Hello, everyone:
Have any of you ever been in situations where someone tells you they are thinking of you and masturbating to their thoughts about you... and you are completely horrified, feel violated, and am not sure how to react? Did you say anything back to them?
Because I've had some experience talking to inmates in prison and soldiers in Iraq ( I originally wanted to be a psychologist), I have run into this situation more than once and am not sure how to react to it in a "Christian manner."
I think it's a relevant topic for a lot of people though, because you can just as easily encounter this with a co-worker.
The last few times it happened (and the guys who have told me this all claimed to be Christians), I wrote back to the person, "Well... ok... but will you do me a favor? You've told me you believe in God, right? The next time you're having those thoughts about me, will you imagine God standing right next to you? And you believe He knows your thoughts and intentions, right? What is He telling you abut what you're doing? Please get back to me about what He says to you."
One apologized profusely and said he would never do it again; the other told me I had "hurt him" and stopped talking to me altogether.
I want to be understanding because we're all human and we all have errant thoughts, especially when we're lonely, stressed, and going through terrible circumstances.
But I don't want to feel abused or violated either. I am not at peace AT ALL with the idea of someone having sex with me in his mind when I am 1. not interested in him that way and 2. not his wife (I've had one tell me it was justified because he wanted to marry me.)
One of the guys who did this said, "Well, I'm a man, you're a woman, you should be flattered by the attention."
I wrote him, "I'm sorry, but I am not your personal porn object."
To me, someone reacting to me in this way is a major violation of my free will.
What do you think? Am I being too harsh? And how would you react personally?
*Keep in mind this can happen to anyone--guys included, as I've known plenty of guys who have the problem of another guy telling them they are having these thoughts about them--of course, homosexuality is obviously Biblically wrong. But, how do you deal with someone violating you within their own mind and telling you about it?*