Sex & other activities.

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Sharp

Senior Member
May 5, 2009
2,570
23
38
#61
HA!

I totally thought the "other activities" part of the thread title was referring to things like scrabble or picnicking -- which is hilariously awesome. Boy was I suprised.

- Topher
hey welcome back mate

hows the war going?
 
M

mollyBird

Guest
#62
Save yourself for marriage. ALL of yourself. Even if you don't cross the line and have sex, you're still giving parts of yourself away as you become more physical with the person you're with. And when the relationship ends (which most of them do) you'll realize you really did lose, when you weren't even aware you were giving that much away.

Perfectly Said​
 
Jan 13, 2010
98
0
0
#63
I hope no one minds if I throw a little spanner in the works - I agree with everything here I have seen so far, there's just something I think is worth adding. I think that whatever it is you define lust as, and whilst dwelling on thoughts and circumstances that feed temptation to do what would be unholy for the present time is definitely out-of-bounds, one has to - somewhere in the background - also realise that desire - on hold - is ok.

It's a rude shock when you reach marriage and everything you've trained yourself to see as bad and sinful and no stay away from that, is all of a sudden not only ok but in fact what you're supposed to do. Everything has to be redefined and the results can be really messed up if you had a wrong view of sex in the first place.

Sex is not bad, evil, or even sinful to desire. It is a normal bodily drive given by God as a gift. It's a good thing. Sex..and other activities... outside of marriage is the unintended abuse of this gift, but this shouldn't be confused with sex being bad.

I'm reminded of something I've heard some friends of mine say to their four year old, which makes a good example. Occasionally, the kid observes his parents drinking coffee, and asks for some. They don't tell him "no, coffee is bad - yucky, you don't want coffee".. what they say, and I've often heard him repeat in his adorable little voice, is "coffee is for big hands".. and they compare hands.. "you've got little hands, see? Mummy and Daddy have big hands". When he sees coffee now he faithfully repeats "Big hands - I've got little hands, see?"

My point is that whilst avoiding tempation and emphasizing the reasons to do so are important, it's also necessary to make the distinction that the sentiment ought not be "No, that's bad. Don't want it." But rather "Not yet. I want it, so I won't spoil it".

I say this stuff not as one who has it together but as a complete hypocrit. But a hypocrit who knows the truth none the less.

Good luck. xx
very well said ,before i was married my wife drew a line(figuratively speaking) about us having sex before marriage,and i loved her enough to respect her wish.and now i'm glad i did
 

QuestionTime

Senior Member
Feb 16, 2010
1,435
20
38
#64
I want to point out where it says "Christ has taken away my sins; and there is no more condemnation for me"

Think about what that says. His sins are gone, and he is no longer condemned for what he has done in his past.
I don't think we are in disagreement in any way DMurray. But just in case, when I included that reference from Wesley, I included it to show how this man's sins were taken away. But though his sins were removed and never held against him again by God, he had still to suffer the earthly penalty of death.

I likened this example to marriage (becoming one flesh). I don't believe that just because we are forgiven, that we are suddenly no longer one flesh with people we have slept with in the past. I think those bonds stay with us for a lifetime.

Quest
 
D

Dmurray

Guest
#65
I don't think we are in disagreement in any way DMurray. But just in case, when I included that reference from Wesley, I included it to show how this man's sins were taken away. But though his sins were removed and never held against him again by God, he had still to suffer the earthly penalty of death.

I likened this example to marriage (becoming one flesh). I don't believe that just because we are forgiven, that we are suddenly no longer one flesh with people we have slept with in the past. I think those bonds stay with us for a lifetime.

Quest
That bond is a spiritual bond though not a fleshly bond. When we're born again, it's not our flesh that is born again, but our Spirit, as we were baptized into Christ and it is not our life anymore, we surrendered our will to him. Now if your Spirit is re-born, then that would mean it's fresh and that there is no pre-existing things from the previous "life".
 
M

Maddog

Guest
#66
HA!

I totally thought the "other activities" part of the thread title was referring to things like scrabble or picnicking -- which is hilariously awesome. Boy was I suprised.

- Topher
Heh. Talk about multi-tasking.
 

QuestionTime

Senior Member
Feb 16, 2010
1,435
20
38
#67
That bond is a spiritual bond though not a fleshly bond. When we're born again, it's not our flesh that is born again, but our Spirit, as we were baptized into Christ and it is not our life anymore, we surrendered our will to him. Now if your Spirit is re-born, then that would mean it's fresh and that there is no pre-existing things from the previous "life".
When you have sex with someone, it affects your emotions. I watched a video recently describing the four different chemicals that are released into the brain during sexual intercourse, as well as chemicals released into the brains of new parents. These chemicals are designed by God to create emotional bonds; bonds between lovers, and bonds between parents and their children. These chemicals create permanent imprints in the brain and are stored in our brains until we die. As I was watching this video DMurray, I immediately understood what the Bible meant by us becoming "one flesh."

Sorry too, but the video is by subscription only so I can't give you a link. I don't remember the names of the chemicals either without watching the video again and I am not interested in doing so right now. You'll have to take my word on it.

