abused

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shellby

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I grew up in a home with nothing but abuse. My mother and father split up when I was young. My father got with another woman. My father was very abusive. Then the stepmother treated me and an older brother wrong. while my dad we going to the bar drinking my step mother was a bartender. I was the second oldest of six kids. The older brother while their parents were away raped me and a younger brother then molested it girl. then the younger brother he molested begin to molest me from 9th grade all the way through 11th grade. I told my dad he took it over with the stepmother. The stepmother then came in and said don't feel bad when he tells me for every little thing I do because I deserved what I got. Then I became 18 I left the house on fathers day. I had another sister through my biological mother that had issues cuz my mom did drugs while she was pregnant with her. well my mom is still doing drugs so I went and I talked my mom into giving her up for custody. And then my sister is now in a foster home adopted. then when I left my dads house I was homeless for 3 months then I ran to a lot of Christian families I got baptized and saved. but everything I've been through as a child is still coming back I used to be a cutter and I'm ready to start cutting again. I'm losing faith I have no hope. Sometimes I wish I was never born.
 
Welcome, sister shellby! I can guarantee you there are plenty of people here who have experienced abuse like you have (including me). You will find friends here you can talk to. In the meantime, dear ~ here are some places who offer help when you need it. I totally recommend RAINN!

https://www.rainn.org/

About Samaritans NYC - The Samaritans

Faithful Father, I pray for my sister shellby and ask that she find joy and rest in Your arms of love. Renew her spirit and mind and restore her precious life in Your grace, Jesus! Thank You for bringing our sister to us here in CC. Bless her always, Lord!
 
Oh, Shelby you don't want to start cutting. I am so sorry that your childhood was full of abuse. I want you to know that God never wants that for his children and what happens is the enemy gets involved and he is the one responsible for destroying families. The one good thing that you have is you are saved and you are not in that home anymore. I suggest getting involved with an active church and keep yourself busy. As a result of this your self esteem will grow and who knows what will happen from there. I would also suggest going through counseling to heal from your trauma growing up. You did not deserve what happened to you, no matter what anyone says, that is a lie from the enemy. Start faithfully reading the bible, it is filled with encouraging stories that will uplift you when you feel bad.
 
shellby said:
I grew up in a home with nothing but abuse. My mother and father split up when I was young. My father got with another woman. My father was very abusive. Then the stepmother treated me and an older brother wrong. while my dad we going to the bar drinking my step mother was a bartender. I was the second oldest of six kids. The older brother while their parents were away raped me and a younger brother then molested it girl. then the younger brother he molested begin to molest me from 9th grade all the way through 11th grade. I told my dad he took it over with the stepmother. The stepmother then came in and said don't feel bad when he tells me for every little thing I do because I deserved what I got. Then I became 18 I left the house on fathers day. I had another sister through my biological mother that had issues cuz my mom did drugs while she was pregnant with her. well my mom is still doing drugs so I went and I talked my mom into giving her up for custody. And then my sister is now in a foster home adopted. then when I left my dads house I was homeless for 3 months then I ran to a lot of Christian families I got baptized and saved. but everything I've been through as a child is still coming back I used to be a cutter and I'm ready to start cutting again. I'm losing faith I have no hope. Sometimes I wish I was never born.
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Shellby, please click the links I provided here to read my own personal story with depression and suicide..I know how you feel about losing faith and wanting to harm yourself.

http://christianchat.com/miscellaneous/94727-depression-ladybugs-true-story-dark-vs-light.html

http://christianchat.com/miscellaneous/95082-suicidal-thoughts-attempts-loss-loved-ones-suicide.html


Please read these and feel free to message me anytime you want to talk or vent.. :)
 
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