This seems to be something only women care about, almost exclusively. As if, as long as they don’t get an std/pregnant, dozens of failed relationships have no effect on them. No harm, no foul.
Then there’s probably some girl math that says the body’s without std/pregnancy don’t count and a -1 for any curable disease.
Maybe it’s the average loss to men is so infinitely greater than any std.
I have never even heard of a man initiating this conversation. When I hear of this it is 100% a demand from women. All of the men in this thread likewise are against/indifferent about it. This is an example of women valuing different things than men. So for women to say “I’m willing so any man should also be willing”. It is not exactly an equal transaction that it is made out to be and it is presented in a manipulative way, “a man should be willing”. As if there is zero chance any information will not be weaponized later, it wouldn’t be kept private. They would be telling everyone at our job, facebook and town square “just to keep other women safe”.
Plus I think there’s more to this than is said. Asking without asking. I don’t know if it’s some power play or a reason to reject someone before being rejected. It sounds like a reasonable demand, which it is, up until it is presented in this way.
So what is the male equivalent? What is valuable to a man other than what a woman normally wouldn’t provide under any circumstance? It’s just a hypothetical in which most woman would say “no man should ask that”. Women feel they should be able to demand information they want while not disclosing things which they choose not to. In reality no secrets should be kept between two getting married.
I’m not saying men do not care, nor that it isn’t important. I don’t believe it is as reasonable a demand as it is presented. It is mearly one of many things that should be discussed. In the 90’s when they started sexualizing kids in school, they were teaching this lie “just as long as you both get tested nothing bad can happen”.
Women dislike condoms more than men, always have.
My college Microbiology had a memorable class which we learned some of these differences. That discussion is probably better for one of your Friday Night chat rooms.
Just remember, Front to Back.
Women do need to be careful around anything that can cause birth defects, from the time they are born until they are finished having children. This is because women are born with all the eggs they will ever have and they can be damaged inside the body, years in advance. The male counterpart is refreshed like every 3 days…
I shouldn’t have to clarify it here.
*Strait men
The fellas you’re hangin around might be interested in more than you think. I lived in TN, never heard a straight guy ask for it.
I've been thinking a lot about your posts.
* In saying that you've only heard of women being concerned about this issue/asking for tests and not straight men, I have to wonder how many straight men are sitting around telling each other they're going to ask their fiancee for an STD test. I'm guessing that just because they haven't mentioned it, that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
* I think it also might have to do with the general fact (and I say that loosely, not as an absolute) that women tend to be more concerned about their health than men. After all, even in the church, it's emphasized that women are "the weaker sex," and that can translate into taking women taking more health precautions because we know we're more vulnerable to some things than men.
A lot of straight men don't even wash their hands after going to the restroom, let alone get regular health checks. Not that every woman washes her hands either, but I'm guessing a lot more guys forego the soap and water than women, especially if they're not taking children to the bathroom with them.
* Men are culturally taught to be strong and show no weaknesses, therefore, I'm guessing many men just don't bother going in for regular health check-ups in general (let's assume everyone had equal access to them.)
If we took a poll here, I wonder how many men vs. how many women go in for annual checkups? (Again, IF they had access, as I know in the USA, health insurance has become an unaffordable luxury.)
I just Googled the infamous "turn your head and cough" test, and it said men should have this done every 1-3 years. How many men actually go in for these kinds of checkups -- willingly?
* If we took another poll asking how many men vs. women go to the doctor regularly, what would it look like if we asked how many men would say they go willingly, or only because their wives or someone else pushed them to go? In other words, how many men vs. women go by their own choice, and not because someone else is nagging them to do so?
STD's aren't the only ailments that can show no symptoms while silently doing a lot of damage -- blood pressure and diabetes ranks up there as well as only being determined through medical evaluation, but many people don't get tested, so they don't know (and don't want to know.)
My point is, maybe you haven't heard of (straight, as you emphasized) men asking for STD tests because in general, men are taught to try to put on the appearance of being invincible, and in general, choose less testing and scrutiny about their health as a whole. I can't imagine many manly men sitting around talking about the risks of STD's (though I wish that would happen) because they want to keep up the appearance of being invincible.
I'm not saying I agree with this (I think men should absolutely be taught it's ok to take care of themselves and ask for help,) but I do suspect that you not hearing talk about this among men is not just about STD's, but about the differences in how men and women approach preventative health care in general.
I could be wrong, but it's what I've witnessed in the men I've been around ("No, it's nothing, I'm ok, and no, I'm not going to get it checked out.")
