I apologize. I am just seeing this! This has been one of the worst days of my life. I am struggling with my feelings. I am a more feeling or sensitive person by nature and it's like I can't get my feelings back for my Mom. We were always so close! It scares me that I will forget her or stop missing or loving her! I feel like I am in a nightmare I can't wake up from!
Yes, I will add you to my prayer list! I'm truly sorry for what you have and are going through! This is one thing I can relate to!
No need to apologize. It's ok.
I wouldn't worry about the feelings you have for your Mom right now.
Feelings change and resurface often.
I'm trying to recover as soon as possible by learning and applying God's Word. I think I am being led to some good teaching on depression and recovery from post traumatic stress and a bunch of other physical damage that recently occurred. For instance, An expert in PTSD explained coping mechanisms that different people experience to deal with serious emotional trauma. Perhaps that's just temporary so you can get some sleep and recover. There are many times I ask God to help me to put certain people and events out of my mind because I can't handle it them.
There are dynamics in my own life that are uniquely difficult . King David had such intense emotional afflictions t.
There are so many things that remind me of my beloved Mother too.
The stress hormones that occur stay in the blood stream and circulates, causing physical harm to organs until it's deactivated by exercise and a number of other things.
Grief can literally cause serious health problems like mine. There have been numerous traumas leading up to the death and several following. I would have been dead right now if not for God's mercy.
I noticed that as I cared for my parents in their time of need, we grew closer and that made it ironically harder on me when they passed. I'm guessing it's the same for you and your own Mom.
That said, I would just thank the Lord for showing you comfort and mercy. As time goes on, fond memories should start returning as you are able to handle them and greater love as you can process them in a healthy, less stressful manor is my simple opinion. I might be wrong, but it might be worth considering as you go through this process that the change in feelings is a dynamic and temporary response to your distress.
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