she is genuinely disappointed. Her mom was like that. I have to study a lot to get good grades
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#29
Jul 3, 2015
61,072
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#29
Years after one year of college, I was informed that my instructors had voted me least likely to succeed :oops: It is true I was lacking motivation and ambition, and did drop out of the second year of a two year course early on. Yet in my first year of college, I had discovered a passion and pursued it. It became the sole item on the list of things I would like to do professionally for a living, juxtaposed against a very long list of things I would not consider doing professionally for a living. Within half a year of dropping out of college, I secured my first job in the industry I wanted to work in, after repeatedly being turned away because I had no experience in that field. I have worked in the same industry now for the last forty three years, at three different places of employment; my current job has endured for coming up to thirty seven years. The technology involved in performing my profession has changed many times over the years, and digital has just about decimated the industry, but my job was never in danger because I excel at what I do, driven by the same passion that I discovered in college :)

I have always considered that first job a gift from God. I started on my 21st birthday :D
 
H

Hamarr

Guest
#30
#30
I would agree with others that you can overcome a lack of natural talent through hard work. Natural talent alone doesn't necessarily get you very far either. Especially if it is something you want to excel at. I had some natural talent for drawing but it never went anywhere because I was content with just doing a random picture here and there. I never really took it that seriously.

I found I have improved a lot more musically, but didn't have as much of a gift to start. I have heard from a lot of music playing friends over the years that rhythm can't be taught, but didn't find that to be the case. I have a pretty good "feel" to my playing now, but you wouldn't have known that with the way I started out. Same with picking things out by ear.
 
JosephsDreams

JosephsDreams

Senior Member
#31
Dec 31, 2015
4,313
468
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#31
Most of us can become respectful with most things in time, being dedicated and tenacious.
Still, we will never hold a candle to those with a God given talent and gift with certain things.
Google Condoleezza Rice and her realization she was never going to be a world class pianist no matter who taught her and how many hours she practiced.
 
BruceWayne

BruceWayne

Senior Member
#32
Aug 7, 2013
3,695
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83
Gotham City
#32
* What experiences have you had with either "having it" or not having it in areas of your life? Do you believe that most abilities are a matter of either "having it", or not"

I was never the best artist(outside of drawing Disney characters), but I've become quite decent through practice. There are definitely things that come more naturally to some than others, but that doesn't mean a particular skill set is unattainable just because it's not your thing. To try is the only way to know for sure.
 
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