You seem to focus very intensely on all the negative aspects of sex. Like the assault and harassment allegations you allude to. That seems to color your whole perception of the entire idea of sex, even loving marital sex.
If you, for whatever reason, believe it's impossible for people (or women) to enjoy sex, well, OK. Clearly you won't be moved on that point. Somehow, that's not stopping married couples from having sex, though. I guess the only way for a wife to have sex then is through the manipulation of her sex-crazed husband?
I don't mean to lead you into temptation at all. I'm saying people can enjoy sex. Something we seem to disagree on. OK, fine. So be it.
Jesus never ate chocolate, either. Is it bad to enjoy chocolate?
"If [sex]
were so good, why must it be restricted within wedlock?" That's a good question, actually. I don't think that particular inquiry has come up yet in this thread. But let's look at it. There's good reasons.
In 1 Corinthians 7:2 we're told that
“But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.” In Hebrews 13:4 we're told that
"Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” Here, we have both adultery and fornication contrasted with what happens in the marriage bed. Marriage (and sex within marriage) is called honorable. All other types of sexual activity are condemned as immoral, and as something God will judge.
In Genesis and in the Gospels, we’re told that when people marry, they become “one flesh" (Gen. 2:24) Jesus also mentions this in Matt. 19:5 and Mark 10:7) Of course, in the Bible marriage was basically synonymous with having sex. We see that all the time when the Bible talks about people consummating their marriage. And, in the modern age, we know that, when people do have sex, our brains get chemical spikes (dopamine and oxytocin) that make us feel “in love” and “attached.” This is dangerous in the dating stage, because it makes us form attachments to people who may not be good for us and people who, apart from a shared sexual experience, we may have little in common with. There’s not really such a thing as “casual” sex. In physical terms, sex is the most intimate way that you'll ever physically connect with someone else.
Before marriage, a couple has no binding union, and they’ve entered no sacred covenant. Without marriage, and without the marriage vows, they have no right to exploit the culmination of such vows.
And, of course, if people had less premarital sex, there would be less STDs, unwanted pregnancies, unwed mothers, abortions, or children growing up in broken families.
"Why did God torture Eve with excruciating pain in childbirth, Gen. 3:16, as the natural consequence of it?" That verse tells us that a woman’s pain in childbirth is part of the suffering brought into the world through sin. It also seems that, even before the Fall, there was already pain in childbirth. When the text notes God saying,
“I will greatly multiply your pain in childbirth” it uses a Hebrew word meaning “to increase.” The pain of childbirth would be
more than before.
Of course, we don't fully understand all the reasons as to why Eve was judged with a level increased pain in childbirth. But we do know that this judgment impacted the rest of Eve’s life and serves as an ongoing reminder of the far-reaching consequences of sin.
You seem to think that everyone's decision to date, marry and have sex will inevitably result in failure and disaster. Well, if you think that....good news!
You don't have to get married if you don't want to. It's your choice.
You also mention
"allegations of sexual assault or harassment." Again, there's good and godly ways for Christians to enjoy sex. There's bad, harmful, and sinful ways for people to experience sex.
You also mention self-control. A Christian exercising self-control over their sexual desires does not mean they will completely eliminate their sexual desires. Again, sexual desires are not bad in and of themselves. It's not wrong to have sexual desires. But we can choose to fulfill these in either godly or sinful
ways.
And if you're a Christian, and you can't get married, then you'll have to stay abstinent. If there's a Christian out there dealing with truly prolonged, unwanted singleness, and perhaps never get to marry in their lifetime, then yes, they'll have to make sacrifices, and painful sacrifices at that. But Jesus did, after all, say that true discipleship would be like that.
I don't mean to sound harsh, but maybe try to show some compassion for people who
do have to deal with those situations, instead of "reminding" them that "
Hey, romance and sex isn't all that great anyway." If
you're genuinely content with your own singleness, great. If
you personally don't have strong sexual desires, great. But both Jesus and Paul said that not everyone is like that. And that's fine.
