Do you think online dating goes against waiting on the Lord?

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Beloved314

Junior Member
Aug 3, 2014
13
17
3
#1
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,666
17,121
113
69
Tennessee
#2
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
Dating is the process of getting to know each other. Nothing at all wrong about that.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,104
3,200
113
#3
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
Seems whether or not it's online is irrelevant. Both online and offline dating are attempting the same result. So I don't get why there's a distinction.

But as one that doesn't believe in soulmates or other such things, I don't believe marriage is predestined for most people, but rather is a choice.
Paul himself discouraged marriage, except among a few. And that belief did not seem to go against "God's timing".
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,614
4,539
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
#4
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
I don't do dating apps or blind dating through mutual friends. However, I'm not opposed to getting acquainted online. It's like talking on a phone. Face to face locally is the easiest way to get to know someone, but not the only way. I know there are those who do online dating as well as speed dating, etc.
It's just not for me. I've never had a need for that. I've heard of a lot of problems reported from decent people. Christian professionals who can't find anyone they'd be interested in possibly marrying eventually through online dating have approached me to set them with marriage quality ladies from my church.
I'm not their dating service either, but have provided opportunities for others to have Christian fellowship. Few churches provide that here.
I've led evangelical christian singles ministries for my state, Pennsylvania, Maryland and have set up group activities to give believers opportunities to connect . They weren't dating meet ups, but simply wholesome group get togethers and Bible studies with varieties of programs in safe environments. All the pertinent information could be asked and shared by individuals at their own discretion. Unbelievers and guys who were there to pick up were turned away. It's been a blessing for a lot of people. We had marriages come from those ministries.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#5
I think its open to scamming (online dating) but maybe if you go on 'christian mingle' or a reputable website through someone you ALREADY know it might not be bad. Otherwise I wouldnt recommend it.

Like job hunting, it often depends on who you know and also, your references
You might easily find a job, but it wont necesarily be the right one for you. Likewise with people. You can easily find people willing to go on dates, but you never met them before and dont know them from a bar of soap, so how do you even have any yardstick of who this person is, you dont know any of their friends or families who can vouch for them either, or where they are at in the or christian walk. Or even if they have a christian walk or just want to jump on the bandwagon and get a free ride. It will be just what they share and choose to tell you.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#6
Before internet people would actually place an ad in the paper under the personals column.
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,242
10,768
113
#7
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
It's not against God's will at all, one just has to use a reputable site and invite the Holy Spirit to guide. I know quite a few couples who met and married someone they met online. My son is one of them that met his true love, on a YT chat site.
I have a habit of online or irl, if a person says 'yes I'm a Christian' I always ask a few questions to see if they're on the same page as me (when I was looking). I have to ask about their opinion of the Rapture and what church they go to and a few other q's to see if they make it to first base, lol.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,749
9,673
113
#8
This is probably a good place to advertise my new website.

I'm starting a new dating service for people my age and over. It's called Shingles Only. :cool:
 

RodB651

Well-known member
Feb 11, 2021
761
483
63
59
#9
This is probably a good place to advertise my new website.

I'm starting a new dating service for people my age and over. It's called Shingles Only. :cool:
(Insert facepalm here)
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,749
9,673
113
#10
(Insert facepalm here)
Well I don't have anything useful to contribute, as I have never dated.

The only other thing I could post would be "wots a date" and that has been overdone.
 
G

Gojira

Guest
#13
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
I think that anything we do to seek out a mate could come under the heading you described. But, we are to be co-laborers. The Israelites were given land -- which they still had to fight for.

So, I think that unless God is telling you otherwise, or you know your goals to be wrong, you do what is right and appropriate to acquire what you want and are praying for.
 
N

notonmywatch

Guest
#14
I think that anything we do to seek out a mate could come under the heading you described. But, we are to be co-laborers. The Israelites were given land -- which they still had to fight for.

So, I think that unless God is telling you otherwise, or you know your goals to be wrong, you do what is right and appropriate to acquire what you want and are praying for.
This reminds me of the account of Abraham sending his servant to seek a wife for his son Isaac in Genesis chapter 24. Prayer was definitely involved, but so was human initiative.
 

Sculpt

Well-known member
Apr 18, 2021
1,147
368
83
#15
you think online dating goes against waiting on the Lord?

The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
Nope.

I cant think of how it could be (against waiting on the lord). Can you?

It's kind of like that old story of the guy stranded on a roof top, praying to God for help in a flood. And three people come by to save him, and he turns them away, because he's waiting on the Lord.
 

brighthouse98

Senior Member
Apr 16, 2015
672
339
63
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#16
Some rules to follow with online dating. 1. NEVER fall in LOVE!!! 2. Do not pour your heart out to anyone!! A girl in our church fell in love online, she wished to meet Bobby and Bobby turned out to be another girl!! Remember you can be and say anything to another online, even if it is a lie! Which in most cases is!! SO!!! When you place your trust in another other than the Lord, you're on shaky ground to say the least. Make sure by meeting that person before pouring out your heart, then if things work out, it was the Lord and if they do not, then you have learned something about trusting in self.
 
G

Gojira

Guest
#17
This reminds me of the account of Abraham sending his servant to seek a wife for his son Isaac in Genesis chapter 24. Prayer was definitely involved, but so was human initiative.
Exactly.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,104
3,200
113
#18
Some rules to follow with online dating. 1. NEVER fall in LOVE!!! 2. Do not pour your heart out to anyone!! A girl in our church fell in love online, she wished to meet Bobby and Bobby turned out to be another girl!! Remember you can be and say anything to another online, even if it is a lie! Which in most cases is!! SO!!! When you place your trust in another other than the Lord, you're on shaky ground to say the least. Make sure by meeting that person before pouring out your heart, then if things work out, it was the Lord and if they do not, then you have learned something about trusting in self.
I've had friends and romances online. Can't say they've all been liars. In fact only one did I find to be a liar.
I've opened up to numerous people online with no issue.
Know the Actual rules for online dating and don't he afraid to check people out.

My current gf, who I met online, was bothered by my caution of her being who she claimed, at first. Over time I became convinced she wasn't lying. A person who is secretive, seems to be hiding you, not very open about their life, etc... are red flags.
My gf, on the other hand, was open about her life and the people in it. And thus it became evident she was who she claimed.
Also she has since seen episodes of Catfish and now understands my initial skepticism.
Really there are ways to go about things without judging everyone as a liar.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,624
13,870
113
#20
The modern single Christian question….

Are we stepping out of God’s will and timing by trying to do things our own way?

(FYI I’m not online dating.)

What is your opinion on this?
Interesting question.

While I didn't meet my wife through an online dating site, I was using them when I was looking (obviously, there were no suitable candidates who were interested). In direct answer to your question, No.

Compare this to looking for a job. Do people sit on their couches waiting for someone to call and hire them? No! They get out and look. They apply. They take training. They prepare themselves. They try a few things.

Yes, a spouse is more important than a job, and a believer should take more care in choosing a spouse than in choosing a career. Certainly be seeking the Lord's will in the matter, along with prayerful support from trusted Christian friends. However, trusting God to bring along a mate when He hasn't specifically said that He will is like wandering through a hiring fair and not approaching any of the booths. You won't get hired... and you won't get married.