How Did Your Spiritual Journey Begin?

Sean, i hope you dont mind me asking what part of the Bible did you read first and when did you notice a difference?

"Got a grip on your words. Very competitive and high-tech world we live in. A lot of good,
and a lot of not-so-good. I try to post interesting things as there is a great diversity among readers.
Finding some harmony shall always be a challenge."
God Bless.

Sorry you had to go through all of that. I was diagnosed with schizophrenia back in 2010 after I felt like I was losing my mind. Ended up going to a mental hospital for a week or so. I remember being in the room next to the padded bedroom. There was a woman in there hitting all of the walls and screaming for hours. I was in a facility with some really nuts people. They ended up moving me to a safer area cause I was quiet and smiled a lot. They thought there was something wrong with me cause I smiled too much...When I did enter that facility originally I literally thought I was in hell. Felt like I was in hell too. My mind was burning and they kept feeding me pills, not knowing my diagnosis. Just trying anything to sedate me. They ended up bringing me there cause I threw a doctor and a few nurses to the ground cause they kept trying to give me pills. They strapped me to a bed and injected me with something and I knocked out and woke up at that hell place. When I got transferred to the safer area, a big black woman let me read her Bible. It was probably the only thing that soothed my mind and there was a glow about her. I played ping pong with a few asian girls who were there volunteering just to help out with making sure the patients were enjoying their time there. Eventually my God father and God brother came and rescued me and let me stay with them for year. I was literally right back to college the next week after experiencing that and I got a job as a dog handler at a doggy daycare probably a month after that. Looking back, I had no idea how I was just able to keep going. My mind was destroyed and I never was the same.

Then in 2015 I was rediagnosed as schizoaffective because of how high functional I was and then this year I got rediagnosed to bipolar, which I think anyone in the world would rather be diagnosed bipolar than schizo anything. Just due to the stigma.

You'd be surprised about how more advanced mental health treatment is becoming. Pretty soon, they may have something for you. You just got to believe there is nothing wrong with you, cause there isn't.

Annoyed with myself, haven't looked in here for a couple of days friend. You are so right, since '20 it seems to me the world has gone mad and is becoming an ever more angry place, so the qualities which make us human are diminishing in many.

Give yourself some serious credit Bingo, you say many wise and beautiful things, God's blessings and all that's good for now

Totally agree with Daisy Sean, think you're yet another victim of the cruel system we live in. It increasingly seems to me those who think outside the tiny box welcome in this system are condemned, so those who don't conform are deemed to be a problem.

We're not, just know when something stinks and don't want to be forced to smell it. Glad i'm old and have the confidence to insist on this far but no further so far, when it comes to my own life. However, think the powers that shouldn't be want to put an end to such choice.

Sometimes we are just a repentance away from true healing

I think if I just didn’t stop going to church when I was younger, I would have never faced that situation. Took 13 years to rebel against the system. 1 more year after that to find a nurse practitioner that will put me on a more natural path of health.

"I do hope all is well with you. Yes, we are living in a very restless and dysfunctional society
in today's world. A society that has surely lost its Spiritual equilibrium. Morality has become
profoundly out of order. I believe the "Christian" society as a whole, collectively has turned to
their own worldly desires. A "great falling away from God" has been told of...and would come to be.
Thank you for your thoughts."
God be with you."
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That is so beautiful and true Sean, spoke to my heart and mind. Really recommend to others on this thread to read through the exchange between Daisy and you.

i'm wiping tears from my eyes but thank both of you for what i've learned from reading it, God's blessings and love and hugs from me to you both.

I truly appreciate that. It’s been quite the 14 years. Having close friends during that time, telling me not to read the Bible because it’s bad for my mind. Same friend who told me to say the sinners prayer and accept Jesus as my lord and savior convincing me that and me believing him because he comes from a Christian family and his dad was a pastor. I spent ten years old my life being his best friend because I thought that was a real Christian friend. The more I learned about Christianity from Paul, the more I realized that my friend didn’t have godly characteristics and that he was just trying to control me. So one day I just text that we are no longer friends. It was one of the hardest things i had to do. He wanted me to have every decision I made go through him first for him to approve it or not. Just crazy stuff. There were moments where he said his family was going to have to move in and live with him, where all the money I made would have to go to him, a conservatorship. The moment I told my Christian therapist all of this a year ago, she immediately empathized with me and and suggested I create some boundaries but instead of boundaries i just cut him out of my life. No more being led by Joshua. Now just trusting God and things just seem to work out.

Top o' the morn sweet friend, not a netflix, amazon etc addict, so rely on friends to inform
me of new series i 'll like. You've just done that, My Demon looks worth a binge watch to me.

Some stuff to sort so won't be around much today, might have an hour or so later. Blessings, cheers and hugs for now

Seemed the best reaction to your last comment Sean, really agree with the choices you made, especially ditching that so-called friend. In all fairness it probably was pure concern for you at first. However, it's easy for such things to spiral out of control if you haven't yet made a habit of questioning your motives.

Absolutely promise i'm not saying this just to make you feel good but you seem to have learned a lot from that experience. Truly surprised how grounded you seem and looks like you've learned/inwardly digested much from it, in a way that will benefit you and others you're close to in future.

Kudos to you, think the LORD is keeping an eye on you too, hugs and all that's good to you friend.

Real cheers for that, it's lovely coming from someone who suffers/suffered the problem too and yep! I too have strong depressive tendencies and among those i know who experience the problem, being prone to depression is very common. They both are strongly linked to chemical imbalance in the brain, binge drinking is very possibly overdosing on feel good chemicals, we sometimes don't realise it's what is happening in time.

Your boss sounds a wise, compassionate man, think you received the best help possible and you were still so young. Think women are less prone to drinking regularly than men but it was very dangerous for me when i did. For me it was bolt from the blue stuff, suddenly finding i just didn't want to smoke or drink, before my spiritual interests took hold. So glad they have, these are very frightening, troubling times and the new knowledge really helps me understand much more.

Thanks again, God's blessings to you and hope we chat again.

I also get very deppressed and suicidal whenever I do things. like look at porn, or thnk too much.

Feel free to come and talk to us here when you're feeling down.

I really hope we can help. ❤️

And we will surely pray 🙏🏼 for you.

yeah. thats what i do.
I have been feeling down lately. because i am masturbating again. and it feels harmless. but as in another thread, kisiing is not bad itself, just what it can cause. same sorta with masturbating.
and i have been reflecting on my past. i have had some trauma in the past. as a child, some, unrelated to my recent past.

you do.

thank you.
~David

yeah. thats what i do.
I have been feeling down lately. because i am masturbating again. and it feels harmless. but as in another thread, kisiing is not bad itself, just what it can cause. same sorta with masturbating.
and i have been reflecting on my past. i have had some trauma in the past. as a child, some, unrelated to my recent past.

you do.

thank you.
~David

Hi David,

I'm really sorry to hear about your past trauma and can definitely understand how that shapes what we're drawn to. I will definitely pray for you. Most everyone here is struggling, or has struggled, with similar things, so don't feel like you're alone.

Let's talk about some of the great things you're doing -- I've been enjoying reading your posts and you have a good sense of humor! We are enjoying having you here.

i have some very strange habits.
I have worn jeans for the last year and have taken them off for a total of about 3 days in that time.
Because i am afraid of my penis. its no fair that grls get bras and men dont get something for our penis.

I have only recently (last month) begun exposing more than my hand and face (meaning arms) ever.