Christians - in general - do not tend to give enough credit to the physical body that God created. The reality is that we cannot think or cry out to God without a functioning brain. In this line of thought I also want to mention a different video that I viewed recently on YouTube, this one teaching about the genetic code. According to the genetic code, there are only two possible emotions. One is fear and the other is love. Based on how people feel, their genetic code will only allow a human being to access certain abilities. As soon as I saw this video, I began to realize how mankind fell into a sinful state and why we can't get out of it. As soon as God brings us from a life of slavish fear of death to a life of love, our genetic code will allow us to move forward in an obedient life.

It's all quite incredible, and a lot more is required of the human body - in the process - than I ever would have believed possible.

Quest
 
C

Co_IsaaC

Guest
#68
"but among you brothers, there must not be a HINT of SEXUAL inmorality, or any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's Holy people" Ephesians 5:3
thats one of my favorite verses, when temptation kicks in, i have to be reminded that not even a HINT, should be in my life. Whats a HINT for u?
set ur standar as high as u can because u will probably fall. also, my first language is spanish and its even clearer it says *not even a TALK about it* basicly.

Also, 1 thessalonians 4:1-8 very powerful verses. Read them in your own, but some quetes from there would be "it is God's will that u should be sanctified: THAT U SHOULD AVOID SEXUAL INMORALITY, 4 that each should learn to control his hown body in a way that is holy and honorable"
i would really encourage u to read the whole passage.

NIV
 
D

Dmurray

Guest
#69
When you have sex with someone, it affects your emotions. I watched a video recently describing the four different chemicals that are released into the brain during sexual intercourse, as well as chemicals released into the brains of new parents. These chemicals are designed by God to create emotional bonds; bonds between lovers, and bonds between parents and their children. These chemicals create permanent imprints in the brain and are stored in our brains until we die. As I was watching this video DMurray, I immediately understood what the Bible meant by us becoming "one flesh."

Sorry too, but the video is by subscription only so I can't give you a link. I don't remember the names of the chemicals either without watching the video again and I am not interested in doing so right now. You'll have to take my word on it.

Christians - in general - do not tend to give enough credit to the physical body that God created. The reality is that we cannot think or cry out to God without a functioning brain. In this line of thought I also want to mention a different video that I viewed recently on YouTube, this one teaching about the genetic code. According to the genetic code, there are only two possible emotions. One is fear and the other is love. Based on how people feel, their genetic code will only allow a human being to access certain abilities. As soon as I saw this video, I began to realize how mankind fell into a sinful state and why we can't get out of it. As soon as God brings us from a life of slavish fear of death to a life of love, our genetic code will allow us to move forward in an obedient life.

It's all quite incredible, and a lot more is required of the human body - in the process - than I ever would have believed possible.

Quest
Yes I completely agree, and I know what chemical's you're talking about just can't think of the name. BUT I think your getting away from Spirituality there and God and going into science. Yes God created all things, but when we're born again it's like God view's us as a new being, and forgets about what has happened in the past.

So back to my original point, if I was born again, then the person whom I had sex with, In God's eye's I'm not married to them. Yes our fleshly bodies still have that connection, but we have to let go of that burden and put it on God, we are new creatures now, we have to forget about what we did in our "past life" what's done is done, it's time to move on

I feel that you are sometimes trying to relate what we do as humans in our flesh too much to how God would view us, and our Spirit. They're separate, but at the same time yes they're connected.
I don't know if that makes any sense but I can't think of how to explain it.

Sometimes science and God just don't mix right?
 
D

Dmurray

Guest
#70
"but among you brothers, there must not be a HINT of SEXUAL inmorality, or any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's Holy people" Ephesians 5:3
thats one of my favorite verses, when temptation kicks in, i have to be reminded that not even a HINT, should be in my life. Whats a HINT for u?
set ur standar as high as u can because u will probably fall. also, my first language is spanish and its even clearer it says *not even a TALK about it* basicly.

Also, 1 thessalonians 4:1-8 very powerful verses. Read them in your own, but some quetes from there would be "it is God's will that u should be sanctified: THAT U SHOULD AVOID SEXUAL INMORALITY, 4 that each should learn to control his hown body in a way that is holy and honorable"
i would really encourage u to read the whole passage.

NIV
Thanks I do need to set a high standard because I keep falling.
 
R

riz_mahuzai

Guest
#71
hello everyone... I would like to share the gist of the book i read 'why wait till marriage' by Dr.Isabelo Magalit
according to the author.... God created sex for 3 reasons:
1. Procreation- Genesis 1:28 ... be fruitful and multiply
2. Companionship- Gen 2:18 None of the animals was an adequate partner for Adam, so God created Eve as 'helper fit for him'- to meet him in his need, and to make him complete..
3.Reflection of the unity in the Godhead...
Sex is not evil and sinful,,, in fact the bible teaches that it is one of the things that God created for our enjoyment (1 Timothy 4:3-5) but it is for the married only,,,

the bible teaches that sex and love belong together ...that true happiness is in holiness,and holiness is following God's instructions.

but what will I do with my sexual desire??? If you are not ready for marriage ..learn to wait.By saying no now and keeping yourself pure, you must learn to wait.The ability to say no is the essence of all true character.
Isn't it normal to masturbate,however???
Masturbation is sinful because it is outside God's design for the proper use of sex...Jesus said that we must not commit adultery (and by implication,fornication also) Matthew 5:27


How then may I expect to experience constant victory over sexual temptations???
By realizing that the Christian life is Christ's life in us ( COlossians 1:27). As we yield daily to the presence and power of the risen Lord Jesus, He will give us victory over all forms of sin...