How best can one ward off sexual advacement from colleagues at work place?
- Thread starter maxima
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First, welcome to CC!
Others have given good answers, so I don't have much to add that's new. Just one thought though: there are different kinds of interaction that may be interpreted as "sexual advance". A person who is friendly and kind may be seen as "interested" when they aren't. Someone expressing interest in you if you're both single isn't wrong if done respectfully, unless your workplace has clear policies against it. If you aren't interested in the other person (for any reason), make that clear and change the subject or walk away. Repeated expressions of unwanted interest constitute harassment, but you probably would need to make your non-interest clear.
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RodB65
Guest
Reading Christian books while on break can put an end to unwanted conversation too!
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Wild
Guest
Greetings Maxima and welcome to CC...
Your profile says that you are a single-male and your inquiry refers to 'overcoming sexual temptation from female & male colleagues'...
Because you choose the word 'temptation' and not 'harassment' - both pose very distinct problems and unique resolutions...
Are you receiving advancements from both a male and a female? If yes, Are they approaching you individually, are they aware of the other persons advancements as well?
If you are struggling with sexual temptation - you should pray to the lord for strength to continue to resist such temptations.
If you are hopeful to resume a professional working relationship and avoid any future tensions in the work space consider:
- letting them know that you are adamantly opposed to being involved with colleagues, and that you are saving yourself for someone who has the same spiritual beliefs and moral values... ie they are just wasting their time...
- If they persist, politely inform that that you will consider this their 2nd warning and that you will only allow them one more warning and then you would be forced to provide them the following ultimatum...
- Upon their third unwanted advancement you would like to afford them the opportunity to speak to the supervisor to seek alternative work arrangements (different shifts, different desks, location etc); or that you will be forced to bring it to the supervisors attention as a formal complaint...
- with the intention to file a formal content each and everytime these unwanted advances occur from that third warning going forward...
Good Luck
Yes, I had similar inquiries for @cinder given her response...
The 'one reason' question sounds like the pass or fail question for the sphinx in the God's of Egypt... Is it pass or fail and move on, or does a guy get a do over? BTW, the sphinx allowed his bewildered victims three attempts to get the right answer...
So for both curiosity and clarity: Is your position to use only your head and not your heart or both your head and your heart? And does this position directly correlate with the response to the 'one reason' question?
Well I guess it depends a lot on how you define being asked out on a date. I would define it as someone invites you to spend time one on one having expressed a clear romantic intent. By that definition, I don't think it's ever happened; though I guess it's possible it happened with someone who I'd already ruled out for one reason or another and so it never being a possibility I don't even remember being asked. That doesn't mean I don't interact with guys at all, in my younger years I was very comfortable interacting with guys ( and was pretty comfortable with the we both want to do this so let's do it together even if it's just the two of us) probably so much so that I never was quite mysterious enough to be attractive to most of them.
As for the one reason question, let's say there are multiple right answers and it's not so much a trick question as a clarifying one; and it probably sounds harsher than it is because all I'd really be looking for is an answer that shows he's paid enough attention to know something about me and helps me understand his view of dating.
As for heart vs head, I'm just naturally distrustful of strong emotion so the more it attacks the more I'm going to strive to be practical and logical. Most of the time I can keep the emotions pretty well restrained so that I just don't let myself wander into emotionally vulnerable territory until I make a rational decision to do so (apparently that's a rather unique quality, but it's how the inner workings of cinder work).
Well, I'd say while adding clarity to the mystery that you are inherently about as mysterious as they come... Thank you for sharing how the inner
workings of cinder work...
For some reason a song keeps playing through my head...
Wes King said:
It has to be freezing to snow
It has to be burning to glow
It has to be willing and ready to know
It has to be able to grow
Don't say I love you too soon
Late nights holding hands
And staring at the moon
On romantic nights
Your feelings can lie
Don't say I love you too soon
You have to be listening to learn
You have to be desperate to yearn
You must be involved to be concerned
You have to be wise to discern
Don't say I love you too soon
Late nights holding hands
And staring at the moon
On romantic nights
Your feelings can lie
Don't say I love you too
'Cause it's a phrase
That brands the heart with fire and iron
And it's the phrase
That sent a man to die for you and me
So
Don't say I love you too soon
Late nights holding hands
And staring at the moon
On romantic nights
Your feelings can lie
Don't say I love you
Don't say I love you too
Don't say I love you too soon
Wes King said:
It has to be freezing to snow
It has to be burning to glow
It has to be willing and ready to know
It has to be able to grow
Don't say I love you too soon
Late nights holding hands
And staring at the moon
On romantic nights
Your feelings can lie
Don't say I love you too soon
You have to be listening to learn
You have to be desperate to yearn
You must be involved to be concerned
You have to be wise to discern
Don't say I love you too soon
Late nights holding hands
And staring at the moon
On romantic nights
Your feelings can lie
Don't say I love you too
'Cause it's a phrase
That brands the heart with fire and iron
And it's the phrase
That sent a man to die for you and me
So
Don't say I love you too soon
Late nights holding hands
And staring at the moon
On romantic nights
Your feelings can lie
Don't say I love you
Don't say I love you too
Don't say I love you too soon
I am lucky at work at a Christian organization where everyone is very friendly and these kinds of advances are unheard of. But I will not lie; because I feel there is a sibling relationship missing in my life since I was very young, when some coworkers come up to me - I sometimes wish we were friends. Because I am married, I simply thank the Lord for the kind and voluntary interactions my coworkers sometimes engage me with.
Sorry to keep running 'off-topic' here (where's the OP?).. I got the answer to the riddle
... Kinda like Monk and Ben Affleck in the Accountant - I'm a compulsive/professional problem solver - doing some of my best problem solving during my sleep and long walks with my dog... While the price of participation here is free - the price of uncovering the answer to this 'one reason question' for our very own cc unicorn is priceless... 
lol ... Of course - the answer in of itself is as deep, complex and unique as our mysterious cinder suggests and while it remains 'off-topic' here, it is probably better suited for it's very own topic (not my call); at the same time maybe the hypothesized answer(s) to such a mysterious conundrum are likely better reserved for a non-public forum... wouldn't want to inadvertently give all the foxes out there the keys to the hens house... albiet, it wouldn't do the foxes any good anyway...
i've been fortunate to not have a coworker make sexual advancements towards me, so I’m not able to really give advice.
If something like this would happen to me, I imagine I would be very clear with the individual and say I’m not interested. It’s probably easier said than done.
If something like this would happen to me, I imagine I would be very clear with the individual and say I’m not interested. It’s probably easier said than done.
S
Sweetmorningdew78
Guest
I work in a very large hospital. a real issue. I try to dress in modestly loose scrubs and remain professional.
U would get trouble in germany. Here chatting, greeting and smiling at everyone is daily bread. Its very impolite not to
I guess im too direkt. I let ppl know when I have a problem with them and take it up with God.
We have a lot of antifa in my class. One even watches drag queen shows on the school laptop and promotes all sorts of stuff even in school.
She likes to provoke me but se learned fast that confronting me openly is not a good idea and has become careful around me. I get tempted to go to school with my MAGA hat. But by the grace of God he brought me back to earth before I could make a bad decision
We have a lot of antifa in my class. One even watches drag queen shows on the school laptop and promotes all sorts of stuff even in school.
She likes to provoke me but se learned fast that confronting me openly is not a good idea and has become careful around me. I get tempted to go to school with my MAGA hat. But by the grace of God he brought me back to earth before I could make a bad decision
